I Won't Give Up (A Big Time Rush Fanfiction)

Matchmaker

Here's that new chapter! I started school this last week, so I didn't have a lot of time to write, but yep, here it is! Hope you enjoy :) xoxoxo, Brooke

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CARLOS' POV

I was so happy that James and Jade's little ones arrived safely. I mean, sure, they weren't completely healthy, but there was hope for them. Now, I was just standing in front of the viewing window in the NICU, watching James interact with their newborn son. He was doing such an amazing job at this so far. I wasn't sure if I could ever handle something like this. It sucked thinking that way because...because I hated not being able to handle things.

Slowly, I reached for the door, pushing it open and walking into the dimly lit room.

"Hey, little guy." James cooed to Baby B, or Avery. The little baby moved his tiny arms, staring at his father, while James turned to Tristan and stroked his hand. I could only watch him at first, feeling both pride and sadness. James had been my best friend for a year now and I was already losing him, and everyone else that meant something to me.

"They're so cute." I finally said, walking closer.

"Hey, where've you been?" James frowned, still allowing Tristan and Avery to each wrap a tiny hand around his finger. Oh yeah, definitely the cutest thing I'd ever seen.

"Just walking around." I said, pulling up a chair. We both fell silent then and I focused on just admiring the two adorable little ones that my best friends created. Even premature, they were beautiful. I wanted kids someday too, but why did I have a feeling it wouldn't be with Stephanie? She was so busy all the time and we'd never gotten a chance to control our relationship.

"Oh, um..." He glanced at me, then looked down at the floor. "Walking is good. Hehehe, i-it's healthy, I've heard."

"Yeah." I murmured, although I wasn't walking for my health. I just needed time to think. I'd spent a lot of time thinking about life and death, and whether I even wanted to leave. Now, looking at those little babies? I didn't want to die. I wanted to live and be a part of Tristan and Avery's lives. I never wanted to leave.

"You can stick your hand through one of these and actually touch them." James said, pointing to two openings on each side of their incubators.

So, I reached through one of the openings and let my finger gently brush Tristan's other hand. He moved his arms and I watched in amazement and he looked my way. I couldn't believe that they actually noticed me, but they certainly seemed to. In fact, if I looked closely enough, I was sure I could see a hint of happiness in Tristan's eyes.

"The nurse said that they're surprising everyone in the NICU." He told me, grinning as he stroked Tristan's foot. "They're doing a lot better than most preemies do."

"Well, they have two very strong people for parents." I smiled, reaching into the other incubator and touching Avery's hands. The youngest of the twins let out a tiny yawn, his eyes remaining shut. I just couldn't hold back a smile, and it felt amazing to interact with him, and feel the first bit of true happiness I'd felt in a while.

"Well, we're both trying our best." James whispered, his eyes glued to Tristan. "Man, I can't believe I'm actually here today, staring at my children. I mean, just think, a few months ago, I was in the hospital with cancer, and now I'm a dad to two amazing little boys." He chuckled as Tristan whimpered. "Yes, buddy, I'm talking about you and your brother. Because mommy and I are just so proud of you guys!" He stuck out his tongue, chuckling.

"You're doing amazing at this." I murmured, watching my best friend.

James nodded, staring at the ground. "I...I'm trying." I heard him sniffle and watched as he wiped a tear from the corner of his eye.