SAD ROBOT: an autobiography of my unfortunate existence

45. LONELY

45. LONELY 

Milo watches Hiram leave and doesnʼt attempt to even stop him.

What could he say? How could he expect Hiram to co-exist with another robot? Would he? It appears Milo has his answer to that.

Suddenly, Milo feels himself grow inexplicably sad for Hiram. The bot had just witnessed himself get replaced. The rug had been ripped out from underneath him, just like that. And Milo had done it with no regard whatsoever.

Milo never thought of himself as cruel. But was it possible to act cruelly to a being that wasnʼt even truly alive?

But Hiram never had felt like an average robot. Not once, not for a moment. He was more humanlike than most of the people Milo interacted with at his job on any given day.

Milo somehow should have known there would be conflict when the new android showed up. He shouldʼve tried to prevent it. What could he have done differently? What could he have said? Oh hey, Hiram, by the way, I got a new robot. It might look like Iʼm trying to replace you, but I assure you that Iʼm not, I just really wanted a different robot, one that was female and very attractive. Sorry, donʼt mean to offend you any.

Why do you want an attractive female robot, Milo? he would ask, trying to make him come clean.

Because Iʼm lonely, okay?! Alright!? Iʼm desperately lonely! Are you happy now? Iʼm a lonely, pathetic little man!

Well, at least Milo could admit it to himself.

He looks at Angelica. So perfect in every way. Perfect body, perfect features. Her porcelain skin, her shining eyes.

He never knew just how lonely he had been until this moment. This android girl with itʼs perfect body standing before him made every ache and yearning for the comfort of another human being rise up inside of him.

Except she wasnʼt—

But she would do just fine. To him, she is more human than anyone else.

***

Finally, Milo moves away from the door, away into the living room. He picks up the sheet and platform his new android had come in on.

"Iʼm sorry you had to witness that," he says.

"Iʼm fine," she assures him in her sugary voice. "It was time."

He looks up, confused. "Time? You think so?" Her awareness of things must be so much greater than heʼd given her credit for, especially for being practically straight-out- of-the-box.

"Iʼm just disappointed you didnʼt tell me."

The look on her face is genuine. Her mouth turns down; she authentically looks disappointed in him. He almost feels...extremely bad about it. For an android to have that effect, it was incredible.

"Iʼm sorry. I didnʼt know how to. Weʼd only just met, Iʼd hardly had any time to explain everything."

"Thatʼs okay," she chirps. "I just want to find the answers to your problems." 

"What should I do now?"

"In what way do you mean?" She tilts her head in a way that most people would find very adorable on a girl.

"Well, Hiram is my robot too. Used to be my robot, anyway. And now Iʼm not so sure. I think he mightʼve just left for good. I donʼt think heʼd want to come back. I think he might be gone."

"Oh, thatʼs so sad, I am sorry for your loss..."

Much like the way sheʼd portrayed her disappointment, now Milo genuinely feels her compassion and sympathy. The way her voice went softer, the way her features moved into a portrayal of sadness. It moves him.

"Do you think he would leave and not come back?"

"I could not speak for him. You and he do not understand one another. You are very different."

"I donʼt understand robots. But thatʼs not exactly my fault!" 

"Itʼs alright. Letʼs talk about something else."

"Okay." She feels good to talk to. Milo canʼt remember feeling so at ease around someone, and so instantly. She had been in his apartment not twenty minutes and he already knows he intends for it to be a permanent arrangement. Hiram really was the odd one out. And he still feels incredibly bad about it of course. If Hiram were to return, he would have a conversation with him and explain everything. But if Hiram didnʼt come back, then there would be no way for Milo to track him down. That would be the last he would have seen of his old friend.

But, even given the situation, would Hiram really leave and not come back? Just like that?

"So what do you want to talk about?" Angelica interrupts his thoughts. 

"I donʼt want to talk about me anymore."

"Why not? You are very pretty!"

Did she just—? Did his android girl just compliment him? "No, letʼs talk about you instead. Please."

He sits down on his sofa and Angelica follows suit, sitting next to him but not close enough to touch. She folds her hands on her lap, sitting arrow straight, looking at him almost expectantly.

"What would you like to know about me?" she asks. 

"Tell me anything. Anything at all."

He was so curious. More than curious; he was dying to know every detail about this android girl. Her personality, her unique abilities, her mannerisms, how she gleaned things from him and from the world. Everything.

"My favorite food is any kind of pasta."

—Pardon?

Slowly, like a child trying to hold in a secret, a small, fluttery laugh comes from the mouth of the robot girl as her lips turn into a smile. Milo and her then burst into fits of laughter at the same time.

"Not what I expected you to say!" Milo said, howling with laughter. 

"I say some pretty weird things. I am a weird person!"

She chuckles and Milo canʼt contain going into hysterical fits, holding his sides. 

"I think you and I will get along just fine."

"We already are!"