Chapter 8

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{Felix pov}

I texted Chan that I'll be "staying at my cousins house for a week, cause he and his family are able to distract me" He was again suspicious at me but still didn't ask further.
I also texted Jeongin that I've found the place and thanked him millions of times.

Me and Changbin decided on watching another kdrama with Woo and San.
We were both sitting comfortably on the couch with San in my and Woo in Changbins lap.

About halfway through the movie, I started getting really tired again. I checked the time on my phone and it was already 2:34am, so I decided to ask him

"Where should I sleep later on?"

"Well there's only one bed in this house so you have three options: the couch, the floor or you can also sleep in my room next to me" he answered, waiting for my response.

This was my chance of cuddling him to sleep again, but at the same time what if he doesn't want to. Maybe he's just trying to be nice? What if I annoy him with my constant "I want to be close to you" I don't want him to regret asking me to stay...

"Lix, Lix? Are you still here or on another planet?" He asked, waving his hand in front of my face.
But I was still deep in my thoughts, thinking about weather to tell him or choose the couch instead.

"Okey I already know your answer then" he stated "you can sleep with me. And yes, I can cuddle you to sleep, you don't have to ask for it"

"I... y-yeah thanks"
Wow was I really this easy to look through? What the heck?

We continued to watch the movie, and by the end of it I had my eyes closed, almost completely asleep and barely noticing what was going on around me.

I heard him stand up from the couch, but didn't bother to open my eyes or move as I had no energy left from this long day, so I basically pretended to be asleep even though I was still a little aware of a few things.

He stood in front of the couch where I was laying, rolled up like a smol ball.
"Lix, you asleep already?"

I didn't answer, no movement

"If only you knew how much you drive me crazy Lee Felix"

Still didn't move.. but what does he mean by that? You're the one who's driving me crazy!

"You deserve so much better than someone like me" he added, placing his hand on my cheek, caressing it "you look so beautiful sleeping like that, how could I rob you of your sleep and make you cry every night?"
He was talking with a genuine and sincere yet completely broken voice. I wanted to say something, I had to, but I didn't.

"I'm happy to see you, even if it means I might harm myself even more"

With that he went away for a while, probably into the bathroom I guessed. And I was not near as sleepy as I was two minutes ago, but kept my eyes closed, his words repeating in my head over and over again like a broken cassette. "I might harm myself even more", "you look so beautiful", "you deserve someone better than me"
Yahh whats the meaning of all of that-
I've been here for a day and so much happened already. He's hurting and I really have to find out why.

Time passed, not sure how long I've been laying there after he left. He came back and stood in the same position in front of me again

"I wonder what you're dreaming about right now? hope you're at a happy place"

"This pain is nothing, if it means that you'll be happy, right?"

"Well, should I wake you up now or let you sleep here? ... I'd honestly just carry you like last time but my arms and legs wouldn't withstand that right know. I promised you cuddles though, what should I do sunshine?"

I wanted to just get up and show him that I'm here for him, no matter what he's going through. But I didn't, I stayed, pretending to be sleeping, although I'd be lying if I say I didn't want his cuddles again.

"Hey Lix, wake up" he said and started gently shaking me 'awake'
I acted like I was waking up, slowly opening my eyes and turning from side to side

"Mphm what is it Binnie? Its late~"
Man why didn't I become an actor, I'm good as fuck not gonna lie. He believed it, and helped me sit up.

"Sorry to wake you up, but I don't want your back to hurt from sleeping on the couch tomorrow"

"Mmh" I hummed, since that's what I mostly do when I'm tired.

"You wanna go to bed?"

"Mhm~~"

He helped me stand up and walked me to the bedroom, gently laying me on the bed and pulling the covers over my body.

"But Binnie~"

"Yes Lix"

"Wut bout chu~?"

"I'll be sleeping as well, don't worry. Also, didn't I promise you something?"

I smiled at him with sleepy eyes before he walked to the other side of the bed and slipped under the blankets.
I didn't waste a second and instantly pulled him into a hug, rubbing my head against his chest and appreciating the warm feeling he gave my heart.

"Whoa Felix" he laughed slightly "You're fast"

I only looked up at him with a big grin on my mouth and went back to cuddling onto him. He slowly and carefully placed his arms around me and returned the hug.
Thats another thing I've noticed.. his slow and cautious movements, but I didn't think much about it.

He ran one hand through my hair, massaging my head since he knew how relaxing that is for me.

"I'm with you, you can go back to sleep Lix"

Anxiety somehow won over me again and I tightened my grip around him.. what if...?

"Hey, it's alright sunshine, I promise you'll wake up with me next to you this time. I'm not going anywhere okey?"

I nodded and finally allowed myself to relax and eventually fall asleep, with the most important person in my life finally next to me again..

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Idk if I like this chapter or not
It's also shorter than my other chapters wich are usually at least 1500 words, this one is barely 1100🤠
Idk, is the story going too slow?

How's everyone doing?

I'm kind of procrastinating on studying for an upcoming exam right now🤠

I need to change a few things up since I think the story might be too boring for the readers. Oh God pls give me some creativity, I'm being too basic rn 🤠

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