Believe in Me. (Liam Payne Fanfiction.)

Chapter 39

*Song of the Chapter is Just Give Me A Reason by Pink. Shout out to @werkingwithstyles :)
Unfortunately the song isn't on the side bar though, Jessica's gymnastics is. x

"Can you tie this in my hair?" Jessica asks holding the ribbon up to me.

"Turn around." I smile.

It's a real smile, I'm not forcing myself this time. After Louis and Niall left yesterday I found myself thinking that this is for the best. I can be on my own with out any distractions, I can raise Jessica on my own. When I kicked them out yesterday I felt as if I was kicking out my past, I feel like the weight of the world being lifted up off of my shoulders. 

24 hours of self loathing is more then enough for me.

I tie the ribbon into Jessica's black hair with ease, "You know what? You are one beautiful little girl Jessica Marie." I giggle turning her around. My daughter throws her arms around my neck.

"Your just saying that because you're my mum."

"I'm saying it because it's the truth, love." I smile hugging her back, "Are you nervous for today?"

She shakes her head, "Daddy told me one time that never to let my nerves get to me."

My heart stings a little bit, as if a knife is tearing the surface of my newly healed heart but I ignore it, "Wise words."

She nodds letting go of me, "I miss him." 

Her bottom lip quivers a little bit but she refuses to let her tears fall, she's a lot stronger then me. I feel bad for keeping her from Liam but she doesn't need to know how badly he's hurt her without knowing it. How much she misses him hurts me though, because despite what I'm going threw with her father i know he misses her too. 

I'm stuck between my missery and my own daughter's happiness. I don't know what to do, but it's to soon to talk to Liam. I just can't and I'm not ready to face that issue right now. I just started healing, I'm not ready to see him.

"He misses you too." I say kissing her forehead.

"When is he coming home?" She asks zipping up her jumper and grabbing her gym bag.

"Soon." I lie. I can't tell her that Liam's home and I'm not letting them see each other. Plus this is Jessica's day. This is the day she'll be the first ever 6 1/2 year old on the level eight teem for her gym. She has to stay focused.

...

The taxi pulls up infront of the Flying Angels Gymnastics Club and Jessica jumps right on out of the car. I hand the driver the correct amount of money before taking Jessica's hand and walking off into the gym. The second we walk into the gym Jessica's coach calls her over to warm up. I find my way over to the Parent's section, it's basically a sitting area where there's a glass window so you can watch your child compete or practice. Thankfully they have this section open so I don't have to sit on the bleacher's with the other parent's from different gyms watching their kids compete today. 

I take the seat right in front keeping a close eye on Jessica, she's stretching with her team mates. None of them are talking they just stay focused on their own thing, it's a strange sight since little girls are so talkative. Jessica is usually a social butterfly -there's no way of shutting her up once she opens her mouth- but not when she's in the gym, she keeps to herself. It works though, she's the youngest one competing today and if she places in the top 10 then she'll be on to level 8 tomorrow. I have such butterflies for her, I don't care if she isn't nervous. I'm nervous for her.

"Ms. Mitchell?" 

I turn my head looking over to the person who called my name, Jessica's coach Brandy. In fear of loosing my seat I leave my jacket there before making my way over to the woman.