Peaceful Body

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What if you were born with a body that you believe is not yours? What if this body you inhabitat was a body you did not deserve? Would you love your body? Or would you hate it, despise it? Would you want to trash it and just die?

I guess it all depends on what is wrong with your body.

So, what if your body was cursed? Haunted? Born with illness? Develops it later in life? What if you were missing one of your limbs? Or one of your body parts just didn't function? I could go on, but what do you do with a body that is completely hopeless? A body that is completely paralyzed? Would you kill yourself? Or would you live?

You don't have a choice. Your parents force you to live through this life of suffering and they get extensive surgery on you. You've been bed written your whole life. Why must you suffer just because of two selfish peoples' wishes?

I am Marvin Jefferson Linked, I am the fourth son to my parents and the last son they had. I was born as a paralyzed baby. I could not do anything on my own, the only thing I've learned to do without machinery help is speak. But, even then my speaking pattern is butchered and sloppy. I am getting better with time. In fact, it's getting close to my 18th birthday. Eighteen years of Hell and back. It was all Hell and frustrating. I could remember a time where I didn't know how to speak and I would try to do it, but nothing came out and my parents made all of the decisions. I was voiceless and motionless. Where was the freedom in that?

Simple; there was no freedom to my imprisonment.

My older brothers tried to make my life bearable and my parents tried to fill my life with happiness, but how could I be happy when they remind me of all the things I cannot do? Yes, I should be grateful for a family like mine given my circumstance, but I would rather be dead then live in a life of jealousy and imprisonment.

Or, that's what I used to think.

It happened years ago, but it still felt like it happened yesterday and even though it didn't happen in the best of circumstances, it still happened and I wouldn't wish for a different life. It started out rough, but in the end it was all worth it. Even if it was brief and short lived.

So, what happened in my life was that I met him. He was the light in my life with his blonde curly hair and his beautiful ocean eyes. He was like an angel that came from Heaven, but Heaven he should not come from for he was a child who was born with a curse. His curse was not like mine, but of a different one. He was born with cancer. He had lived with it all of his life. He was in and out of hospitals and he had recovered for a brief moment and in that moment he had met me.

It was a normal day of going to the hospital as my brothers pushed each other, laughed in merriment, and overall annoyed my parents. I was being wheeled into the hospital when all of a sudden a boy about my age came running out of nowhere and ran full force into me. My dad, who was wheeling me, had kept a steady hold onto my wheelchair as the boy fell flat on his ass. I had watched emotionlessly as he got up and dusted himself off. I watched as he had cursed and shook his head.

"Sorry, 'bout that. Didn't see ya there." His city accent was thick as day and I smiled at him.

"Itsss fiiine." I blushed a bit at my slurred words. I watched as the boy smiled pitifully at me and my heart leapt forward for the anger that I felt, but could not express it besides just giving him a glare that soon turned into a void.

"Ah, retarded, right?" I closed my eyes tightly as I could hear the onslaught that he faced from my dad and older brothers. They were ruthless and I was glad they were, but sometimes it was uncalled for, unnecessary.

After a while of just murdering the poor boy my mother cleared her throat and the men of the house had settled down.

"I'm sorry about that sweetie. These men have no control when it comes to Marvin. Quite the protective bunch if you ask me. Anyway, Marvin is not retarded. So, if you ever dare say that ever again then you'll find your testicles stapled to your front door." I look to the boy and find him gulping as he nods and runs past my family as he runs to the parking lot. I sigh.

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