Chasing the Addiction

Another Beginning

"Drugs, alcohol and ego; they're all a bad mix."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~.~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I never wanted to come down from the skies above, but eventually reality sucked me back in its tight grasp and sputtered me back to earth like a slippery water ride

It was like this automatic connection as soon as I put the pipe up to my lips 

And I knew, I just knew she would be here to stay 

There was a fork in my road called life, either walk down the straight meth free path or venture into an unknown destination that could only bring me to dark places

I chose the later for no reason what so ever other than it appealed to me more

Why should I keep trying to explain my actions and thoughts? Nobody is here to listen or make me chose another direction

My friends and family have me on a fishing hook and suddenly now I'm disconnected from it, swimming away with all I've got

Tired of never feeling satisfied with my life and not living up to expectations

Time to make my own way out into this world, wherever it may lead me

Left or right, up or down, side to side, what does it matter? 

Every hit I inhale sends me into a steeper climax

And I won't ever drop, not ever

"You should move in with me," Andrew said beside me

Whoa, what? 

"I can't tell if you're kidding or not," I said while giving him a disbelieving look 

"Trust me, I'm not. I want you here all the time, beside me. Always. You hate living with your parents anyways, so why not?" 

I was doubtful until that last question slipped from his mouth

Why not? Why not? Why not? 

It was stuck in my head, repeating itself until finally I blurted out,

"Okay, I'm in." 

~~~~~~~~~~~.~~~~~~~~~

Let's just say this wasn't going to go over very well with my parents

First, I needed a game plan, one that was bullet proof

The impulsive side of me wanted to take action right this second, but the rational side won over and the wheels in my mind began turning slowly