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LANA Heeey you I'm sorry I haven't replied to your messages I landed a few hours ago, it's been hectic
ROBERT No problem, good to hear you're back home 😊 How was the flight?
LANA Exhausting tbh Nolan was all over the place, poor baby he's never been on such a long flight before But thank God he fell asleep as soon as we got to my parents' house
ROBERT Is that where you'll be staying?
LANA For now yes Marjani booked a hotel suite But my parents insisted Nolan and I stay with them They haven't seen their grandson in a long time, can't blame them
ROBERT That's good to hear You must be exhausted though I'll leave you to it
LANA Oh no it's fine I'm not that tired But you know what I'm kinda sick of typing
ROBERT Do you want to facetime?
LANA Wait let me get to the balcony I don't want to wake up Nolan
* Now Calling: ROBERT *
"Hi"
"Hi." [chuckles]
"What's so funny?"
"Looks like you've been hit by a truck"
"Your flattery game is on point, as usual" [laugh] "Nice to see you too."
"I mean the bags are down to your chin Lana, are you sure you're not too tired?"
"Nooo I'm telling you it's fine."
"If you say so." [shrugs]
"Enough about me. How's your break been so far?"
"All three days of it? Oh glorious."
"Lots of sleeping in, I imagine?"
"Definitely," [smiles] "I can finally spend quality time with my daughter too. You know, making up for being so busy these last few weeks..."
[smiles] "How is the little princess doing?"
[eyes lightening up] "She's good. She keeps asking about Nolan, it's adorable."
[chuckles] "Can you believe how well they've been getting along?"
"Probably because Nolan's always willing to get into whatever trouble Avri cooks up."
[laugh] "Your little girl is hilarious, I'll give her that."
"Yeah..." [face falls a little] "Makes me sad to see how hard she tries... She really shouldn't have to."
"What do you mean?"
[sigh] "I don't know..." [pause] "I mean... Do you ever wonder how bad we're messing up our kids?"
"Woah... okay, I didn't realise we were having this type of conversation."
"Sorry it's just... nevermind. Forget I said anything."
"Hey no, I want to hear it. I'm only saying it's surprising coming from you. Why are you saying this?"
"I don't know I guess... Sometimes I think about the divorce and how busy I am all the time and the... [long pause] addiction... and I wonder what effect that's gonna have on Avri in the long term."
"Honestly? Those are the things that keep me up at night... But I don't know why you're so worried. I've seen you with her, Robert. That little girl is clearly your entire world. And she knows she is loved."
[smiles] "I could tell you the same thing."
"Yeah, except... there's always my ex-husband. I've tried to have a respectful divorce, you know? He just refuses to be civil with me. Not even for Nolan's sake."
"But that's on him. You can't beat yourself up about it."
[sad smile] "I appreciate you saying that but I'm past the point of blaming him for all my problems. I've had a hand in it as well... and not a small one at that."
"Because of the addiction?"
"Yeah... he just doesn't trust me, and I can't fully blame him."
"Cut yourself some slack, you've been sober for 3 years!"
"And I'm terrified of a relapse. You've had one, you know how it is!"
[face falls] "The idea is to move past it, you know."
[long pause] "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to rub it in your face."
"I know."
[sigh] "Here we go... Projecting my anxieties again."
[shakes his head] "Lana, it's fine. I get it."
"Yeah. You're the only one that does, to be honest."
[smirk] "Because I'm just as fucked up as you?"
"Oh definitely" [cracks a smile] "I'd say we got a little club going on."
"The Fucked Up Club... it has a nice ring to it."
[laughs] "We should get it copyrighted ay?"
[long pause] "Jokes aside, Lana..."
"Yeah?"
"Do you think you'll tell your kid about your addiction someday?"
"I think about it all the time... I don't know... Will you?"
"I think I will. If only as a cautionary tale."
"They'll never look at us the same way though."
"I know... but at least they'll understand the reality of it. They'll know you can get out, rebuild yourself. Better than painting a rosy picture."
"I guess..." [yawn]
[smiles] "Still not tired?"
"I'm starting to have a hard time keeping my eyes open, to be honest." [tired smile]
[chuckles] "I think you should go to bed."
"I think so too... but I'm glad we had this conversation Robert. You're the only one I can talk to about these things."
