Amile The Queen

Chapter Eighteen

***Nambitha Makhathini***


She’s at home trying to revise her work. She’s one of those students who need to work hard to get astounding marks, and if she wants to be the first one I her family to get that degree, and to have that proper job, she has to work twice as hard as others. Her parents are not struggling, they can afford to send her to good schools, and pay for the education she deserves, but the stigma around her family, both maternal and paternal have put heavy strain on her to make it. None of her siblings made it through high school, the one who actually finished high school dropped out the first week of university. All her sisters are good at doing are popping babies and leaving them behind with her parents to take care. He won’t even mention his older brothers.
In total, there is five of them. Two sisters, two brothers. She is the last born, the last hope that maybe her parents may retire and get to enjoy the fruits of their womb, or at least her mothers womb. That’s why she works hard.
She’s so focused on her studies, she literally has no time for anything else. Yes, she occasionally parties with her friends, and does make-up as a hobby, but that was earlier in high school, now its crunch time, and the busy has started. She has never had a boyfriend too, not that no has never taken an interest to her, she is a beautiful girl, many guys have tried their luck, but boys are the last thing on her mind. Unlike her sisters, she has a clear path. The oath they made with Amile to keep themselves for marriage is still her number one pet peeve.
To encourage herself to keep her precious gem in tact, she attends the reed dance every year. Last year she missed it, and she was supposed to miss it again this year because of exams, but her heart won’t let her. She has to go. Her mother is very supportive of this initiative that she puts in into celebrating her culture and her purity, it’s every mother’s dream to have a daughter who is proud of their purity like this.
But life always has trials and tribulations right? And her stumbling block is none other than the creature of Satan called boys. She doesn’t hate them, they surround her from all angles, she just doesn’t like the boys who like her.
Prime example, a nuisance in her little boring life, Jama. She’s definitely not against boys, and she does have feelings, she has a few likes and crushes on people here and there, but it doesn’t grow into anything serious, it never does. She’s not going to deny liking him, besides his looks, she thought he was an amazing person. Besides the fact that he is 14 years older than her, she liked his charismatic personality and how well-spoken he is. But that’s all she thought she liked about him. She didn’t want anything more from him, she didn’t need anything else from him, especially a distraction.
He’s been chasing her. At this point, she even regrets giving him her number, because all he does is call her non-stop. Sometimes she doesn’t bother to answer, but he gets persistent, and it annoys her. She answers to get him off her back. Some men are brave, what makes him think that he stands a chance with her, she doesn’t even know his name. He’s calling now, and she dreads talking to him, but she answers anyway.
“MaXulu.”
“Bhuti please, you are distracting me.”
“Bhuti?” she rolls her eyes.
“It’s not like you ever told me your name.” she says with attitude.
“Come out so I can tell you my name.” she’s shocked.
“What?” she asked peeping out the window of her bedroom. Her impulsiveness forced her to do that, know very well that all she sees from her bedroom window is a boring wall.
“I’ll tell you my name, come out.” She has to see this with her own two eyes, that’s the only reason why she’s going out.
“How do you know where I live?” she’s on a frantic search for her shoes.
“I have my ways  I don’t like to be kept waiting MaXulu, I’m counting to ten.” The line dies. This is unbelievable.
“Sdudla, I’m coming back, don’t leave the house.” She said as she walked passed her ten year old niece who was concentrating on the TV. She barely even heard what was said to her. She just gave a low okay and continued with her cartoon watching. The gate is locked because the parents are away and on thing her mother always preaches is, “keep the gate locked, we don’t want any surprises.” That is a low key hint that no visitors allowed. Announced or not. This man right here, he’s a surprise.
It doesn’t take her a long time to spot the Golf 7 parked a few houses away. At least he’s somewhat respectful of her home. He standing leaning against the car cross legged with a cigarette between his lips. Red flag number one, a man that smokes a cigarette to the size of a stompie. She shook her head in displeasure when he threw it on the ground and stomped on it.
“Waqhamuka usunikina ikhanda nje MaXulu?” (Why at you shaking your head MaXulu?) she’s not afraid of him.
“Indoda ebhema ugwayi ayibukeki, ayithandeki nje futhi.” (A man who smokes cigarettes doesn't look good, he’s not loveable.) He chuckled.
“So it’s a good thing that you love me.” She blushed and felt something light and feathery in her stomach, but she quickly looked away. He got her.
“Did you lose something on this side of town bhuti?” she crossed her arms across her chest and tapped her foot on the ground impatiently.
“Yes, the love of my life.” She rolled her eyes.
“I don’t think she’s here. Can I go back home?”
“Ima phela MaXulu. I haven’t told you my name, that’s what you came out here for.”
“Yet you stand here and waste my time.” He laughed.
“Okay. Get in the car. I have a little gift for you.” She’s hesitant, but he’s not budging. That look tell her that she has no choice but to get in the car and receive the gift, whatever it may be.
He opened the passenger door for her and she climbed in. It’s a beautiful car, and it suits him terribly. It is so clean, it smells fresh from the car wash and the smell of his expensive cologne is competing with the car perfume. We can say that the cologne is winning. He got in on his side and leaned back and took a Woolworths bag and handed it to her.
“What’s this?” she asked looking through it.
It was snacks, sweets, chips, a tub of ice-cream and cookies.
“Snacks for when you study.” She looks up and he’s smiling at her.
“Thank you.” That’s all she can say. Now she feels bad for being mean.
She put the bag by her feet and played with her fingers. Where is miss attitude now?
“I don’t want to get you in trouble with your parents so I won’t keep you for too long. Can I see you tomorrow?” her eyes met with his.
“I’m leaving tomorrow.”
“And what about Saturday?” His hand is hesitating to hold hers, she can see it hovering over hers.
“I’m going to the reed dance this weekend.” Even better!
“Kwakuhle lokho MaXulu. I’ll take you. I wouldn’t want my love squashed up like sardines in bus.” She chuckled.
“I’m fine being squashed up in the bus, thank you. I don’t trust men like you.” He also chuckled.
“Kulungile phela, kodwa nami nginegunye lokukhetha njalo intombi. Usungisizile ke we MaXulu, sengiyazi nje ukuthi nginesithandwa sami esingilindile.” (That's fine, but I also have a right to choose a wife at the Reed dance. You have helped me, MaXulu, I just know I have the love of my life waiting for me there.) Her heart sank to the pit of her stomach.
She chose to ignore him and look up. There was a lanyard hung on the rear view mirror and on it hung a card. She pulled it and read it aloud:
“Nkululeko Clive Dlamini, 30 years old. UNISA. You are studying?” she still wants to laugh about his second name, but she’ll hold it in.
“Don’t I look like a student?” she rolled her eyes.
“Nkululeko. It suits you.” She said absent-mindedly. That put a massive smile on his face.
“Really. I think Dlamini would sound amazing against yours.” She’s blushing again, and this time, she’s not hiding it.
“Clive, I need to go. Thank you for the snacks.” He laughed.
“Kubonga mina MaXulu.” She opened the car door.
“Hug nyana?” he asked giving her the softest eyes.
“Sobonana emhlangeni Nkululeko.” (We’ll see each other at the Reed dance.)
“Don’t make me regret telling you my name nana.” Her insides melted. Where did that come from!?
“Bye Jama.” She got out of the car and carried her bag as she walked down the street back home.
Playing hard to get is going to be hard now. He’s too charming.





***Amile Gumede***


He disappeared to the bathroom and now I’m sitting on the bed waiting for him to come back. He waltz back in topless and smiles at me.
“Nap time?” I stand on my tippy toes and wrap my arms around his neck.
“Nope.” He was brushing his teeth. He’s compulsive like that. He brushes his teeth after every meal. I don’t know how to keep up with him.
“Then what are we doing?” he grabbed my bum and pressed me against his body.
“This.” I rubbed myself against his front and he groaned.
“You naughty girl.” He picked me up.
“Zulu.” I looked at him in the eyes.
“Yebo sthandwa sami.” He can see that I want something.
“Can you please make love to me.” That on its own was hard to say. He caressed my cheek.
“Amile.” He hesitated.
“This is what I want, please. Just give me what I want.”
“Are you sure?” he asked again.
I’m obviously on the verge of tears, but he’s still asking me such questions. What kind of man deprives himself like this?
“Yes, I’m sure.” Hes still hesitant, but I kiss him anyway.
He helps me take off my sweater and throws it on the sofa by the window. He throws me in the bed and I use my feet to pull down his pants. He gives me a deep throat groan, his eyes are turning red and are shrinking into slits. I won’t even begin to speak about his manhood, its doing the exact opposite of shrinking. He looks ready to attack.
He starts with the straps, and works the back like magic. He lies me on my back and lifts my knees. I’m not scared, partly because he’s seen this view a thousand times, but I’m not scared because I love him, and I’m ready to do this with him. 
My leg involuntarily starts to shake as he climbs on top of me.
“You can always tell me to stop of you aren’t ready sthandwa sami.”
“I want this as much as you do Nkosi.” He looks scared. Shouldn’t I be scared.
I’m lying naked under him, and he already his hip flexed, his manhood pointing up by his naval. With my eyes closed, I grab is and stroke it a few time. He closes his eyes and arches his head back in pleasure, giving out low moans of pleasure. He started kissing my breasts and massaged my nipples, my soft spot. Now I’m ready for the real thing. He positioned himself at my entrance and I wrapped my arms around his frame. I felt my walls expand, and shit load of pain as his girth filled me up. I pushed him back. I have an extremely low pain tolerance and I have never felt anything so painful.
He didn’t budge, he rolled off me and held me in his arms tightly. Okay, I can do this.
“Try again.” He’s breathing heavily, and I was almost on the verge of tears.
“No, I don’t want to hurt you.” He sounds concerned.
“You won’t hurt me Nkosi, I want this.” He got off the bed and he looked for his pants.
“Did you not just scream under me and push me off, I hurt you Amile and that’s not what I want. That was nothing, it hurts way worse when I go all the way in. No.” he looks pissed. I’ve never been so conflicted my whole life.
“But I want this, I want you.”
“I know you want me Amile, and I want you to, but you aren’t ready. Don’t force yourself to be when you aren’t. I’m not!” okay, he’s shouting, something I’ve never seen him do. I seriously fucked up.
“I’m just afraid Nkosi.” I said lowly. Now the tears are starting.
“Then wait, I’m doing it, it doesn’t kill me, why can’t you…”
“No, I’m not afraid of that, I’m afraid of losing you.” His eyes soften.
“You won’t lose me Amile. What makes you think you will lose me.” He comes to sit back on the bed. What a way to ruin everything Amile.
“I have dreams of another man, and he constantly has sex with me in my dreams. I’m in love with him in these dreams, but he isn’t you. That’s what I’m afraid of. That I will lose you to some man I don’t know.” I’m crying now. This affects me more than I make it out to be, it’s a serious matter.
“Why didn’t you tell me all this time, do you know him?” he asked concerned.
“No, I don’t. But I call him the king. I don’t want him, I want you.” My heart is racing, so is his, I can feel it against my ear on his chest.
“I need to take you to the palace.” My eyes widened like saucers.
“What!? No, I can’t go there, what business do I have there.” My voice is breaking now. What happened to the normal life I had 5 months ago?
“I refused to listen to MaMzobe. Maybe she was right.” I frowned.
“Right about what?” he smiled.
“Maybe you are my chosen one.” Did he not hear a word I said?
“And the dreams?” he shook his head.
“I don’t know sthandwa sami, angazi.” He kissed my forehead and stood up to go to his drawer.
Why is he downplaying the seriousness of this issue?
“The ancestors are never wrong, and if my mother is visiting you, then it means you are deserving of this.” He turned with a box in his hand and he kneeled in front of me. He popped it open and inside was a beautiful diamond ring. I panicked.
“Nkos…” he interrupted me.
“I know, you aren’t ready, you are young and you want to finish school first, but I’m not standing in the way of that. I love you, and I want you to achieve all you dreams, but I want to be by your side.”
“Nkosi…” again I was interrupted.
“I’ve been wanting to do this for a long time, all I needed was courage. I need you to say yes MaGumede.” My brain is not working at this point.
“Nkosi I can’t.” His face fell.
“No listen to me. It’s not that I don’t want to marry you, I do, but that wasn’t part of my plans now. Marriage is no where in my plans Nkosi and I love you, very much, but I’m not ready. Next thing you will be asking me for kids, something I can’t give you.” He closed the box and stood up.
“Don’t leave.” I stood up too.
“I’m not thinking straight Amile, there’s a lot going on in my head right now.” He said and paced around the room.
“Okay, maybe I should come to the palace.” He stopped pacing and looked at me. I’m still completely naked just so you know.
“I’m going to KwaNongoma these holidays to visit my grandmother. She also wanted to get to the bottom of these dreams, I don’t know what she wants to do to me.” He was pacing again, and he’s making me dizzy now.
“Come to the reed dance.” I frowned. He stopped pacing.
“Why?” I went to the couch and took the hoodie I was wearing and threw it on.
“So you can meet my family.” Oh no, sorry.
“I can’t.” I sat on the bed.
“Why can’t you Amile?” okay, it’s frustrated Nkosi now.
“I have major social anxiety, large groups of people scare me, I can’t surrounded by so many strangers.” He gave me that look.
“This is your culture, it’s not just some game.”
“It’s not mine, it’s yours.” Okay, now we are arguing. I don’t like this.
“Manje ufuna ukwenzenjani ke?” (So what do you want to do?)
“You’ll fetch me like your girlfriend and take me to the palace, why do you want to complicate things?” he sighed and rubbed his forehead.
“Fine. I’m leaving later tonight.” He spoke in a breathy tone.
“I’m leaving tomorrow.”
Silence passed between the two of us for a while and then he came and sat next to me.
“I don’t want to lose you too.” He said.
I laid my head on his shoulder and breathed out. What was I doing. Our relationship is perfect, I have the love of a man that many don’t have, that many dream of. A man who is patient with me, who cares and loves me for who I am. Why am I not doing the same.
“I was selfish, I’m sorry.” I said lowly.
“I will never force you to do something you aren’t ready for sthandwa sami. “
I hugged him tightly. Now I owe him.
“Do you want a blowjob?” I asked looking at him. He nodded.
Not everything will work out the way it should, but that’s life right?
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After a long day of failed sex attempts and rejected proposals, I’m finally home. I found mom at home for a change and I was quite shocked. She didn’t harass me about my whereabouts though, but I found her pacing Siviwe’s suitcase.
“Have you packed, we are leaving early tomorrow? Ugogo wants you to prepare for the Reed dance.” My eyes bulged out.
“What!?”
“Yindaba, wababaza ibhadi, lomfana usengenile yini esibayeni sami?” (What’s wrong? Why are you exclaiming, has this boy invaded my palace?) she raised her eyebrow.
“No mama, but why didn’t you tell me earlier.” She has to be joking.
“Your granny only told me today. I didn’t even know it was on Saturday. She said she already spoke to iqhikiza lendawo and she saved you a spot.” Someone shoot me now.
“And what about my dreams mama, that was the only reason why I’m going to KwaNongoma.”
“Angikwazi utetemiswa yini kangaka ngokuya emhlangeni. Its not anything terrible. It’s not like the king will choose you, you are already dating the Prince.” (I don’t know what’s bothering you so much about attending the Reed dance.) She doesn’t get it.
But I can’t get away from my mother she has the final say in what happens in my life. I am technically still under her supervision and what ever she says goes, and if she says fuck my social anxiety, then fuck it. Lord I’m not looking forward to this at all.