Kindred Spirit

Chapter 9

Amaya has many questions for him; Ryker is aware and certain of that fact. He wishes to answer them, but still, he has to pace himself. He had lost her far too many times; he wouldn't dare risk it again.

Hs frustration hasn't evaporated, he is still angry that she has hasn't yet regained her memories. Why should he have to endure the pain of their shared past each day, while she gets to forget? Why should he love her, when she can't remember that she loves him back?

Ryker attempts to calm himself with the reassurance that someday soon she will remember all that she was, and all that they have been through. That is why he allowed her to drink from him. His blood was sure to bring back some memory, it always did.

Amaya gazes upon him, several emotions mixed and intertwined. Confusion, anger, fear, sadness... It's all understandable. "Tell me all you have remembered," Ryker says in a gentle but firm voice. He realizes then that Amaya isn't exactly staring at him, but more like through him, as if she isn't focusing on him. "Amaya," He says as he places his hands on both of her shoulders. She jumps at his touch, clearly feeling the same rush of electrifying warmth that their touch causes him. Her eyes finally meet with his now. "Tell me what memories..." He trails off. Does she not know they are memories? What else could she think they are? "Tell me what you have remembered."

"Remembered?" She asks stepping away from him and his gentle hold on her shoulders. He could have stopped her; he can pull her back to him even now and force her to be in his arms. But no, he allows her to put a small bit of distance between them. "What are you talking about?" She demands, irritation dripping from her voice. "I'm tired of you acting as though I should know things, but we both know I don't, so just tell me!"

"Do not raise your voice at me again," Ryker's voice has a slight warning note interlaced in his words. "I can't just come right out and tell you everything; I've done it in the past and well, let's just say it never ended well." He takes a deep breath. "I will give you the little information I believe you are able to handle, but that is all. I'm not doing this to emotionally harm you, Amaya. I'm doing it to make sure you survive all that is to come."

"Survive what?" She asks warily. Ryker has missed the innocent look in her eyes; he has missed the sweetness of her voice. He has missed the inner strength that arises within her when she needs it.

"I cannot tell you," Ryker finally admits as he runs his fingers through his hair. "Now please sit down and tell me what your visions have revealed to you," Ryker says as he motions towards the small table and chairs. Amaya appears hesitant at first and does not move from her place. Ryker sighs as he walks past her and takes his seat at the table. "I'm not asking you to join me, I'm telling you, now come here."

Amaya moves to the chair opposite Ryker, a displeased look evident on her pretty face. However Ryker catches the slight spark of curiosity in her eyes. She settles into the chair and meets his eyes steadily. "Okay, I'm here now start explaining."

"That's not how it works, you tell me what you know, and I decide what I choose to share with you." Ryker is aware that will anger her. A part of him wants her to do something brash, something drastic; he will then have an excuse to drink from her again as a form of punishment. However he doesn't wish for her to be angry with him. He longs for her to look at him with love, happiness, and other emotions he has only felt around her.

Amaya doesn't speak for a few moments. Her muscles tense as if she is preparing to throw herself across the table and kill him then and there. Ryker sits back with a relaxed attitude, awaiting her oncoming attack.

Only she remains still as the tension slowly leaves her body.

She must have figured out what his motives were.

Taking a deep breath Amaya begins to talk, the words falling from her mouth in a slight rush as if she wants to get them all out before she changes her mind and decides not to tell him. Ryker is surprised she is actually telling him what her visions have shown her of her past.

"I- I saw you and me, only it wasn't me... well she was but that's not possible because I don't remember any of this happening and I can tell it happened a long time ago." She had begun to ramble, though Ryker finds it cute he needs her to be serious for the moment. Amaya must notice this in his eyes because her voice lowers and she speaks in a much calmer and slower pace. "I saw..." She hesitates. "I saw you and this past version of me, you two stood in the ruins of a village, she was upset about what she had done, I could feel her emotions." Amaya looks down. "A woman appeared and she cursed the two of you," Her voice has grown quieter as the vision fills her mind once more. "You were to live eternally and the other version of me... was doomed to live many lives, her soul would be immortal but her bodies would always die young."

"Us," Ryker says gently, "She cursed us."

"That cannot be me that I saw, I would never harm innocent people! I would never love you; I would never do the things she had done."

"But you did," Ryker says as he looks at her, wishing he could clear up her worries and confusion.

"I did not, I never would have... you're lying. You're trying to mess with me, you're trying to turn me against my brother, and you're trying to fill my head with false images!" Amaya stands from the table, nearly knocking her chair backward as she does so.

"Sit down Amaya," Ryker commands but she does not listen. "It is dangerous for you to deny the parts of your past, it can... it has killed you in the past. You must embrace all of you."

"I've had enough of your lies!" Amaya suddenly screams. "I can't take anymore!" She holds her head, clearly in pain. In an instant his arms around her, holding her up as her knees weaken.

"I told you that you weren't ready... This is why I won't tell you everything," Ryker says trying to keep his voice soft as he holds her trembling body. "Amaya calm down before something happens," Ryker warns. IF she became too overwhelmed, too scared, and denied her true self she would die. He had witnessed it for the first time with Hadley.

Amaya continues thrashing wildly, her voice beginning to crack as she continues screaming. "I'm not her, she isn't me! I refuse to believe it! You're lying, you're tricking me! I won't fall for it... I won't." He places his hand on her forehead.

She begins to calm as his Vampire magic flowers into her body, soothing her mind, her heart, and her spirit. Ryker places her now tired body on her bed. He doesn't wish to put her fully to sleep, but he will if she continues to say dangerous words. He will not lose her, not now and not ever.

"Amaya, listen to me... Denying who you are will not be good for you, it has-"

"Death would be a better fate than loving you," She interrupts him, he voice calm now but still filled with a deep hatred. She struggles to sit up. "I don't believe you; I don't believe any of this. I never will."

Ryker eases her back down, his face showing a sad expression with hints of anger in his eyes. "Have a nice sleep Amaya... If you don't trust me then trust yourself."
With that he watches her eyes close in a matter of seconds. She met his eyes one final time, yes they were cold but they also had a trace of... Ryker struggles to find the correct word to describe the look - remembrance, understanding, but not acceptance.

"Liara, please find your way back to me..." He has not spoken her true name for years now, not since he lost her previous life, the life he thought was her true last one. Each time he attempted to make her immortal in her previous lives it affected her like poison and she would die not long after drinking her blood. Ryker never could tell which life was her last, which life allowed them to have one final chance to live together for eternity.

He thought her previous life, Merayya was her final life. She was an understanding person in that life, she accepted everything quickly... she even became pregnant. That should have been it. That should have been her last life, her eternal life. But the people she calls family had interfered and she was born again...

Ryker attempts not to look at her as he leaves the room. But once reaching the door he slowly turns and lays his eyes upon her. He doesn't take his eyes off her as the door slowly shuts. He only looks away when he now stares at the dark wood of the closed door. He locks it before turning and walking down the hall away from her. As he does so, his cold mask slips back into its usual place easily.