depression (switch)

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⚠️‼️⚠️This story includes the topics of self harm,vapes, and the topic of suicide. If those make you uncomfortable I recommend skipping this oneshots and reading the next YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED⚠️‼️⚠️

~~colby's pov~~

"hey Sam!!" I say hugging him as he walks through the front doors of the trap house, "oh hi" he hasn't sounded the same for a few days now... "Sam?" Corey says "what" Sam doesn't sound the same at all anymore ...   he's been staying in his room all day and not even coming out to eat "well Sammy I'm making your favorite for dinner tonight!" I say pulling away from the hug "you really don't have to. I already ate" I don't believe that one bit " I'm going up to my room, I'll talk later" he walks up the stairs "guys I'm concerned about Sam.." Jake says to us all "yeah me too" the rest of us say.

The next day

We're all sitting on the couch apart from Sam and I finally hear something from his room. It sounds like a thud, but I ignore it and continue talking

30 minutes later the topic of cigarettes comes up

"speaking of that. Has anyone seen my vape?" I ask wondering where my vape went. It's been missing for days now. (Did you know he used to vape? No idea if he still does) "I think I saw Sam with one" Jake replies with. "Jake don't be silly, Sam doesn't vape..right?" Corey adds. I go up to Sam's room before knocking on the door"hey Sam? Can I come in?" No response "Sam?" I slowly open the door, I see Sam on his bed with something silver, his back is facing me so he can't see me come in, "Sam have you seen my vape anywhere??" I ask, he can't hear me though, he has his headphones on listening to what sounds to be my music taste ("emo" music). I hear light sniffles and think he's just sick "Sammy?" I say walking closer to him slowly, he's shaking..? "Sam ..are you okay?" I reach his bed and I look over his shoulder to see blood trickling down his arms, I see my vape in his lap. He puts the sliver thing down and I can see what it is now. It's a blade... He takes a hit from my vape, inhaling the smoke and then exhaling a few seconds later. I feel tears form in my eyes as I watch him pick up the blade again before dragging it on his skin once more. Causing more blood. He's about to do it again.. crap what the fuck do I do!? "SAM!" I yell from behind him, he quickly takes off his headphones and now I can hear how loud it really was. As I'm sitting on his bed Corey walks in and I stand up immediately "COREY OUT. NOW!" I yell at Corey. He closes the door and walks away "Sam.. come here" I say sitting back down "c-colby hey" he says quickly covering his arms "Sam I already saw them" he slowly uncovers his arms and the blood isn't stopping "fuck Sam those are really deep" I say holding his arm gently not caring that there's blood on my hand now "Sam I'm worried about you.. I haven't seen you eat for week and a half now"

~~sam's pov~~

What's the point in trying to hide them anymore? "I haven't seen you eat for a week and a half now"Colby says sounding genuinely concerned as he looks at my arm, "look Sam. Cutting yourself isn't okay..you stole my vape and started smoking as well? Sam this has got to stop!" I look down, looking at my arms "look Sam.. we're going to get through this together okay? I've been through what you're going through right now and it's not easy. I'm not saying I know what you're going through exactly but I want to know. So please.. talk to me. Because you're my best friend and I can't lose you- Sam are you okay?!" Half way through that I started sobbing uncontrollably. "Co-colby" I manage to get out "come here Sammy" he calls me when things are getting bad because he knows it makes me happy "I'm s-s-o sorry" I say basically jumping into his arms "it's okay Sammy.. I'm not mad at you" I start crying even more "no I'm so s-sorryy what I'm doing i-isnt oka-y" he pulls away from the hug "now. Let's go get your arms cleaned up okay?" I nod slowly before opening his bedroom door "cover your ears Sammy" "EVERYONE DOWNSTAIRS. NOW!"

~~colby's pov~~

"EVERYONE DOWNSTAIRS. NOW!" I yell so that the second floor is empty. I tap Sam's shoulder letting him know he can uncover his ears. "Okay go straight to the bathroom. I'll be there in a minute" he runs to the bathroom and closes the door. Locking it behind him, I go back into his room and I grab my vape along with the blade. I walk downstairs but not before putting the blade in my pocket "hey guys, If you hear me and Sam walking around. Get the fuck away from the area. No questions asked." I say before walking back upstairs "Sammy? Can you please unlock the door for me?" "I-is it just you?" "Yeah" I hear a click "stand back Sam" I open the door, stepping in, closing and locking it behind me. I pull the blade out of my pocket "this. Is stopping now. Got that?" I say in a serious tone. I put it in the garbage before turning back to him. "Now. Let me see your arms please" I say still seriously but with a softer tone. He reluctantly does what I say. I grab a clear bottle along with gauze. "This might hurt a tiny bit" I say putting some rubbing alcohol on the gauze. He gasps and starts shaking again slightly. "Hey hey hey, it's okay Sammy" I put polysporin on the cuts before putting a gause bandage on it. "Now. How much have you eaten in the past week and a half?" He shakes his head. "Nothing.." we walk downstairs and we hear the other guys running upstairs to their rooms. "We're alone Sammy. You don't have to hold back your feelings. I won't judge you for that" I say getting the hair out of his face "you've been passing out huh?" He nods "what would you like me to make you?"  "M-mac and cheese?" It's a simple meal but he loves it so I'll make him it.

10 minutes later

I finally finished making his Mac and cheese but he's a little dizzy "than-k yo-u" he says slurring his words " Sammy just stay awake. Here, eat this." I say handing him the Mac and cheese.

10 minutes later

"Thank you colbs" Sam says beginning to cry again "i-i just can't feel happiness anymore.. I can't even laugh, Colby I'm depressed and I'm too deep into it for me to ever come out of it again. I need help Colby and I don't think you can help me" he adds starting to sob. I run over to him and hug him tight, "oh Sammy.. look I don't fully understand why this is happening but can I at least try to understand?" Sam nods and hugs me tighter .

The next morning

I wake up with Sam in my arms fast asleep. His eyes are all red and puffy too, we stayed up late last night just talking about why he's been acting like this and what's going on. I think I fully understand what he's going through now.. "colbs?" I hear "hm?" He just snuggles closer into me "last night I let out a lot of feelings.." he says sounding nervous "that's a good thing. I know it may seem like I can't help you but if you tell me everything then I think I may be able to help you" I say softly while rubbing circles on his back. "I have these overwhelming thoughts that no one here wants me here and it's really hard to hear these thoughts when I love you and all-" "woah woah woah. You love me?" Sam goes wide-eyed as I look at him in shock "i-i am so so so so so so sorry you don't even understand-" I cut him off by kissing his lips softly, his cherry chapstick rubbing onto my lips, his fingers running through my hair.

A month later

~~sams pov~~

I wake up in the morning with two strong hands around my waist, "morning darlin" Colby says "morning love" he says in a groggy voice

I'm never gonna be sad again now that I have him-sam

HOLY SHIT THAT WAS LONG.

shout-out to userisneveronline for requesting this one!!!!

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