Absolut Style

Chapter 41

The smell of french toast fills the air as well as freshly brewed coffee. The combination is heavenly and my stomach is already growling.

"I can't go in there now" Harry says frustrated as he runs back in my room. His trip to the toilet was no less than comic, like watching a cartoon. He opened the door slightly, his head peeking from the bedroom door and when he realised no one was in the corridor he sped to the toilet to shower and get ready. The same happened for when he returned and it would be a lie if I said I wasn't amused by his frustration.

"Why baby? She's just my mom. She's cool. Don't worry!" I smile at him while brushing my hair.

"Are you serious right now? You mom saw me naked, like completely naked. I fucking shook her hand while trying to hide my nuts with a t-shirt. Thank God for Jimmy's shirt in your stuff otherwise i'd be wearing that t-shirt again while talking to her" I see he is so frustrated but I cannot sympathise. I'm enjoying this way too much.

"Are you worried because my mom got to see little Harry?" I laugh.

"Lit..Lit..Little Harry?" he stammers.

"Sorry you had to hear that" he addresses his penis as if it's an actual person and continues.

"Little, seriously Ella?" he shakes his head in disbelief.

"I'm sorry, please forgive me. I didn't mean for you to hear that Giant Harry" I reply leaning lower me speaking to it. Oh God this is getting weirder by the second.

"You can laugh all you want but next time this fellow will not satisfy you" he says pointing at it suggestively.

"Hm, really? Wanna bet?" I bat my eyelashes innocently.

"Ella cut it out. What the fuck am I going to do?" he asks me again the playful mood gone.

"Good morning everyone!" I hear Jimmy in the corridor. My mom surely called him.

"Leeeenaaaaa" he shouts. "Thanks for the phonecall. I can never turn down good food" then I hear people talking but can't make out what they are saying. Harry and I move to the door and like the immature children that we are we press our ears on the wooden surface trying to make out the mumbled words. Then there's laughter and some other sounds, probably someone setting the table and laughs again. There are more people there than we originally thought.

"Shit, shit, shit! This isn't good" Harry says just as I'm about to open the door.

"Relax Harry. Things could have been worse"

"Worse? What? Leena catching us fucking our brains out?" he exhales.

"No but there is worse than that too?"

"What could be possibly be worse than that?" he urges me.

"Emm...my dad catching us fucking our brains out?" he can't even see the humor in that. He is terrified by the idea of something like that happening.

"Or my brother Chris" I add and he pales.

"Oh Jesus. I will stay here until I'm old and grey" he murmurs.

"Don't be such a child, Harry. The woman has a husband and a son. She is well acquainted with the male anatomy. Come on I'm hungry"

"Not this anatomy! And...and why...why are you so bloody calm Ella?" he asks suddenly.

"I'm going out. You can stay.I'll bring you magazines and cigarettes whenever I visit. I will write once a week" I say and open the door walking out leaving Harry there astounded.
"I don't even smoke" he mumbles.

I walk to the kitchen and find everyone sitting around the large kitchen table eating breakfast although it's past noon. When I say everyone I mean Chrys, Jimmy, Ed and Gemma. How they got there I have no idea but my mom has always been that way. When she cooks she cooks for an army, when she gives advice she becomes Dr. Phil, when she is in a good mood Ellen Degeneres is a cheap imitation. She is, how can I put it, a lot to handle. A gorgeous, funny mess.