Other Half- N.B & D.D

Chapter 23: Working On It

Dixie's POV:

"Dixie, what do you think is causing all the problems between the two of you?" Noah and I were seated in front of the therapist. The best one in the state. We both agreed that we needed to get on the same page to make sure things work. There was a lot more to our relationship than the whole thing with Griffin. It starts from the moment we became best friends.

"To be completely honest, everything that led up to this point. We started on the wrong foot." The night that everything clicked, may have been one of the best nights of my life, along with one of the most complicated. It's not every day that you can say you had drunken sex with your best friend of so many years.

"Would you care to elaborate?" I looked over at Noah to see him shaking his head. Therapy was my idea. He hated the thought of talking to other people about our problems. Luckily for me and my amazing ability to persuade, Noah easily agreed. He wasn't too thrilled about it though.

"Well, I was in a relationship at the time, and I did the very wrong thing of cheating on the person I was with. I didn't want to hurt him, and as a result, I hurt all three of us." I could tell she had her opinions on the situation as soon as I stopped talking. Of course, she couldn't voice them out loud, but her expressions spoke louder than any words.

"And Noah." She looked over at Noah's unamused face. "How did you feel while she was still with this other guy?" He sat up straight. Talking about his problems to anyone, besides me, was always a struggle for him. He liked to be looked at as a role model, and he thought displaying his problems out in the open, would ruin that.

"I felt like shit to be absolutely honest." I could tell he was going to pour everything out once he let go of my hand and crossed both of his in his lap. "I had told myself all those years that I felt nothing, and I didn't. Then one night happens, and it's like she got stuck in my system forever."

Besides the night of the accident, I never really understood how Noah felt the whole time. But even now, I'm learning more. Every bone in my body breaks every time I think about how much I hurt him. "Next thing I knew, she was asked to choose, and she couldn't."

I looked down at the floor, not daring to look into his hurting eyes. he still came back to me though, I thought. I hurt him, and he still came back for me. "I knew I should've left as soon as I wasn't her first choice, but I couldn't. I would look into her eyes, and I was instantly trapped."

I soaked in his words, every one of them stabbing me in the heart. I didn't realize how much we truly had to work on until he began to pour out everything that he felt. "Why do you think you felt that way? What was so special about Dixie that you just couldn't leave?"

He took a moment to think about what he would say next. This couldn't have been easy for him. Fuck, it wasn't easy for me either, and I'm not even the one who had to feel like a constant second choice.

"It was the same things that brought me to be so close with her in the first place." I looked up to see a slight smile that made its way onto his face. "How smart she was. How, no matter who was in the room, she could voice her opinions and how she felt. How her eyes become lighter when she smiles. Her dimples. Pretty much everything about her. She's an angel. Even when she was repeatedly stabbing me in my heart."

His words echoed in my ear, traumatizing me. The same way I feel right now, he felt like for months. Months. And yet, he came back to me. He keeps coming back to me.

"How do you feel about what he just said? Does it hurt knowing this is how you made him feel?" Teardrops fell from my eyes, the salty taste intruding my mouth.

"I guess I never really stopped to think about how he felt and what he thought. It pains me incredibly knowing that I made him feel trapped and unloved." He looked over at me, apology covering all of his features. "No." I turned to him, grabbing his hand.

"Don't you dare feel bad for finally telling me everything that you felt during that time? You may have left, and I may have gotten into that accident, but that will never add up to how much hurt I caused you."

I looked back over to the therapist. She seemed happy. I guess that meant progress was being made. "Noah, how do you feel about what she just told you? Does it make you feel any better?" He let go of my hand, now sitting in a more comfortable position with his leg over his knee, and his arms spat out across the sofa.

"I guess." Was all that he replied with. The say the least, I was confused. I knew my words weren't going to make him feel much better, I guess I just didn't expect him to be so blatant about it. "What do you think she could do to make the situation better."

From how quickly he answered, I had assumed he knew the answer to this question all along. I guess the question I'm asking now is. Why wouldn't he just tell me?

"I want us to move on. Start fresh. Obviously, I can't expect us to forget the last few months, but all I'm saying is that during those times, everything was so complicated. I couldn't get caught up in the moment without being insecure about knowing she was saying the same things to a different man."

I knew how Noah felt to a certain extent. Especially the night of the accident. I just never really realized how hurt he was by the words I used to try and make him feel better. "Dixie, how does this make you feel? Are you willing to start fresh?"

I thought about what she said, and how much commitment it would take for the both of us to get into a good, and healthy place. And it all came down to one question. Do I love him enough to keep fighting?

"I'm willing to do everything and anything to make it work." The answer was yes. It would and always will be yes. "You do understand that this will be a difficult process for the both of you and that there will be moments where you would want to give up, yes?"

We both looked at each other for approval before nodding. There was no guarantee that this was going to be easy, but if I can, I will do everything in my power to stay with the one person I love most in this world.

"Great! Let's start."

———

"So, how do you think that went?" I asked, setting my stuff down in the kitchen. Therapy lasted 2 hours. We practiced exercises. Talked about our problems and how we left. A few tears were also dropped here and there, but hey, trust the process, right.

"I think it's an awesome start. We clearly have a lot we need to work on, but it's worth it if I have you in my life." His hands were brought down to my waist, pulling me closer. "I agree." I smiled, wrapping my arms around him. "Do you think we're gonna be able to do this?"

I asked, quite eager to see what he was going to reply with. "I think that if we really want to, we could do and get through anything." I leaned my head on his chest while he swayed us back and forth. "Do you, really want to?" I mumbled.

"More than anything." He replied, holding me tighter than before. Even after everything we've been through, his hugs hold the same amount of comfort and provide the same amount of sanity as before.

"I love you, Beck." I pulled apart, grabbing his cheek. "I love you more, Damelio." He whispered, kissing my lips softly before picking me off the ground, wrapping his hands around my waist while my legs hooked onto his torso.

It brought me back to the night that started it all. Before all the problems came flooding in. Before, when it was just two people that loved each other, expressing how much compassion they hold for one another. It felt good to be living that life again. Even if it was just for one night. And even if I knew that the next day we would have to go back to resolving everything.

Right now, it was just his hands on my body, bringing me the pleasure that my body has begged and longed for, for months, that mattered. Right now, it was perfect. We would worry about it later when we got there.

"You sure about this?" He whispered, his hands already undoing the buttons of my shirt. "So sure." I replied, already so needy for what was to come.

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HOLLAAA!! I hope you guys enjoyed this chapp!! I know that I enjoyed writing itt!! I love you all. XOXO<3

Word Count: 1600