“D-d-did you just hear t-that?” He got out after a minute of silence,
“Yeah, it was really nice” I told him,
“Thanks...” he said, still not turning around to face me,
“Louis, I came here cau-” I began,
“Because you’re sorry. Yeah, I get it. I’m not the guy for you Harry is, I’m sweet and funny, but he’s the type of guy you want. I hear it all the time. I saved you the time, and the explaining, now you can leave” He said, turning around,
“That’s not what I-” I began again,
“That’s not what you were going to say. Right? You were going to put it in a more long and complex way, but when you really analyze it, that’s what you were going to say. Now please, just leave” He snapped,
“No, Louis. That’s really not what I was going to say. I wasn’t going to word it differently, I was going to say something completely different. Honestly.” I told him.
As the words left his mouth, he looked up to me and his eyes bore into mine. I could feel the pain he was feeling by just looking at his eyes. He’s broken it seems, all because of me.
“ I came here to talk to you. About you, and about me” I told him,
“What about me?” He questioned,
“I just want to know why you snapped at me that day, why you completely shut me out” I told him.
He was silent. I could hear him sigh and he began to explain,
“To make it simple I was jealous and upset, and a little angry” He told me, “I was mad about you sleeping with Harry, well I was furious really. But then I realized I never gave you a chance to explain. It’s kind of a long thing with Harry and I. This isn’t the first time we’ve liked the same girl. She’s always interested in me first, telling me how sweet and cute I am, and they always run away to Harry because he’s flirty and hot. I’m so jealous of him, you have no idea. And I thought maybe, just maybe this one time the girl would be mine, and to find out that I was wrong, killed me. I fall hard and fast, and always end up being broken, so I shut you out, cause I was hoping we’d forget about this” He explained, pouring out his heart to me,
“Oh, well I had no idea about that. And yeah, you probably should’ve given me a chance to explain. You just completely blew me off. I knew that I did something I shouldn’t have, but it’s not fair to not give me a chance to explain” I replied,
“Well, go on then” He stated,
“What, you want me to explain now? Don’t you think it’s a little late?” I snapped, not realizing how bitchy that sounded,
“It is, but I just figured I should give you another chance, since I didn’t before” He said,
I sighed, “Fine. Here we go. Now, you know that I’m not one to take things for granted, let alone throw things away by cheating on people. Just stating that before I say this. You also knew that I was having a hard time with things when you and I first met, correct?” I questioned,
He nodded in response,
“Okay. Well, that first night when I met you and the boys, I still wasn’t feeling 100%, but you guys made me feel a little better. That night after you kissed me, I felt like a terrible person, and I was really upset” I continued,
“Why would you feel really upset after I kissed you?” Louis interrupted,
“Well...at first I didn’t feel anything when you kissed me...and you just feel for me so fast. I felt guilty, because I didn’t realize that I was just too shocked to notice I did have feelings for you” I answered,
“Ohhhh, I see, continue” He said,
“Well I spent that night in Harry and Zayn’s room, since there was nowhere else to stay. They offered me some weed, and I thought ‘Why the hell not? Nothings going right anyways’ and so we all got high together. Zayn left, so then there was just Harry and I. Harry was just as high as I was, maybe less, because I was up there. He kept hitting on me, and it led to us having sex. I was completely gone, you can’t possibly blame me for that. You can’t blame Harry either” I finished,
“That’s what really happened?” He questioned, looking shocked,
“Yeah...I should’ve tried to explain earlier. I should’ve told you the next day, but I didn’t. I’m really sorry. I know that it really hurt you, I’m sorry. Honestly” I told him,
“I had no idea, I should’ve let you explain. I feel like a total douche now, I’m sorry Ellie, really.” He replied,
“It’s fine, the whole thing was just a big mistake I guess” I said, giggling slightly,
“I’ve missed that smile” Louis smiled back, “How have you been, I haven’t really seen you in a while” He asked,
“I don’t really, know... alright I guess” I said, “You?”
“Eh, same old I guess... been looking after Rose quite often” He told me,
“She’s a cute one, really cute. She looks a lot like Harry, his eyes, his dimples, she’ll be really beautiful when she’s older” I went on,
“She really will be. I’m glad that Harry has her, he’d be a right mess if he lost both twins too” Louis continued,
“Yeah, he needed something to stay strong for, and now he has Rosie” I smiled,
“How are you and Harry? I know you’re together, he talks about it all the time” He spoke,
“Not so well.... I love him, with all my heart, I do. It’s just lately, he’s been acting really different. He’s so focused on getting laid, or me looking good enough in front of his friends. He’s not there for me, emotionally, and sometimes he’s not even there to talk to. We haven’t spent time just ourselves or with Rosie in forever. I don’t know what to do...” I spoke
“Well, I’m not sure what to tell you, except to follow your heart. If he’s not in it, then he’s not in it” Louis told me,
“It’s just been really hard for me. Everything’s a mess” I spoke quietly,
“Come here” Louis instructed, and I did as he said. He wrapped his arms around me, and pulled me close to his chest. I’d missed being embraced like this, Harry hadn’t done this for a while.
We sat together like this for who knows how long, just taking in the moment. To be honest, I’d missed Lou, I’d missed him a lot. I sat up and looked up at him, and he was looking back down at me.
“I’ve missed you Ellie, I really have” He told me, he began to lean towards my face, and I followed his lead. I could feel the distance between our lips closing, almost touching...until my phone rang.
Louis quickly opened his eyes and practically threw himself to the other side of the couch.
“There goes that” I thought to myself,
I answered the phone without looking at the caller ID,
“Hello?”
“Heeeeeeeey sexy, is that chuuuuu?” A drunk Harry asked,
“If you mean Eloise, then yes, it’s me” I responded,
“Nooo need to breeakk out the claaaws. Whereeee areee chuuuuuu? I’m loneelyyyy” He whined,
“Harry I think we need to talk about something” I stated,
“IIIIIII Think thaaat yew meaaan chuu need to get ovur heeeere and fuck meeeeeeeh” He slurred,
“Call me when you’re sober. Bye” I said as I hung up the phone.
I don’t think that I’ve ever felt so proud of myself. Harry and I are done if he can’t grow up. We’ll see how our talk goes, but until then, I’m enjoying this evening with two of my favorite boys, and the most beautiful little girl I know.
