Confessions of Your Friendly Neighborhood Lifeguard

Chapter Ten

I woke up the next day to my phone ringing at the ungodly hour of 10:00 A.M. After fighting the urge to chuck the phone in to the nearby Atlantic, I answered anyways. Besides, the caller ID was unknown, and I'll saw off my own arm before I pass on the mystery that is an unknown number. 

"Hello," I answered. Although, in reality, it probably sounded more like "wheflooo." FYI, I am not a morning person. 

"Rae?" a male at the other end asked.

"Yes, who is this?" I questioned, quickly sitting up in bed.

"It's your father." My heart stopped beating for a second. I hadn't heard his voice in months, maybe even a year. It was a strange realization though, that I didn't know my dad's own voice. I think I felt bad about it for a moment. Only for a moment though, because I was quickly overcome with overwhelming anger.

"How the hell did you get this number?" I snapped.

"Rae Rae, I've missed you so much. I would really like to talk about-"

"How the hell did you get this number?" I repeated myself, my voice deepening in pure anger.

"Please, Rae. Let's meet up somewhere and talk," my father continue talking as my fists clenched and my jaw tightened. My father kept talking for some time before I finally got up the nerve to talk. Or scream.

"How the fuck did you get this number you disgusting bastard?" I shouted. The other end of the line was silent, i couldn't even hear him breathing. All I could hear was the distant rushing of the ocean outside my window. 

"When Dr. Klein sent me her bill it had your number listed on it," he explained. "But please, Rae-" I hung up the phone quickly. I leaped out of my head and ran downstairs, searching for my mother.

"Mom!" I called to no avail. "MOM!" My anger was quickly transferring over to my mother because she was nowhere to be found and I was having a major emergency. I searched the whole house for my mom and she was definitely MIA. I checked the garage for her car and found it to be missing and I finally remembered she was working. Obviously. 

However, still in my awkward state between extreme anger and on the brink of tears, I burst out of my back door and ran towards the ocean. My feet stumbled through the sand, smushing under my feet until I reached the water. I ran in to the water until I was waist deep and I gave my phone a good heave in to the Atlantic, where I could be positive that no one could ever reach me again. 

It was only a few seconds after my phone hit the water, that I realized I was crying. Sobbing actually. My whole body heaved with each sob as I slowly backed out of the water and collapsed on to the sand. My body shook until something hit me. 

I wasn't angry. For the first time in who knows how long, I wasn't mad at my dad, I was sad. I was upset. And then I started laughing. I felt like a crazy woman, fully clothed and dripping wet, laughing like a crazy woman on the beach. But I was happy because I was sad! I mean saying that right now sounds pretty crazy in itself, but it was so refreshing for me. I also couldn't help but think about dozens of sessions with Dr. Klein did nothing, but I solved my own shit in five minutes!

And then of course I realized I didn't have a phone anymore. And well, that was a bummer. I had the day off so I put getting a new phone on the top of my list. So I pulled myself together and got ready for the day, feeling surprisingly happy and ready to go.

That night, I sat on my back porch until the sun went down. I thought I could watch the sunset over the ocean, but then I remember the sun sets in the West and I'm stupid. But anyways, I sat there until my mom came out to talk to me.

"There you are Rae," she said, taking a seat beside me. "I tried calling you from work but your phone was disconnected."

"Right about that. I got my phone kinda wet, so I had to get a new one," I shrugged. 

"How did you get it wet?"

I opened my mouth to speak but promptly shut it again. I didn't want to worry my mom with stories about my dad, she had enough on her plate. Besides, if I told her about dad calling, that would mean I would also have to include the part about my temporarily going crazy. 

"Long story," I replied.

"Teenager code for I don't want to know," my mom laughed. "And, I trust you. But I do have something I want to talk to you about."

"Oh?" I asked. I tried to hide my nerves, but my mom knew me too well to see past them and she laughed.

"It's nothing big. Just that I have a date." And I swear to you my jaw dropped straight to the ground. I swear my mom didn't even know what a man was since my dad left. 

"Actually," she continued, "this is going to be our fifth date." And I swear to you, my jaw dropped to the core of the fucking earth. "Now, I know I probably should have told you but I know you have trust issues with men because of your father, and I didn't want to tell if it wasn't serious and-"

"Mom, stop," I interrupted. "It's okay for you date new men. I'm 17 years old, I'm very familiar with the concept of dating. And I"m choosing to ignore that trust issues comment, but I approve."

"Okay, well I'm kinda not searching for your approval," my mom continued, twiddling her thumbs. I watched her fidget and clearly she felt awkward and I felt like I was the mother here as I waited for her to fess up.

"What is it you're trying to tell me?" I asked, leaning forward towards her. 

"Well, Brad is coming here. Tonight. Actually, he's here." My eyebrows raised and I waited for her to say what she wanted from me. And then I got it.

"Oh, right. You want the house to yourself," I said. "Oh dear God, I can't believe I just had to say that."

"I would really appreciate it, Rae." She folded her hands together and pouted like she really was a teenager.

"Say no more. I literally don't want to hear it," I said, disgusted. I slipped on my shoes and hopped up from the porch and walked away from the house. I wasn't upset with my mother, just quite frankly disgusted. Obviously, she was a woman, she had needs but I didn't want to think about them. I wouldn't be coming back until the morning, that was for sure.