Little Love Letters

Chapter fifteen.

A/N

I've decided to give you an idea about the cast. Holland Roden's hair is chestnut, and she really has similarities to Elle's character.

Zachary is Austin Butler. Blonde hair and blue eyes.

And lastly, Luke is Dylan O'Brien.

I've put up a picture of Elle. I will continue to put up pictures of the cast members at each chapter.

I hope you enjoy this one, and I hope you had one Merry elfing Christmas.
+++

I've been avoiding the whole world since I've arrived in New York.

Luke left me on the spot with a decision I can't make at the moment, so to avoid any awkwardness, I avoid him. When he is in the apartment, I bolt towards my room and stay there till I know he has left.

Ally hasn't spoken to me much, either. We haven't been that close anymore, and we are drifting apart drastically.

I still haven't phoned my mom about Tobias. I find it really hard to press the call button. She has left me a few messages, but I don't have the gut to reply.

And lastly, Zac.

I can't tell you how many roses he has left outside my door.

First he called, but I didn't answer. Then he started knocking on the front door, I didn't open it.

And now, to try and change my mind, he sends me roses every hour. Every hour.

Somebody delivers them from a flower shop. They literally stand in rows in the living room. I can't open the cards on each one, because I don't have the strength.

I'm afraid if I do, I'll go back to him for the fourth time. And if the fourth time wasn't a sign for us to not be together, then I don't know what is.

"You should open those cards." Ally collapsed on the couch in front of the television. "I also wonder why the cards have been numbered. It's like he wants you to see how many flowers he is willing to send. It's the flower shop's lucky day." She seemed puzzled as she looked over the bouquets.

"I'm afraid, Ally. I don't know if I could go through with this. With us. Again." I said while opening the card, hesitating at first.

It read, 'Remember C? Oh Elle, I'd play your secret admirer all over again for you to come back to me.' I gasped while ripping open the envelope of card two. It said, 'Remember the balloons at your locker? The graffiti in the alley behind the school?'

Ally looked at me again, "And?"

"Well, he is reminding me of the things he did as C. I wonder if he is trying to show me everything we've been through and what we've had, or something?" I look at her really confused.

Ally stood up and began opening each card with me. Some of them just had single letters on them, which we gathered in order. Some of the cards were apologies. He said sorry for everything he has ever done wrong in our relationship. Even for not putting milk in my coffee, and accidently ripping off the teddy bear's arm,which he sent me on Valentines day a few years back.

I was surprised he even remembered some of the hiccups in our relationship. I couldn't help but smile and chuckle at some of our memories.

Card number 22 said, 'And our first kiss. I could never forget the taste of your lips. That picnic was one of my most valuable moments. I can still hear the inhale of your breath when I picked you up and swept your feet from underneath you.'

When we were finally finished, the single letters had all our attention. We arranged them, and they spelt 'I'M SORRY'

"I think you should at least call him. He deserves a chance to explain, don't you think?" Ally said while smelling one of the roses.

"It's just.. I'm so confused, and I'm not going to give in so easily. I know I always say that, but this time I mean it."

Ally nodded and sat on the couch, while I targeted one of the cushions on the floor.I was glad she didn't push the matter further, "What happened between you and Luke?"

I looked up at her, surprised that she picked it up so easily, "Wha..what do you mean?"

"Luke used to look at you with such love in his eyes. For a while I thought he might have fallen head over heels for you. When I mentioned your name while you were gone, his face lit up like a Christmas tree."

Feeling guilty, I start playing with my fingers. I couldn't make eye contact with her. "When he visited today and I asked him about you, he seemed sad. Like he lost something. When you ran upstairs when he said hey to you, it was like my own heart shattered. You have to talk to him too. You can't always aviod your problems.''

After she finished speaking, tears appeared again.

She englufed me in a strong hug, while I got tears on her shoulders.

When our embrace was over, I started mumbling through the tears, "He told me that he was in love with me, and I couldn't say anything back. I'm torn, and I don't see how two great people could like me at the same time. I feel horrible, and I just don't know what to do."

"Elle, I know you need space and you deserve it too, but don't take too long. Make your decision, even if it isn't one of them. And, do you really want to lose Zac? You guys have been together for almost five years. Or does it feel like you need to move on. Zac seems toxic to you, but let's think this through completely. We should make a pro and con list of both of them." Before I knew it, Ally grabbed a pen and paper and sat Indie style in front of me while wiping of my tears.

"You just have to tell me them, and I'll write," Her smile calmed me down completely.

"Well, Zac, oh my his smile. And his face. His blue blue eyes. His voice. His kisses, and his touch. He has abs, which count a lot. He has a bright future, and he became very smart. I wouldn't mind marrying him.."

"Okay okay, slow down a bit. And his cons?" Ally said while writing furiously fast.

"He breaks my heart so much, and he isn't so loyal. He kinda brings me down all the time, like when he doesn't talk to me and I get sad thinking that I irritate him. He rushes into things a lot."

I only heard the pen meeting the paper for a few seconds before Ally asked about Luke. "And Luke?"

"Luke is so sincere, and he respects me a lot. He has a heart of gold, and he makes me laugh so much,"

A million aspects flooded to my mind. "He wouldn't just break my heart, and he is gorgeous too. I've only started noticing that now. His smile brings butterflies to my stomach, and sometimes I just wanted to kiss him but I always thought about Zac, and that wasn't fair to him."

"He has this dent by both his cheeks, like his jaw is too sharp. And I always want to drag my hands through his fringe. I also like his fashion sence. And I get lost in his eyes."

"I get lost in yours, too." I literally jumped up and spotted Luke standing against the doorframe to the living room, with his arms crossed. "Luke.. you weren't supposed to hear that." I blushed as he walked closer.

"But I did, and I got all the answers that I need to know that we fit Elle. I heard what you said about Zac too, and I would never break you four times. I could never be toxic to you, and I will always talk to you.."

"I think I'm gonna go now." Ally stood up and gave me a thumbs up before she left.

Luke placed his fingers under my chin, forcing me to look at him. "I wouldn't ever need to send you so many flowers, or pretend to be someone else just to talk to you. Because I would never hurt something so delecate and beautiful."

And then Luke kissed me.