The Dirt (Mötley Crüe/Nirvana)(au)

Chapter Twenty Seven

Keeping a relationship a secret wasn't the hardest thing in the world, but it wasn't easy either. They couldn't hold hands, nor could they kiss in any public setting. They had to sneak off with each other, and that definitely wasn't easy. The guys would become too suspicious if they snuck off together too much.

Vince would offer to help Tish in the kitchen, and when Vince went to pick up food or go to the store, she'd offer to go with. Somehow though, nobody had grown suspicious yet. Tish really thought people would grow suspicious by now, but it had been weeks, and they were still safely a secret from everyone.

Tish felt bad for keeping the relationship a secret, but they had to. Mick would kill them, and he'd forbid them from being together. He'd claim it was because she wasn't finished grieving and didn't know what she was feeling, or he'd blame it on Vince being a rockstar that didn't know how to keep it in his pants. It was something she had heard a couple times because of Kurt, and she never believed anyone who said it, and she'd give Vince the same trust.

Vince felt bad for keeping their relationship a secret from his band mates, since they were his best friends. He never had friends as good as them, which made him feel awful for keeping a secret so big. He knew he had to though, if he wanted to stay with Tish and finally be happy after losing his little girl.

Tish made him feel happiness and love; feelings he hadn't felt since his daughter had passed. It wasn't anyone's fault, he just had trouble feeling much of anything other than sadness and anger since her death. Tish made him feel other feelings though, and he felt like he couldn't let her go. Besides making him feel things that were scarce to him, he also truly cared for her. He really believed that being with her was a breath of fresh air.

He didn't mind that Tish had a son. He really liked Jesse, since Jesse was such a nice kid. Jesse adored all the guys, and he'd spend time with them whenever he could. Vince really liked spending time with Jesse because he really cared for the kid, not to mention spending time with Jesse seemed to help him grieve the lost time with his daughter.

Tish enjoyed seeing Vince and Jesse together. She felt like Jesse was getting time with a father figure he had lost because of people who would hopefully be left in the past. Tish didn't want to ever hear from them again, and if she did, it would be way too soon. Honestly, she didn't know how she'd react to ever dealing with them again.

She and Vince had talked a lot through the weeks they were together. She told him all about her relationship with Kurt, even the bad things, like the drugs and the fights with Courtney. He told her all about his daughter, as well as the time he spent in jail after the accident with Razzle. She didn't blame him for the man's death, considering all the things that came into play, but Vince would always blame himself.

Subconsciously, he believed that his daughter dying was God's way of punishing him for what happened to Razzle. Tish shut that down as quick as she could though. She didn't want him blaming himself for the little girl's death. It wasn't his fault, it was God's, and he needed to realize that.

"It's not your fault, Vince. Don't ever even think that. It was all God's fault. I'm not saying not to believe, but I don't understand how it works," She shook her head,"He'll save an adulterous woman, but he won't save a little girl that had her whole life to look forward to? It makes no sense, but I mean it when I say it's not your fault. It's God's, and I won't blame you if you have to scream and curse him for everything, as long as you don't blame yourself." She had told him, as she held his hands in hers.

After that emotional talk, the two became closer than they had been when they first started their relationship. Some relationships were based on sex and simple love, but not theirs. Theirs was based on love, grief, support, kindness, and so many other things. Besides, they hadn't been able to sneak off for sex, since the guys were never gone long enough for anything to happen.

She knew eventually they'd find out, but until then, they'd only ever get a few minutes together. Those few minutes were minutes that the two cherished. Sometimes they'd talk on the phone, but it couldn't be any longer than an hour. If they spent too long on the phone, Tommy would definitely grow suspicious, and they didn't want that.

They wanted to keep their relationship a secret, at least for a little longer. Secrets were sometimes dangerous, but not this one, at least, that's what they hoped. Happiness shouldn't be dangerous, not when the two truly love each other. Secrets could hurt, and they would when they were kept for too long, but they didn't plan to keep the secret forever. They just wanted to be sure of themselves and their relationship before anything happened.

The only person they were truly worried about angering was Mick. They hoped he wouldn't hate them both, but there was a chance his anger would be worse than they'd ever imagine. As long as he didn't kill them both, they'd call it a win...