Childish Tendencies

Eluding Reality

IF YOU DID NOT READ THE LAST CHAPTER, IT IS PRIVATE. FOLLOW THE NEXT STEPS TO ACCESS IT:

1) Follow me.

2) Refresh your library.

3) If it doesnt work, remove the book from your library and re-add.

It's called  How PG-13 so...you can guess what happens.

Mia

I'm not sure why I didn't tell Alia about what Jake and I talked about.

It was no doubt that what he said was true for it made perfect sense.

I am insane.

I have always been insane.

That didn't hurt as much as what I've realized.

Jake never cared for me. His personality was just a figment of my imagination and by any spectrum of thought I would not be able to redeem the bubble of fantasy he popped.

For a while I refused to believe that what he said was true by any extent, but waking up wrapped in Alia's arms, I couldn't deny the truth any further.

That is why I left her to sleep and checked myself into the institute.

It's hard, knowing that you're entire being is just a figment of your imagination. That you are not all you deemed yourself to be, not all you dreamed you would be. It's shocking, really, realizing that life isn't as you see it, but, worse is the realization that you are truly crazy.

I am not a murderer.

I did not kill my mother.

Alia thinks I killed my mother.

I don't want to tell Alia the truth, because by telling Alia the truth, I'm losing my entire personality, or what I made it to be. I'm losing all she sees me as, all she thinks of me, all she knows about me.

I have lied to her about my entire existence.

I am not a liar.

And that is why, I'm petrified to tell Alia the truth.

That she may not be attracted to me anymore.

That she may shun me when I want to be with her every second of the day.

That she wouldn't want to see me ever again because I'm a lying cheat.

That she may despise me when I love her.

I couldn't tell her the truth.

But as they say, the truth always escapes.

And the truth is,

It's not normality I want to elude, it's reality.

Alia

I'm a great at keeping secrets, I really am. I can keep most kind of secrets whether their mine, my best friends or a complete strangers.

I'm great at keeping secrets, there's just one kind of secret I can't keep to myself.

If I love someone, I have to let them know.

Keeping it inside of me seems impossible.

That's why, when I saw the note Mia left near my bed, I checked out of the hospital to tell her how I felt.

Thankfully, the rain had stopped so it the walk- or waddle because of my broken leg- was easier.

I walked into the institute and dawdled up to the counter.

"Mia Tres?" I asked the receptionist.

"You're back," she beamed, leaning over to pin the visitors pass on my chest. She winked at me, eyeing my protruding tummy before I walked away to Mia's room.

Nervousness engulfed me as I stepped into Mia's room. She sat on the floor, a half painted canvas in front of her.

Her fingers were inked with paint as she brushed away ferociously at the canvas.

"Hey," I said, sitting next to her, cross-legged.

"There's another canvas in the corner, if you want to paint with me," she said, not looking away from the canvas.

"Oh, hi to you too, Alia, how was your day?" I said, mocking her voice.

She eyed me, smiling.

"My days been good so far, what about yours, Mia?"

A giggle escaped her lips as I continued in her voice, "oh Alia, my days been great but it's better now that you're here!"

She laughed outright at that, kissing my cheek softly. "Will you paint with me?" she asked finally. I eyed the empty canvas, licking my lips at the smell of the awaiting paints. I missed the feel of the brush in my hand on the canvas.

"Yeah, I will," I whispered, grabbing the canvas and placing it in front of me. She gave me a heart warming smile and I kissed her making her plunge onto her back.

I could feel her smile against my lips as I kissed her. Slowly, I looked up, staring into her mesmerizing eyes. "Hey," she whispered, chuckling.

"Hello," I said, kissing her jaw lightly, "I love you."

"Are you singing the song or are you telling me you love me?" she asked, eyes wide.

"Both," I mumbled.

"Alia," she sighed, a tear rushing down her face, "I-i love you too, b-but, I'm not who you think I am."

Authors note-

Not the best chapter..

But oh well, it's been a long week..

Okay love you.

Bye

-Dee