I DON'T. [harvey mills]

Eleven.

"Harvey is special, he really is. I can't believe you don't think the same way. But I'm also glad you don't. I'd feel like a bad friend if you did" Emily tells me while I have my eyes fixed at the wall. She waves a hand in front of me, but I don't react to that. "Hello? Earth to Morgan"

"Why did you break up with Bryce?"

"It wasn't working"

"No, be honest" I demand.

She raises her perfect brows and gives me a small smile as if she were congratulating me for finding out that she was lying "fine, Harvey caught my eye. And... it's weird. I don't usually fall for guys like Harvey but it makes me happy talking to him. We text everyday-"

"You two are a thing?"

"No... not yet."

"Do you guys want to become a thing?"

"I'd like to. I don't know how he feels about me, though"

I can't believe my ears, Emily caught feelings for a guy and not the other way around, for the first time. And it had to be this one guy. I wish I had told her I liked him. But I bet, I bet he's not over me.

"Oh" I respond with a straight face.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah. Why wouldn't I be?" I say faking a smile.

•••

"Morgan, hey" Bryce says "listen, I'm sorry about the party the other day. I got drunk... and I actually wanted to take you home or something... but things got a little out of hand... so I'm sorry about that. But listen, how about we go out on Friday?"

I nod, "okay", I smile.

Another date with Bryce? What is it, Christmas? But also, Harvey hasn't talked to me since that thing a week ago. But I have what I wanted. I have Bryce. I have to stick to that. I'll let Emily have Harvey if she wants, but I still want him to be my friend. I don't want him away from me.

•••

I get home and I decide to go talk to Harvey, so I go to his apartment and knock on the door. He opens it and doesn't look really happy.

"Hold up" He says and then disappears. When he comes back, I see he has my hoodie in his hand. "Here. You left it here the other day, if that's what you came here for"

I grab it, "thanks." I chuckle, "I hadn't even... noticed it missing."

"It's fine" he tells me with a straight face.

"But actually... I came here to talk to you.

"About?"

"Well... I was just wondering... do you like Emily? Like, do you have feelings for her?"

"Yeah... why not?"

"You don't sound really convinced"

"Oh, I am". He looks so serious, yet like he's pretending. "And I'm actually kinda running late... I'm going on a date with her..."

"You are? Where are you going?"

"Are you sure you are not like obsessed with me or something? Because you sure sound like it"

I roll my eyes "I'm not obsessed. I was just wondering. That's all...", there's an awkward silence. "Listen, I... am so sorry about everything that happened the other day. You were trying to protect me and I was nothing but rude to you. I am so sorry"

"Okay. It's fine... I just really should... hurry up or I'll get there late"

Then, something makes me give him a kiss on the cheek after saying "okay, goodbye". Why did I just do that? I go back into my apartment and run into my room and press my face against my pillow. I can't stop picturing them kissing and holding hands... I cringe at the thought. It definitely doesn't make me happy.

"Mae" I shout from my room.

"What's up?"

"I just gave Harvey a kiss on the cheek when I said goodbye and I don't know why I did it. It was so... embarrassing. I don't know what drove me to do it."

"First of all, that's no biggie, so don't exaggerate. Second, I told you"

"What do you mean?"

"You like him"

"No, I don't"

"Yes, there's no doubt about it. You like him"

"No"

"Why were you over there anyhow?"

I hesitate, "I only wanted to ask him something..."

"Morgan..."

"Fine, I went over to ask him if he felt anything for Emily"

"And why did you do that?"

I press the pillow against my face once more, "I don't know!"

"Because you like him! Why do you keep denying it?"

"I'm not trying to... but you know how I thought I liked Mason and I really didn't. What if this is the same thing?"

"You were confused... it's okay. Everyone has those moments. You should really open up to the possibility that this time you might actually like him."

•••

I see Emily while we're in the hallway. She's talking to her friends and they're all freaking out about whatever she's telling them. It's obviously about Harvey. Damn.

"Why the long face, Morgan?", Arya asks me.

"No reason..."

"Sure. Now, tell us what's wrong" she insists.

Both, Arya and Jordyn look at me, I press my lips together, "Have you ever made a mistake like thinking you like someone when you actually don't?"

"Like it happened with Mason" Jordyn says.

I nod, "Aha. Well... this is exactly the other way around... I might have thought I didn't have feelings for someone I actually had feelings for..."

"Who are you talking about?"

"My neighbor. Remember?"

"Harvey?" Jordyn asks

"Yeah... but I think he likes Emily... so it's whatever, honestly"

Arya looks at me with a confused expression on her face, "But weren't you in love with Bryce? You'd told us you two were even going out and stuff"

"I'm confused. Part of me loves being with Bryce, but I somehow can't manage to stop thinking about Harvey when I'm with him..."

"I'm sorry, but what is it that you're confused about?", Jordyn chuckles, "if you're with one guy and can't stop thinking about another one, then you probably like the second guy better, because you wouldn't be thinking about him if the first one were enough"

"She's more than right. You like Harvey, he likes you too. Go for it."