Chapter 38

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Bea

"I missed you little sis" Maddie whispered to me as we sat in the backseat, I was cuddled up to her laying my head on her lap, Demi had stopped the car and turned around to take a picture of us all cuddled up.

@ddlovato: my cute ass baby sisters all cuddled up @maddielovesyou1 @beaidelagarza

I rolled my eyes at her predictiveness and switched my position so that my face was facing Maddie's stomach

"We are here babies" Demi announced loudly, I sat up and got out of the car

"You babygirl get to stay with me tonight, I talked to Dallas and I want to keep an eye on you, we can have a snuggle night? How's that sound" I nodded eagerly and hugged Demi tightly then ran to Maddie and hugged her

"We are having sister snuggle night!" I cheered she giggled at me

"But what about Dally?" Demi just smirked. We opened the front door and there stood Dallas, Maddie ran up to her and gave her a huge hug

"I missed you Dally" Maddie said whilst hugging Dallas

"DemDem, when can I come back here? I love Dallas but miss being with you" she smiled sadly at me

"Babygirl, when Maddie get's better" I looked sadly down at the ground and nodded a few tears escaping, Demi picked me up and hugged me

"Baby, you know I love you right?" I nodded

"I just want you Dem, I miss you" she rubbed my back

"I know you do babygirl, trust me I miss having you around too but I need to help Maddie" I wriggled around and she put me down, I was extremely upset with the comment she had made

"You don't think I need help? I rely on a feeding tube to keep me alive, you know what forget it, don't ever pick me up from Dallas' let me die!" I yelled before running out the front door and down the driveway.

I ran for miles until I arrived at Nick's house, I knew that I could sweet-talk him into not telling Demi I was with him. I walked up to the door and pressed the button. He opened the door a couple of minutes later

"Bea?" He said looking at me

"What are you doing here?" I walked past him into the house,

"Yeah, sure, make yourself at home Isabella" he said sarcastically

"Oh hush Nicholas," I said jumping onto his couch, he rolled his eyes and sat down next to me

"So..." he said looking at me

"So..." I mimicked

"Why are you here?" I laughed

"You sound like you don't want me here, can't I visit my favourite unbiological brother without suspicion?" he chuckled and shook his head

"Nope, now spill" I sighed,

"I need you to not tell Demi where I am, or Dallas, or Madison, or anyone" he sighed

"What did you do?" I shook my head

"Come on Bea, if you don't tell me I'll tell them where you are" I looked down

"I fought with Demi, kind of, I yelled at her, but please don't tell them" I said as I started to cry

"Alright fine, I won't just please stop crying, you are hurting my heart" I smiled and jumped on him hugging him

"Thank you" he hugged me back before unwrapping my arms from him and turning me around so I was side on, I heard him gasp and looked back at him

"How long?" he asked with sad eyes

"How long what?" he looked at me

"How long have you been doing this to yourself?" I looked at him confused

"How long have you been starving yourself?" he asked softly

"It probably started about two years ago, I was on and off dieting, and then I started purging and yeah, now I'm here with a feeding tube, and I rely on that to keep me alive" a tear rolled down Nick's cheek and I wiped it away

"How did I not notice?" He questioned aloud

"Because you were busy, and that's not your fault, Demi said the same thing" he sighed

"You don't do it anymore right? You're trying to get better?" I pointed to the tube in my nose

"This is how they force feed me" I stated unhappily, truth be told if I had it my way I'd be dead, I don't want recovery, never really did, I only said it so I wouldn't hurt Demi. I peeled the sticker that was holding the tube to my face off before running to the bathroom and locking the door.

I stuck my fingers down my throat and as I vomited the end of the tube came up, I then proceeded to pull it out of my nose, which I have to say hurt like a bitch. I flushed the toilet and walked back out with the tube in hand

"What did you do!" Nick yelled shocked, I shrugged

"I don't want to get fat" I said he shook his head and walked back to the couch.

We had been sitting on the couch watching TV for about two hours when Nicks phone rang he answered it on speaker

"Nick! We can't find her she's missing" Demi rushed out fastly

"Slow down Dems and repeat what you said"

"Bea is missing! She yelled at me and ran out the door and now we can't find her, god this is all my fault" Demi sobbed

"Dem I'm sure she just went to clear her head, she'll be back soon" he said calmly

"You don't get it! She's sucidal Nick! She could have already killed herself, and her separation anxiety is back and oh god no" Demi started to sob harder

"Dems I need you to calm down, what's wrong?" Nick was biting his lip

"Last time she went out on her own she was raped, what if that happens again?" Demi sobbed

"Dem call Wilmer or I will, we both know that right now it's not safe for you to be alone" Demi sniffled

"O-okay" she said

"Call me if you feel like you are going to relapse" Nick said with a hint of panic in his voice

"o-okay" Demi sniffled and hung up.

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