I fell in love with him

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Chapter 35

The celebration came to an end, and everyone went to their tents to sleep. I was walking to my tent when Pan suddenly stopped me. I walked to him, waiting for an order or even an insult. He seemed troubled, he didn't dare look me in the eyes, and he rarely avoids my eyes.

"What helps you to fall asleep and not have any nightmares?" He asked me, making me arch my brow. Nightmares. Usually, he was the one who helped me to fall asleep, but hearing I'm taking for help was a true shock. 

"When you play your pipe," I answered truthfully. He let a frustrated breath out.

 Yeah, the pipe can't help him.

I thought about something else, but nothing came to my mind. But then I remembered when we fall asleep together. A little smile came to my face at that thought. That night was the most peaceful night ever. It was raining, thunder, and wind, and I was sleeping like a baby. Because I was in Peter's arms. Did he have a peaceful night too?

"Pan, this will sound crazy... I.." Pan looked back at me waiting for me to continue..Why did I even say that? Why would he be interested in that Clary? Why would he care about that night?

"Do you remember when it was raining, and I couldn't sleep because of the thunder?" I asked playing with my fingers nervously. Pan on the other hand was calm and looking at me with curiosity. "When I fall on top of you and we fall asleep like that?" I added still so nervous and he chuckled.

"Yes, Clary I remember. What with that night?" He asked his voice a little bit harsh. 

"That night I didn't have nightmares. I was sleeping peacefully."  I dared to say.

Did I really just say that? Yes, I did. He probably thinks that I'm weird. I mean, why in the world would he care about that night? 

Pan smiled, kindly. The smile I see so rarely, the smile that always makes me think I'm imagining things.

"Clary, take my hand," Pan offered his hand to me.  I arched my brow at him and he chuckled.
" Clary, Take my hand," He said again and I slowly took it. My feet suddenly were not on the grass, they were on the hard rock. Cliff, or how I call it "our" cliff. Stupid right?  I looked up and saw the stars.  The stars, I used to see in my world, were nothing compared to this. The sky was full of stars, and you could see shooting stars. The stars bleeding in each other's galaxies, shining, in pure silver light, made me wish to just try to touch them for a second. It was breathtaking. I was so amazed that I didn't realise that Pan was lying on the floor, a little bit hidden in the shadow of the tree. I lay beside him. Something was wrong, and I could see it in his empty eyes. I took his hand and he looked at me. 

"Are you okay?" I asked and he squeezed my hand and smiled a little bit.

"Yes, sleepy head." He answered. I didn't let his hand go, I didn't want to, I couldn't. I was only looking at him. At his perfect face. I could see some cuts on his yaw, and some on his neck, little scars. He was really looking like some boy from a story. And he is. He is Peter Pan. After my long staring at Peter, he broke the silence.

"Do you want to stay here, with me tonight?" Peter asked and I tensed up. My head was telling me, no, but my heart was yes. And usually, I listen to my head, but this time, my heart spoke.

"Yes," I whispered and he looked over at me, a smile of gratitude on his face... We were star gazing and talking, and talking. He talked about all the adventures he had, or even the lost boys had, making me laugh and cry from laughter. I never thought that I and Pan would talk for hours, laugh, be together and enjoy our time together.

"Clary, in the book, how did they describe Peter Pan?" Pan asked me after a moment of silence. He held my hands, playing with my fingers. I smiled at his question.

"Peter Pan is nice looking, always in green, brave, strong.." Pan smirked at that.

"I'm not nice looking, I'm hot." He said and I rolled my eyes at him.

"He is nice, good, he loves his lost boys, he is in love with... Wendy." I said, the name Wendy like a poison on my tongue.  I realized he stopped playing with my fingers after hearing the name Wendy. a

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