Confessions of Your Friendly Neighborhood Lifeguard

Chapter Twenty Three

"Oh, Rae, you look stunning," my mom sighed. "You'll be the most beautiful girl there." I stared at myself in the mirror, wearing the yellow organza floor length dress. I hadn't worn a gown in at least a year, sincevmy junior prom back in Oregon. It was strange being dressed up like this after all this time...

"You're supposed to be the most beautiful girl in the room," I replied. "You're the bride after all." My mother has just finished her final fitting for her wedding dress for the wedding the next day. I was now finishing up my bridesmaid's dress fitting. 

"Well, you look just like me when I was your age, so by extension, I would still be the most beautiful," she smiled. The relationship between my mom and I could be awkward at times, but over the past nine months, I've forgiven and forgotten most of my anger. It wasn't wasy, but I knew it was for the best. It had been hard at first, to accept my dad's advice that day in August, but now I know it was for the best. I was truly excited for the wedding tomorrow, and excited for my mom, and even Brad. This was good, and life was good.

After the fitting was over, I left my mom's new home (mansion) that she shared with Dr. Brad. I took her car and I decided to take a nostalgic cruise around Snow Beach. It was the first time I came back since I left that July night, and it was a strange feeling to be there again. It hadn't changed one bit from when I left. The streets were still busy with tourists in the June afternoon, and the Bridge was crowded as always. 

I tried to look away as I drove past Patrick's cupcake store, but I was too curious as I focused quickly on the window of the store. Fortunately, probably, Patrick wasn't in there. I'm not sure how I would have reacted if I did see Patrick, but it probably would have been poorly. 

I did my best to forgive and forget. Forgive my mom and forget Patrick. For the most part, I did well forgetting about my summer fling. Once school started and I was reuinted with my old friends, it wasn't hard to keep myself distracted. While I didn't go back to my former flame, Teddy, I didn't spend my time moping about Patrick. That being said, I don't think I ever really got over Patrick... just forgot about him. I didn't want to grieve him, I just wanted to pretend he didn't exist. Especially considering the way I left him. He desreved better.

Before I knew it, I found myself driving past the B-SAC, my former home away from home. As I drove past quickly, I saw the familiar figures of my old friends and a twinge of sadness came though me. I did miss them, I realized at that moment. I wondered how they were doing and what they were up to. We had graduated and were headed to college... where were they going? So many questions rushed through me, but I drove past and returned to the hotel where my dad and I were staying.

When I returned to our beachside hotel, my dad was nowhere to be found. I then went out and looked for him on the beach behind the hotel. It didn't take me long to locate my dad, laying in the sand with his griflriend, Abby. I sat down on the beach next to them and they smiled as I joined them.

"How's by beautiful bridesmaid?" my dad smiled and asked.

"I'm good," I smiled. "A little nervous though."

"Why's that?" Abby asked. Abby was a nice lady, and I truly enjoyed her company. She also made my dad unbelievably happy, which didn't hurt either.

"It's just weird being back in town," I shrugged. "And I've never been in a wedding before."

"It'll be fun," my dad reassured. "Are you going to see that boy you were going to bring home last summer?"

"Oh my god, no," I replied, rolling my eyes in typical teenage fashion. I hadn't filled my dad in on really, any details about Patrick with my dad, which made it especially surprisng that he brought it up.

"Are you going to see any of your friends?" Abby asked.

"No," I replied, shaking my head. "That's why I brought you two with. So I'd have someone to hang out with while my mom is in her wedded bliss."

"That's not weird, is it?" my dad asked. "That we came back to town for my ex-wife's wedding?"

"I came back to town for the wedding. You came for vacation," I corrected.

Life in the Petrov family was good, and I really was happier than ever. Every piece of the puzzle fit together in my family, and to be honest, I didn't even miss Patrick. All I needed was this. My family, happy, and then I could finally be happy. 

That night, before I went to bed, I took a walk around town. I walked through the main drag, weaving through the tourists, and past all the t-shirt shops and tourist attractions. As I walked across the street from the laser tag arean, I paused and stared at it for a few moments. I yearned to see them all, but, I couldn't bring myself to actually going to see them. If this last year has taught me anything, it's that I need to leave things in the past and move on. They were my past.

As I started to move again, I found myself suddenly frozen. Across the way the figure of a very familiar person stormed across the sidewalk. My heart started beating amillion times a minute as Patrick walked up to the laser loft. His hair was shorter, but curlier and it looked good. He had a familiar frown on his face like he was always crabby, which he used to be. My eyes were absolutely stuck to him and I couldn't break away. If he would have turned, he would have seen me staring.

As his gorgeous self disappeared behind, clearly climbing up to the laser loft, I felt my heart twinge in a way it hadn't since the night I left him on the curb. Just seeing him again, lit a fire withing me, one I was fighting eagerly to control. He was just so beautiful, and sulking and... I had to control myself. Patrick was the past. Snow Beach was the past. He was nothing.

In the back of my mind, I knew that I was all talk, and that I still had feelings for him. But I would saw off my own arm and eat it before I would admit it to myself. All I had to do was make it through the wedding the next day, and I would be home free.