ab initio, ad infinitum

space.

WELCOME TO THE FIRST ENTRY. I decided to start with this one, simply because it's the first one I wrote and can hopefully? ease you into the Garggie Rants ^TM style. Either way, this is definitely one of the more tangent-less ones (you will realize just what that means in a sec) so, bear with me? and thank you so much for reading. (also this is v swear-y, so i dunno what i was so mad about XD)  do good, be kind. <3

S P A C E .

Space is something that'll never cease to amaze me. The sheer vastness and the beauty that surrounds us. How we are so small, compared to a universe that's so big. With it comes the wonder of how it came to be; the curiosity of how the eons had passed before us. But the most beautiful part to me, are those pictures that come back to us. Not just shadows and darkness lit up by stunning colour and brightness, but the knowledge that something so much greater is out there. Because on Earth, sometimes I feel confined. They say there's nothing new under the burning sun here on this planet, but there's so much more beyond the burning sun. There are thousands of stars very much like our own; there is so much happening that we only get to see years after it had occurred.

Before even moving on to different solar systems; the planets that we are so familiar with in our own solar system amazes me. Hell, Earth amazes me, so how am I supposed to feel about Saturn? About rings that span millions of miles? About moons bigger than our planet- than the one thing that holds everything that is tangible to me? It's so fucking crazy.

There's so much. So very much. And it makes my stomach clench, and my toes curl, just to even think about it. There are things that can be so overwhelmingly large that it escapes the confines of my limitless imagination. It makes my heart stutter, and causes my lungs to sing when I realize that saying that 'there's world out there' isn't even close to just what is out beyond the horizon.

Because while I might not be new to this world or galaxy, this life is new to me, and I know that no other person that walks upon this earth will ever map out the galaxy on the backs of their palms the same way as me, because there is so much. For a race of creatures that have fought fucking wars over tangible things to get more more more, we virtually could have more than possibly needed for each person on this earth, and still have the rest of the universe left over.

Space is something to explore, and observe. To stand and watch the beauty of our life amplified by the echoes of empty space. As you gaze up at the night sky, who fucking cares if there are other intelligent forms of life out there, because we know that we exist, and in the moment that you breathe the same air as pterodactyls millennia ago, you feel so damn lucky to be part of this. So you take out your blessings and count them with a kiss of a smile crowning each number, holding them close to your heart as your eyes try to soak in the wonder that you are part of.

Life can fucking suck, but when I look up to the sky and just think of all that lies beyond the constellations that I've imprinted to the backs of my eyelids, I'm thankful for what I have. I am thankful for being cursed with the burden for having lived and loved and lost, because honestly, what else do I have? What do I have to not be thankful for, when I get to witness the magnificence of the stars flickering in the endless dark of the universe, things that could be phantoms of lives long past for all I know?

What do I have not to be thankful for, when I live among people that have dared venture into the unknown, when I know how a life is happening parallel to my own? When I have seen the stunning, breath-taking beauty all around me, what do I have to not feel so incomparably lucky?

I am human. My heart sometimes is nothing but a mat to be left on the floor by the door for strangers to come in and wipe their feet on. My heart sometimes is torn in places that I can never quite fill. My heart sometimes is an empty vessel, space waiting to be filled. Sometimes, my heart is a void that can never be filled up. But if there's anything that space taught me, it's that dark matter was meant to be ventured out into. To be explored. That that void inside me, is there so I can discover the stars that light up the area. Space taught me that sometimes, emptiness is beautiful.

That space in my heart?-it's beautiful. The gaps between my fingers that never allow me to hold all that I want?- it's beautiful. That darkness that lines my eyes?- it's beautiful. Because that space in my heart allows me to amplify every damn thing I feel. Because those gaps remind me that if I want to have everything that I wish for, I sure as hell better fight for it. Because that darkness allows the constellations in my eyes to shine brighter than any fucking supernova ever known to our kind.

Space. So fucking beautiful.

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