I DON'T. [harvey mills]

Thirty Seven.

As I'm going out of school with Arya, Greyson and Ashton, we see Harvey. He's holding some flowers, he sees me, and I smile at him.

"Aw look at that! He brought you flowers, Morgan!", Arya says smiling.

"Oh my god, that's so cute", Ashton sarcastically says. We all give him a dirty look, and he takes it back, "I'm kidding, I'm kidding. It's cute. It really is"

Greyson approaches Harvey, says hey, high fives him and gives him that bro hug guys do, and then Ashton does the same.

"You better treat my girl Morgan well, or else", he says jokingly threatening him, "I'm playing, I've been a Morvey shipper from the start, I'm so happy for you guys", he tells him, giving him a hug.

"Morvey?", Harvey laughs.

"It's a ship name I made for the two of you... a long time ago"

"He's weird, you'll get used to it.", Ashton says.

"Oh yeah, totally, because... you date our friend, you date us too"

Harvey looks at them like he's kind of creeped out, but then jokingly tells them, "of course, cuties".  They all laugh.

"We're also kidding about that, don't worry", Greyson says.

Harvey keeps glancing at me, so I say: "guys, can I say hi to my boyfriend?"

I still can't believe I'm calling Harvey my boyfriend. I never in a billion years would've seen that happening. 

They look at me like they had completely forgotten I was there, and then back off  "oh, yeah, of course"

I go up to Harvey and hug him tightly, he then grabs my face and kisses me.

"Morgan, Morgan...", Arya mutters insistently, but I ignore her. "Morgan", she says a little louder.

"What?", I respond, kind of annoyed. I turn around and see Emily walking our way. Oh my god, it's Emily. I had completely forgotten about Emily! We make eye contact and she slows down her pace, —probably realizing who I'm with—, she frowns at me and then goes the other way as fast as she can.

I see her as she leaves. I don't even know what to do? Should I go after her or not? I mean, to be honest, what do I even have to apologize for? For dating the guy that was supposed to be with me from the start? For having him actually like me?

Harvey's telling me something while he holds my hands but I bet he can tell I'm getting distracted. He knows my attention is now elsewhere. He touches the side of my face and asks, "hey, what's wrong?"

I look at my friends to see if they'd give me an idea of what to say, but they're all trying not to make eye contact with me. I can tell they find this awkward, and it is. "Oh, it's nothing"

•••

Morgan
Hey

Emily
Hi

Morgan 
You seemed a little angry when you saw me after school today

Emily
No, I'm fine

Morgan
Are you sure?
I don't want that to ruin our friendship in any way

Emily
No, it's fine
I promise

•••

Last night, I asked Emily if she was okay after she saw me and Harvey kissing outside of school and she said she was, but she's obviously not. I don't know why I even believed her in the first place when it was more than obvious that she wouldn't be okay with it and I know she isn't because she's been avoiding me all day. But she's sitting next to me in class, and it seems like the perfect opportunity to get her to talk to me.

"Emily", I mutter.

"What?", she asks without looking at me.

"Look, I know you probably don't want to talk to me but we have to fix this. We have to talk" She doesn't say anything, so I insist, "please".

"Fine, we'll talk after class"

•••

"Hey", I say to her as we walk out of the room. "Listen, I don't want you to be mad at me"

"But how could I not?"

"What do you mean?", I ask.

I know exactly what bothers her. She always said she wanted me to be happy and all but there's something interesting about this. Most people want their loved ones to be happy only as long as it doesn't interfere with their own happiness. So of course, she's mad at me because I'm happy with who she would've wanted to be happy with. But am I really wrong for doing what I'm doing? Am I being selfish? Or am I simply trying to take advantage of the situation and be happy?

"You're dating my ex", she says.

Sure, her ex with who I had something going on before she even found him attractive.

"Well-"

"And that's not even the worst part. The worst part is that you lied to me", she interrupts.

"What about?"

"You said you wouldn't date Harvey after what he did to me"

"Yeah, but-"

"But what?", she desperately asks. I don't think I had ever seen her that hurt before.

"You broke up with him so he could be with me"

"First of all, where the hell did you hear that? And second, that's not what happened"

"Uh... I was there. I heard you"

She crosses her arms, "You were spying on us?"

"What makes you think that? Why would I-"

"I don't know, you tell me"

"I was not spying on you. I was there because I live there and simply happened to be there", I say remarking every word.

"Oh, right... then... you still understood wrong"

"Why?"

"I didn't break up with Harvey so he could be with you. I broke up with him because I wanted to see if he'd run to you since you were all he would talk about. I wanted to see if he'd do anything to try to change my mind, but he didn't. He actually just ran after you, and what is even worse, you also went after him. Even after you knew how I felt about him"