flipped | lippa

An Evening of Mourning

"Buzz buzz!" Pippa stood at the bottom of Lin's apartment complex, in an big oversized sweater to keep her warm on this cold New York night. She held a plate of cookies she'd made for him, which were still warm and their fresh scent wafted through the air. Small particles of snow rested on her hair as a gentle wind blew by.  Her nose was a shade of pale pink from the cold, and she shivered quietly.  

"Who's there?" Lin asked grimly over the buzzer. 

"It's Phillipa." She replied. He unlocked the door and she headed up the stairs to his apartment. 

When she reached the top, she knocked on the door. When Lin answered, he was looking rough. He had dark circles under his eyes and was looking pale in a black turtleneck. It was obvious he'd been crying for a while, and his eyes had a new depth of sadness to them that she had never seen before. 

"Oh Lin," Pippa started. She didn't know what to say or how to act. She gave him a hug that he obviously needed, and she could tell by the way he overflowed into her arms. He felt cold and weak, like he could snap in half at any second. She spotted Sebastian on the floor, playing with a race car. She wondered if he was oblivious, or if he was even old enough to understand. Maybe it was better that way, for him not to be able to comprehend the loss. No sadness, no grief.

She handed him the plate of cookies. "Freshly made. Thought it might cheer you up a tiny bit." She felt silly after saying that. There was no way she could try to fill the emptiness inside of his heart with a plate of stupid cookies.

"Thanks Pip," He smiled. "Your cookies are always the best." He set them on the counter with a limp hand. She was about to ask him how he was doing, but figured the answer was obvious. 

For the next hour or so, Pippa played with Sebastian and put him down to sleep. All the while Lin sat on the couch, lifeless and emotionless. Pippa sat next to him for a few minutes in silence, unsure of of what to say. So she didn't try.

"I think I'm gonna go to bed," Lin said softly. 

"Oh alright, I'll get going."

"Oh," Lin said. "I was hoping you might... I dunno. I'd hate to be alone tonight. Would you mind maybe...?" 

Pippa still felt awkward after what had happened at the bar with Lin a while back. They were both flirty, but at the time it seemed like a joke, because it was impossible. But now, she didn't know. Steven was out of the picture. So was Vanessa. But she couldn't help but feel guilty. His wife had just passed away. It felt like betrayal. But Lin was mourning, and whatever helped him to cope was what she would do to help him. 

"Of course, no problem." Pippa reassured him. He smiled and thanked her. They got ready for bed and they climbed in opposite sides. Lin flicked off the light, and she could hear him breathing sadly and heavily. Then she felt his hand touch hers. It was gentle and sad. It didn't feel like betrayal because it wasn't. Who was she betraying? Soon enough Lin had his arms wrapped around her like a teddy bear. She comforted him back, for she knew he was grieving and needed someone to be there for him. They lay there embracing one another, tears streaming down Lin's face and him holding tight to Pippa.