I DON'T. [harvey mills]

Eighteen.

Jordyn crosses her arms and says, "Chances are he was just trying to cover it up, Morgan. Like, honestly, you can tell he's in love with you"

I look over at him, Mason's gone and Emily is back. And then I look back at Jordyn, "maybe you're right"

"But do you really believe so?", Ashton asks looking kinda shocked.

"What do you mean?"

He only points at them, I turn around and see them kissing. I had actually never seen them kissing before so... WHAT THE HELL? No, no, no, no, no. I don't like this.

"Oh wow, uh... I think... I need some air". I run into the restrooms and look at myself in the mirror for some minutes, breathing in and out, trying to think things through, when Emily comes in.

"Hey, I saw you coming in and just thought I'd tell you that-", she covers her mouth like she's hella excited. "Harvey is the absolute best."

"Yeah, yeah. I know. He's great..."

"And he'd make a great boyfriend for sure"

"Yeah, he would." I zone out for a bit thinking about what it'd be like to have him as my boyfriend. We'd go out on dates and joke around and laugh at what each other is saying, and we'd also annoy each other all the time, kinda like a best friend. But we'd also be holding hands at the movies, kissing every now and then. He'd say anything to try to make me smile, but he wouldn't really have to try cause I'd be simply happy by being with him, and then, at the end of the day he'd kiss me goodnight. Hold on, what the hell are my thoughts doing to me? They're driving me crazy.

"What is it that's been bothering you lately? Why have you been acting like this?"

But of course, I'm the type of person who would rather hide her feelings to avoid any type of conflict with anybody. I don't want to hurt Emily, so I'm hurting myself instead. "It's nothing... I'll explain later. I just really need to be alone for a bit"

"Okay, then. Tell me if you need someone to talk to", she says and leaves.

Either way, who kissed who? Chances are, she was the one to kiss him and then he simply didn't want to make her feel bad... I guess. Yeah, she most likely was the one to kiss him and he really didn't even like it that much. But maybe if he hadn't liked it he would've backed off, wouldn't he? Maybe he did like it. Maybe he liked it and that's why he didn't back off... maybe he enjoyed it. Maybe he was the one who kissed her in the first place. Maybe he's just really over me and likes her now. Maybe if he were still into me he wouldn't have come with her. And either way, why am I still doubting that he doesn't like me? After all, didn't he tell Mason that? Maybe I should move on as well.

•••

Harvey
I need to talk to you
wanna come over?

Morgan
What about?

Honestly, I don't feel at all excited about talking to him. I bet what he wants to tell me is about Emily, and no, I don't wanna know anymore.

Morgan
Maybe you can say it over text?

Harvey
No
just come
please

I go to his apartment and he looks at me, looking nervous. He keeps walking from one side of the room to the other, restlessly. He scratches his neck and lets out a nervous laugh, which, yeah, you guessed, it's making me even more nervous. He finally says, "I... I don't know why it's making me so nervous to talk to you about this"

"Let me guess, it's about Emily and you, isn't it? You guys are like... official?"

He looks confused, "what? No. What would make you think that?"

"I don't know... you two just seem to be so excited about being together, so I just figured..."

"Well, no. It's not about that. It's about that one thing you were gonna tell me about a week ago... at prom?"

"What?"

"You were gonna say something to me at prom the other day, which you looked kinda nervous about, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it"

"I was gonna say something?", I ask pretending not to know what he means. "I don't think I remember"

"Come on, Morgan, I know you do."

"No, I don't"

"Morgan..."

"I don't know what you're talking about"

"Come on, just say it!", he says giving a step forward, getting kinda a bit too close to me. I take a really deep breath. He takes a step back. "Say it."

"Okay, fine. I just thought we'd go to prom together. I thought you'd invite me to go with you or something..."

"Why would I do that?"

Ouch. I gulp and look down to avoid eye contact, "Because we're friends? I don't know... I just thought... like, even if it had been only as friends, like it didn't even have to be a real date, you know? But you went with Emily, that's okay too", I shrug.

"It's just prom", he chuckles, "that doesn't mean we're not friends"

"Just prom?"

"You really wanted me to go with you, huh? Why?"

"I mean, it's not like I 'really' wanted you to come with me but-"

"But you got jealous because you like me and I took someone else"

"I didn't say that"

"But you definitely are!", he takes a step forward and puts his hand on my cheek. He leans in, getting closer and closer to my lips. "Come on, just kiss me", he says. I don't dare to move a muscle, but then he backs off and looks me in the eye, "hold on, what's going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"You didn't move"

"So?"

"Why didn't you move?"

I take another deep breath and finally dare to say, "You wanna know the truth?", he nods. "I like you"

>>>

Oof, little cliffhanger for y'all.