Chapter 49

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My eyes fly open, my breathing heavy from my dream or I should say nightmare. I sit up quickly, looking over at Jax who's still sleeping but his heart monitor is still going steady. The scene from hours before playing in my dream with Jax lying on the floor in a pool of blood and not waking up as he slowly dies there. It shifts to the hospital where they try to revive him, but they can't, the bullet killing him and also heavy blood loss. The last scene from my dream is Wren and I standing in front of his tombstone in the rain, the loss of him so raw. 

I look down to see Wren still asleep, curled up underneath his blanket with a peaceful look on his face. Slowly so I don't disturb him I get up from the bed and walk over to Jax's bed, the cold tiles against my feet waking me up. My eyes look around the room and notice Cody is nowhere in sight but there is a piece of paper lying by Jax's head. If you wake up and I'm still not back I've gone for a walk. 

"You could have woken me up," I mumble aloud to myself as I continue reading the note. P.s I tried waking you up but I forgot what you become if you lose sleep, thanks for the punch to the gut sis. I let out a huff of amusement because he's not lying that I apparently do become a monster if I lose sleep. Growing up my family always took a rotation of waking me up because it was a lot to handle, a hundred-twenty-pound half-asleep teenager that would kick anyone's ass when waking up.

I gaze back at Jax, and I lift his hand, threading our fingers so they're clasped together. I get up from the seat and sit down on the bed so I'm facing him, my other hand stroking his cheek. I can feel the slight stubble growing on his face as the hairs prick my finger.

"You know, I was honestly terrified when they came to the house and that feeling wasn't for myself. I was terrified for Wren. I knew that even if this gave me trauma, I didn't want him to have another painful set of memories like before, I didn't want him to hurt anymore," I whisper, finding it calming to talk even if he's not awake. 

"This takes me back to a couple of months ago except we were in different positions. At first, I thought you were going to be a scary and overbearing man, you did make me sit on your lap the first night in the hospital," I chuckle thinking back to our disagreement of the only chair in the room. "Plus you were insistent we share a room together when you moved in."

"But then you did turn out to be scary but you were also incredibly sweet, caring, sometimes cocky, and protective. Maybe that's why I started to fall for you, and even if you had a colourful past, it didn't matter to me because I saw you for you. I got to know the present Jax and see he's regretful of his mistakes, cares for his younger brother, and cares for me,"  I tell him softly, my thumb brushing under his eyelid.

"I also love how you respect me as a woman, always listening to my opinions, never shutting me out, treating me as an equal. Honestly, if you didn't you'd be sitting on the curb by now. Now here we are, you asleep in the hospital, Wren in dreamland, and me here wondering when you'll wake up. I can't wait to properly tell you that we're having twins, I guess their dad knows best," I chuckle, wiping my eyes and my cheeks, not even realizing I was tearing up while talking.

"Damn right he does," a hoarse voice replies. My hands freeze mid-swipe and it lowers as I stare in shock at a weak smirking but awake Jax. This time I let the tears fall as I drop my head onto his chest, sobs shaking through my body. "I'm so sorry angel," he says in a broken voice as his hand rests on my head. 

"You fucking died. You died twice when they were operating on you," I wail as the words from the nurse earlier flash through my mind.

"I'm so sorry angel, I swear you'll never have to go through this again," he tells me. I lift my head as I'm hovering over him, my eyes locked on his.

𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐄𝐱-𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐯𝐢𝐜𝐭 (𝟏𝟖+) 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐋𝐄𝐓𝐄𝐃 ✓Where stories live. Discover now