Truly Yours • Kim Mingyu

[fifteen]

There's only one king sized bed inside this gigantic hotel room. I'm not sure how I should react to this. Sharing a room is one thing, but sharing a bed is on an insane level.

"Wonwoo? Why's there only one bed?" He releases a quick chuckle. 

How can he feasibly laugh in this situation of crisis? Is my panic a joke to him?

"Actually me and Hoshi were supposed to come here alone. We're used to sharing a bed. Besides, double bed was expensive." He rubs his nape, eyes wandering.

"I'm going to drown myself in the nearest ocean. Be right back. Have a great day." He chuckles.

"Why, you have problem . . . sharing a bed with me?" He asks me in a manner of politeness, in which one could ever ask that question to the opposite gender.

My whole body reacts to that. For about 5 solid minutes, both of us just stand still in our position without saying anything. My utter silence is tensing up the atmosphere. Both of us can definitely feel it under our skin.

He's waiting.

I'm scrutinizing; do I have problem?

I don't know.

He is giving me the kind of look in which he is saying that there's nothing to worry about, he won't do anything to me without voicing it out. I know he won't do anything, nor will I. My mind is playing with me by making all kinds of absurd stuff in my head. That happens to make me more insecure for some unascertained reasons.

"I'll sleep on the couch. You can have the bed." Says he, walking away. I don't know what happens to me. It's as if I'm being possessed by someone who is anyone but me. "N-no wait!"

"What it is Miyeon?

"This bed is too big for me. You can stay. Stay."

I pretend to scratch my head while looking down at my feet, but I can feel his face lighting up. "You sure?" I nod. "Okay. Thanks." The corners of his eyes crinkles as he smiles.

I hope I won't regret it.

***

Since there is only one bathroom, we take turns to get cleaned up. I go first. For 30 minutes, all I do is stand under the hot shower. When I'm stressed, I find a hot shower oddly comforting. All my stress seems to wash away along with the dirt on my skin in a matter of moments.

However, I'm puzzled. I ask myself as I squeeze out some shampoo. "What exactly am I stressed about?" I feel like I'm traveling by a train, but I have no clue from where this train came from or where it is heading to.

I'm not certain if I know where I want to head either.

"I'm stressed about everything." I murmur to myself.

I can't just stop thinking about him and pretend like nothing has happened between us. A lot has happened.

A lot.

Until that night, my world used to revolve around him. And now it's wrecked into nothing within a minute and half by him.

One and half minute is all it takes to destroy someone to the core.

It's so cruel. So cruel.

I find it oppressively abysmal how it took him only one and half minute to shatter my heart into thousands of pieces, while it'll very likely take an eternity for me to collect those fragments again and rebuilt it into what it was before.

You're cruel Mingyu. So so cruel.

"You alive out there?" Wonwoo's voice startles me. It's so close and clear. For a moment, I thought he was right beside me.