Tonight (Book 2) - Zayn Malik

Chapter 36

Breakeven - The Script

When You're Gone - Avril Lavigne

Here Without You - 3 Doors Down

Where'd You Go - Fort Minor

Torn - Natalie Imbruglia

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Juliet POV

School is back in session starting tomorrow. Sarah and Niall are finally back and I feel joy - joy in getting to see the two who will be so happy... And I'm not sad to see them so happy together.

It's getting better.

I am at least.

I don't feel so dead when I'm alone, I don't feel so sad and alone as much. Liam has been a great help with that and the fact that I have been working over time at the dance studio to keep my mind off of things.

The kids are always a handful and lots of fun, they're my laughter - they're what's healing me...

Slowly.

But surely.

Seeing them laugh, to be filled with so much joy, so much hope, so much innocence - it starts to piece things back together in me.

The dancing helps, dancing out everything I feel inside until my body aches. It's the greatest escape into a world of feeling without having to feel too much.

To dance out the anger, hurt and pain. To dance to songs that brea my heart, to songs that empower me, to songs that sing about how I feel. It's all the perfect escape.

"How have things been here?" I look up from the bowl of chips that sit in my lap. Niall is bringing in the last suitcase and Sarah is sitting down next to me on their couch.

Their home seems so untouched - so quiet and somewhat empty. It's nicely decorated but it's way too neat. It feels like no one really lives here.

Of course Sarah probably scrubbed this place from corner to corner before we all left for Ireland. Sarah was the type of girl that was a mom in that way - needing to clean the house from head to toe before leaving for vacation.

For some odd reason.

I get that it's nice to come home to a clean place, but there's a limit in my mind of how much needs to be cleaned.

"As good as can be expected." I mumble, taking a chip out and staring at it before popping it into my mouth.

Sarah gives me a smile - the smile I hate getting, the smile that is the reason I refuse to tell people what happened. It's that sympathetic "I'm sorry" smile.

Yeah, I'm sorry too... Sorry this all had to happen the way it did. Sarah reaches out, resting her hand on my leg, a smile on her lips that is still as sympathetic and almost patronizing as ever.

"Do you want to start staying here? I know we briefly talked about it but-"

"No that's okay." I shake my head quickly. Seeing Sarah and Niall together happy and all brings me joy - but being around it too much may just drive me insane. I'm healing, it's getting there but being around a lovey dovey couple doesn't seem like the best idea.

"I like staying at Liam's. It's quiet, we hang out." I shrug. It's been nice getting to know Liam a little more.

Late dinners, early morning coffee - we don't usually see each other too much when there, our schedules differing quite a bit but when we do it's always friendly chatter.

I inhale deeply, relaxing onto their couch and staring at the white wall that is splattered with shadows from the sun that is managing to peak from the clouds.