Amazing Spider-Man Male Reader X MCU

Birds and Bashes

Ned: You got bit by a spider? Can it bite me?

Cindy: You don't mean that same spider that bit me and you back at the lab.

Y/N: The same.

Cindy: Then how come I don't have powers?

Y/N: I don't know. And the spider's dead Ned. 

Cindy: Hey that rhymes. 

You guys walk up to the deli.

Cindy: Wow.

Ned: You were here? 

Y/N: Yeah.

Cindy: You could've died. 

Ned: Do you lay eggs?

Y/N: Ok there are so many things wrong with that question.

Later

Ned: Can you spit venom?

Y/N: No. 

Ned: Can you summon an army of spiders?

Y/N: No, Ned.

Later

Ned: How far can you shoot your webs?

Cindy: Ned, please shut up. 

Ned: I'm just saying. If I were you, I'd stand on a building and shoot as far as I could...

Cindy/Y/N: Shut up, Ned. 

Later

Ned: Do you know him too?

Y/N: Fought with and against him. Stole his shield. 

Ned: What? 

You guys watch the instructional video and do sit-ups. 

Ned: Do the Avengers have to pay taxes? What does Hulk smell like? I bet he smells nice.

Y/N: You have to shut up. 

Ned: Is Captain America cool, or is he like a mean, old grandpa? 

Y/N: Ned, just shut up. 

Ned: Hey can me and Cindy be your guys in the chair?

Y/N: Da fuq? 

Ned: Yeah. You know how there's a guy with a headset telling the other guy where to go? If you're in a burning building, I could tell you where to go. There'd be screens around me, and I could swivel around. 

Y/N: I was already in a burning building. Last year and I don't need a guy in the chair. 

Coach: Looking good L/N. 

You and Ned overhear the girls talking about you well Spider-Man. 

Ned: Y/N knows Spider-Man.

You quickly punch him in the nuts, and he recoils. 

Y/N: Fuck you Ned. No, I don't. 

Ned: They're friends.

You turn around and glare at Ned.