She was beautiful. She was smart, and I... I was an idiot. I loved her, but I also let her go.
(Y/n) (l/n), yellow ninja. Sun powers. They were unique. She could essentially control the heat and the rays. Everything about it. It was incredible. Yet, that's not the only thing I loved about her. She was extremely smart, talented, forgiving, hopeful, kind, and so much more.
I only wished I had told her that sooner. I was a jerk and I was afraid.
I remember the day I lost her like it was yesterday....
I wandered down the cold streets of Ninjago along side with (y/n). Her smile radiated and gleamed like no other. Her laugh genuine. Her words meaningful and uncensored. It definitely was a beautiful sight to be had. It warmed my heart.
"Whatcha thinking about greenie?" (Y/n) asked politely.
"Nothing much." I replied shrugging.
Greenie was my nickname. I loved it so much, but not now. It causes me pain. Yet, I know it's not her fault it's mine.
She smiled a bit moving closer to me. Our breath was becoming more visible. I could sense her nervousness and I couldn't quite place it.
"Are you okay?" I ask swinging my arm around her shoulder, pulling her close. I wanted to warm her up.
She simply nodded in reply. "Well yeah... I just.. I have a question for you, Lloyd."
"Ask away."
"I just have to say that I really like you Lloyd. I know this is really bold of me to do, but I can't keep it in. I don't know if you feel the same or if this is too sudden or weird, but will you go on a date with me?" She stuttered.
Now this. This is where I royally screwed up. I wish I could go back and kiss her. Tell her I loved her. Or simply say yes.
I remember looking at her with my jaw dropped. It was a surreal feeling. Someone I liked asking me on a date instead of vice versa. It was a joyful feeling. I loved it.
"W-What you don't want too?" She said nervously looking at me.
I hadn't realized that I hadn't answered nor gave her a smile. "That's not what I said." I blurted out.
"So you do then?" She asked questionably.
"Yes?" I answered phrasing it like a question. Although, I wished I didn't. I don't know why I did. I love her for heavens sake. I should have been ecstatic but for some reason I was so nervous I couldn't bring myself to smile correctly or speak correctly.
I watched as her beautiful face frowned. It tore at my heart. I wish I hadn't done that.
"I-I understand..." She squeaked tears falling out of her eyes.
I grabbed her hand. I didn't want to let her go. "No (y/n) please don't go. I really do I was just shocked..."
"Shocked? Is that really your excuse. Well sorry. I'm apparently a waste of time. I only wished I hadn't been so bold and vulnerable."
Lloyd frowned. "No please. You have to trust me. I just couldn't believe my dreams were coming true."
(Y/n) shook her head. "I love you Lloyd, but it's clear to me that you feel otherwise. And that's okay, but I can't see you anymore or else it will hurt to much." She leaned in and kissed me. It was a magical kiss one I wish I could have enjoyed for longer.
And with that done. I watched her walk away. I knew she never handled rejection well. She was shy, and it was bold of her to put herself out there. I I destroyed that confidence she did had with that stupid shyness I myself had. My eyes drifted to the figure that grew smaller within each second. Little did I know it would be the day she quit our team and found another.
I didn't realize I hurt her so bad. I didn't mean too. I wantwe to stop her. To hold her in my arms and kiss her with so much passion it hurt, but I couldn't. Not any longer. Once I manned up enough to find her again; She was married with kids. It broke my heart, but I knew she was happy. I should have looked for her quicker, but what excuse did I have? I was scared? No, that was always my excuse, I wish it hadn't been, but that was the reality of it. I was a coward.
I often think of my only love. Yet, there is always one thought that always lingers in my mind...
What would have happened if I only but spoken up?
Hey it's been a long while!!! I've had the worst writers block ever... I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter but I hoped you liked it anyway. They idea just popped in my head and I decided to start writing it before I lost it.
Anyway! Happy Holliday's!
Love you all.
till next time
PEACE ✌️
