Wings

June 28, 2013

I was woken up by the sound of my phone ringing. I grabbed it, looking at the caller ID. Adam Bretter. I got an uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, and clicked answer. "Hello?" I whispered wearily.

"Sydney," a crying voice said on the other end. It was a girl's voice.

I sat straight up in bed. "Lindsay? What happened?"

"It's Adam, Sydney." My blood ran cold. "We're at the hospital."

Every inch of my body goes into shock. "What?"

Lindsay continues to sob. "I came into his room and found him passed out. There was a empty pill bottle by him, and I had to drag him downstairs..." She sobbed again, unable to continue.

"I'll be there soon, just hold on." I started sobbing then too, running out of bed and down the stairs. I run out to my car, still in pajamas, and turn the key in the ignition. Nothing. I try again. Still nothing. Still sobbing, I turn th key over and over, slamming my hands on the wheel and screaming. Why is this happening?

I ran back inside, running up the stairs to Zach's room. I burst in the door, shaking him awake.

"Zach, come on, wake up, I need help!" I plead, still crying, trying not to scream.

He wakes up, looking at me groggily. "Syd?" His eyes grew wide at my red and crying face. "What's wrong? What's going on?"

I choke out my words in between sobs. "It's...Adam...he's...at the hospital..."

Zach quickly gets out of bed, putting on a shirt, and we sprint to the car. Luckily there are no cars on the road. The perks of driving at one in the morning.

He pulled up to the hospital, letting me out. I jumped out of the car, sprinting into the hospital. My Toms pound onto the tile floor, the ends of my cardigan flying behind me. I skidded to a stop in front of the reception area, breathlessly shouting. "Bretter, Adam Bretter. I'm here to see Adam Bretter."

The receptionist, a younger woman stares at me, red in the face and still sobbing. "Miss, there's only family allowed-"

"I'm his girlfriend. Please, I'm his girlfriend."

The receptionist opened her mouth to stop me, but an older secretary stops her. "Room 117, sweetie."

I thanked her, then continued to take off down the hallway. I reach his room, and a doctor opened the door for me. The first thing I see is Adam- lifeless in bed. Lindsay and Laura Bretter are there in the room; Lindsay slumped into a chair with her head in her hands, crying, and Laura standing in a stunned silence. They both looked at me, and Lindsay embraces me hard. I sob into her shoulder, my eyes leaving water drops on her shirt. I want to scream. No no no he can't be gone no.

The doctor shut the door behind him, facing me. "Hello, I'm Dr. Reynolds," he said, shaking my hand. He gives me a sympathetic look, putting a hand on my shoulder. "Adam is going to be okay." A huge weight fell off my shoulders. I sunk into a chair in relief. "Although, he did take a lot of pills. It says here that Adam took about 18 doses of Vicodin."

I can't breathe. I thought that he was done. I had been right in my uneasiness about how he would react to the anniversary of Danny's death.

"He did manage to throw some of them up," Dr. Reynolds explains. "However, we did pump his stomach, which helped him a lot. Adam's asleep right now," He says, gesturing to Adam's hospital bed. The love of my life is laying in the small bed, an IV leading into his hand. Monitors show his heart rate nearby, a green line the only indicator that he's still with us. "His heart rate is returning to normal, which is good. We're going to have to keep him for a few days, to monitor how his body is responding to the Narcan drip, give him a psych evaluation, and just to assess how he's doing."

The three of us nodded, dazed, and the doctor leaves with a small smile. I pull my chair next to Adam's bed, taking hold of one of his hands. They're colder than normal, and I hold it with both of mine to warm it up. Lindsay turns the TV on, finding a movie that Adam likes. I sat and stroke his hand for what felt like hours. His dark hair was pressed to his face in a sweaty mass, his chest rising slowly.

Adam's hand moves, and his eyes slowly blink open. His green eyes are vibrant to his pale skin, and his eyebrows knit into a confused line. "Sydney?"

A tear rolled down my cheek. "I'm here, baby."

"You're wearing my pajama pants," he said groggily, forcing a smile on his face.

Lindsay chokes out a sob, and ran over to hug Adam. He rubs her back, murmuring that he's okay. Laura simply stands in silence.

"I'm okay, mom," he smiles. Even when he was in the hospital, Adam still tried to be happy.

Laura stares at him for a long moment, then surprises all of us. "How could you do this?"

The smile slid off of Adam's face as quickly as it appeared. "What?"

"Why would you do this to me, huh? On the anniversary of Danny's death? How could you do this to me?" Laura is shouting now, and Lindsay quickly moved to take her arm.

"Mom-"

"No Lindsay. Adam, I've already lost one son, isn't that enough?" Adam stayed silent. "I SAID, ISN'T THAT ENOUGH? Did the pills take away your speaking abilities?" Laura screams. "YOU'RE JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER."

"MOM!" Lindsay screams. "ENOUGH."

Laura snapped out of it, in shock at what she just said. "My god. Adam-"

Her daughter stepped in front of her, pointing to the door. "Mom, out. Let's go."

Laura looks at Adam, then burst into tears. "I'm so sorry Adam," she said, then left the room.

I looked at Adam. He was simply laying there, his eyelids half open. "She didn't mean it sweetie. She's just scared. I am too."

Adam held out both of his arms, and I crawled onto the hospital bed next to him. He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. It wasn't long before we fell asleep.

All too soon, Dr. Reynolds came in, to tell me that I should go home, visit him in the morning. I refused to move, that's how exhausted I was. Zach came in from the lobby, and lifted me out of bed. Adam was still asleep, but I leaned over and kissed his warm lips.

So this is where I am now. I'm sitting in the lobby at Wyatt General Hospital, waiting for the receptionist to tell me I can go back. I want nothing more to be with him. If I had lost Adam, I don't know what I would do. Last night was the most scared I had ever been. If I know anything now, it's that I can't ever go through this again. I need to get him to stop somehow. Adam can't leave me. He just can't.

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ANOTHER SAD CHAPTER I'M SORRY