Chapter 22

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Annoyed, I tossed my rucksack onto my bed upon walking into my room. Kieran was laughing at my expense as he followed me in. He shut the door behind us and walked over to my closet. I laughed sarcastically, making a face at him.

“I still can’t believe you spilled caramel all over yourself!” he said.

“I tripped,” I muttered, trying to defend myself.

He shook his head and flopped down on my bed. “If you say so.”

I slid my shirts along the rack, absently looking for a replacement. I was so clumsy that it was plainly sad. When Kieran had gotten to my place after school, we went for a light snack of apples and caramel. I poured some of the sticky topping into the bowl and then I’d just freaking tripped over nothing as I walked to the table. Caramel was now drenching my sweatshirt and I had to change it.

My eyes settled on the few options I had for long-sleeved shirts. I mentally chose the one I wanted and, leaving it on the hanger, I stepped back to pull my sweatshirt off over my head.

Kieran had been flipping through movie channels while I had been looking for a different top to wear. Now, he was watching me. I rolled my eyes. I didn’t know why he still bothered so much with me. I told him he could go out with anyone he wanted but as far as I knew he hadn’t had meaningless sex for a while.

I pulled my short-sleeved shirt off and hastily reached for the black jumper I wanted to put on. Kieran’s eyes on me were a little too calculating for my taste. It made me nervous that he’d notice more than he needed to.

“Hey,” Kieran said quickly.

My hand stilled mid-air, and I felt my eyes widen a little. I blinked and turned to him with a casual expression. “What?”

Kieran got off of the bed, his eyes locked on me. I creased my brow at him. He stepped up to me and touched my arm. “What happened?”

I glanced down and my heart rate went crazy. Kieran was looking at the fading bruises on my arm. He was touching them. He saw them--acknowledged them. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I wore a sweater every damn day this week so I wouldn’t have to share them with anyone.

As far as I was concerned, the biggest reason I was panicking about this was because the light brown and yellow marks were meant for me only. It was my reminder of Rikert. I was selfish and wanted them for myself. I didn’t want anyone to see that I was Rikert’s because they didn’t deserve to know how Rikert touched me with love and affection. That was how I saw those bruises. I could only imagine him standing next to me and touching my arm.

I shrugged as naturally as I could. The lie slipped off of my tongue with such ease, it nearly worried even me. “I tripped and fell on my way out of the shower last weekend.”

Kieran looked at me carefully. “You did?”

I nodded and grabbed the jumper. I casually threw it on over my head. Part of me felt like it was pointless to try and hide myself from view now that Kieran had seen my arm, but the rest of me still wanted to keep them as hidden as possible. It was my secret. I didn’t want him to keep looking at them. It made me feel exposed and that was one of the things I hated the most.

“Yup,” I said. “I hit my arm on the counter pretty hard. It didn’t really hurt, though, so no worries.”

“Hmm,” he said shortly. I walked back to my bed and sat down. “That’s good, I guess.”

I gave him a smile as he came to join me. “Cheers.”

Kieran settled down on his side on my bed. I changed the channel and watched a few seconds of whatever programme was playing. This had become routine for us the last couple weeks. “Tripping twice in one week,” he said. I shrugged again. “That’s pretty sad.”

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