Chasing the Addiction

Yearning

"Never regret anything, because at some point it was exactly what you wanted..."

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Currently laying in my bed at home, wondering if life would ever be the same again

My homework rests in front of me, splayed out and practically begging me to do it

But my mind is somewhere else, a million lightyears away 

You know where my mind is? 

Let's just say it's far away from SoberVille

Downstairs, my parents fight about something stupid 

It makes me ponder whether they actually love each other

Resting my head on my arms, I stare up at the ceiling and conjure up more ways to get that rush back

Drugs, of course. Skydiving? Rock climbing? 

It was like lately my shell had been completely broken down, and now I wanted to live life to the fullest

I want to be my own person and not let anyone control me

I want to be that girl that held her head up high and smiled at everyone, and not sneer at them for wearing something I didn't like 

I want be fearless, with Andrew, my parents, my friends, and do things most people would be afraid of doing

I want to be known as that reckless girl, for reasons I couldn't quite understand

I want to be sexy, not conservative and mild; but saucy 

I want to be a whole new Eve

No matter what it takes to accomplish this, 

I will become her. 

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~angel~