Succubus

68- Did angels have a ballsack to punch?

*Oona's POV*

After trying for two days to return to his human form, Andy had been getting exceptionally cranky. He had a ring of dark, ugly bruises around the base of each wing and a smaller one at the base of his tail. It was difficult to watch him fail; I hadn't really been in any situation like this before. I had seen Juliet be supportive previously, as I had watched them through the mirror, but those same words just didn't come easily to me.

It was more in my nature to assume an incubus, as Andy currently appeared to be, wouldn't want attention drawn to anything that amounted to a lack of success; that the most compassionate thing I could do would be to ignore him until he finally triumphed in his endeavors. It was only as I watched Andy from afar, looking frustrated and disheartened, that I remembered not to judge a book by its cover. Especially not that book; Andy was special.

I talked to Andy and we came to realize he felt intense pressure in my presence, to the point of distraction, but he wouldn't even entertain the prospect of me leaving. We both agreed I couldn't return to my home (or anywhere else) in the Underworld until we knew my body had metabolized his angelic energy and broken down his angelic semen. He fussed when I suggested I go elsewhere on the Earthly plane for a while, and he wouldn't settle until I gave that idea up.

I declared I would, at the very least, go for regular walks, and Andy got agitated at even that, fearing for my safety. Reluctantly, I agreed to let Penemue come along with me, so long as he knew how to masquerade as a human adequately, which it turned out he did.

Penemue and I decided to take some currency that Andy offered us and go to the commodity store to buy kitty litter and toilet tissue. I was excited to get out and about! After a brisk walk, the store was very brightly lit, crowded, and colorful! Though I found many things I was interested in buying (very small hot dogs I felt were amusing to look at, a small container that looked like the candy humans called 'M & M,' socks that were clearly too fat to fit inside shoes, I was even surprised to find more of the essence of cattle mammary secretions in a variety of forms!), Penemue grumpily told me Andy had not given us enough money. I had no way of knowing if Penemue was being truthful or just being a curmudgeon.

Penemue selected what he assured me were appropriate varieties of kitty litter and bathroom tissue. I pointed out that the paintings on his toilet tissue package were also present on a larger-sized parcel, but Penemue insisted that it was 'not for fannies.' When I looked closer, he proved to be correct- the imagery was false! Inside was actually the rougher paper used in the kitchen! I shook my head, shocked, thankful both for Penemue's guidance and for the little windows that allowed me to see past the deceit of the similar plastic pictures.

I followed Penemue silently as I saw that a human attendant processed items for purchase using the aid of machines, after which coinage was tendered, and people were moved rapidly and with little talk. I hid my signs of panic when I observed that all the human patrons were paying with the plastic chips I knew enough to identify as credit cards. Would the attendant sniff us out? Was cash even allowed?

Penemue didn't flinch, and bravely presented the paper money as though he did it every day. I noticed the transaction seemed to go smoothly. The human employee took the note, and the little machine whirred, moved, and dinged. Some coins shot out angrily at Penemue, and the attendant handed him more notes back than Penemue had originally had to begin with. However, I knew better than to question it, and just nodded sagely, as though that were a matter of course, and moved along. I was impressed that Penemue even reached to scoop up the coins from the small cup that the machinery had spat at him.