ROXY

WHAT I DIDNT DO (2/2)

29

WHAT I DIDNT DO (2/2)
(ALT NAME: CLOSE CALL)

ROXANNE'S POV

IVE been in the same position since Leo left, laying on my couch feeling useless, my mind not remembering anything except for over and over again thinking about Leo and how Dave will come over.

But maybe I deserve it... whatever he does to me.

If I'm not beautiful nobody will love me, I mean nobody loves me now! I don't have a dad and I got two chances... what's wrong with me?

What's so wrong with me that somebody had to convince my mother to love me?

What's so wrong that I deserved to fall in love with somebody who would hurt me this much... when I thought I could trust him the most..

What's so wrong with me that he would leave me? Just like everybody else.

I don't even know what I did. It must've been worth it.. Leo doesn't get angry at me very easily.

That's when the door opens and I hear the grumble of a drunk Dave and I no longer want this for myself. I'm scared... scared to death of how I will die in the next few minutes.

I didn't wanna die..

I wanted to see him again. See his smile, see the way his arms flex when he writes his name on his assignments or how he stares at any guy who talks to me. See his protectiveness over Rose and how he tries to convince Reed to make a move because of how much he hates Haze.

I dont care if he hurt me.. I still wanna see him. I still wanna see him and hope to find some piece of regret in his eyes.

But some sick.. twisted part of me hopes that if I did die.. he would finally realize he loved me.. see what he did wrong..

He probably wouldn't even care though. He hates me.

I'm not enough for him...

I knew it.

Dave grumbles incoherent words, all the lights in the house off as I cover my mouth. "Be still and silent" is on repeat in my head.

But if he moves towards me I can't do anything. And as soon as Dave sees me around the couch, he growls and lunges towards me.

His dark circles are large and his clothes are practically covered in all of his own bodily fluids. I scream, moving into the couch cushions for protection but it doesn't give me any.

He rips my face from between the cushions and immediately punches me. "You ruined my life!" He scream and I spit on him, "You ruined mine!"

I didn't care to hold back. I didn't have much of a reason to. I wanted to be mean. He wouldn't stop what he was doing if I was nice.

His nose twitches in anger before he holds me by my neck, strangling me as I gasp for air. "You little bitch...!" He says this, but then gets this look on his face.... he smirks evilly and despite how much it hurt me I wish I was with Leo. I wish I was replaying that moment over and over again in my head, seeing his evil smirk. Because at least I know that Leo wouldn't hurt me... at least physically I guess, "You're gonna be useful for something!" He screams, holding me down as I struggle but I'm too weak. I always had... him to save me.

I scream for help but he covers my mouth instead, barely giving me room to breathe through my nose, not caring if I die as he pulls down my shorts with his free hand.

"what are you doing! stop! stop!" I scream against his hands but it does nothing, barely reaching anybody's ears. I squirm as he growls again. "You're only gonna be useful for one thing in your life. So stop struggling. You're were asking for it in these shorts you little bitch."