Throat Knife | Y.Jw

Epilogue

The wind blew through my hair as I listened to the sound of waves crashing against the sides of the boat we had managed to get sailing in Yeosu. Yeonjun had insisted on sailing the boat whilst everyone else rested around.

I knew Sunoo was with Lin down under the deck while she was trying to recover from a gunshot in her left thigh, from the day the Alliance showed up at the last house. Jake was probably keeping Niki company while Soomin most likely was trying to keep her mind busy by either cooking or sitting and tying knots on a small rope she had found yesterday.

I was out alone on the deck, trying to daze off into my own world by the sound of the waves and the wind brushing by. Desperately trying to erase the happening a week ago. It was even a miracle they let some of us survive.

A small sigh escaped my mouth as I dug my hands into the pocket of the hoodie I hadn't taken off since that day, I had been trying to convince myself that it still smelled like him. Even though it mostly smelled like sweat and dirt by now.

The moment my hands reached into the pocket I felt something crunch under my fingers, a frown immediately growing on my face as I pulled out a piece of paper. How come I not notice it was there before?

I quietly unfolded the paper to see a messy and rushed handwriting across the paper, but there was no doubt of who it belonged to. I quietly sighed before rubbing my eyes with one hand, trying to stay calm.

I'm sorry if you ever have to find this in my shirt, because I know that means that I haven't been around to take this note out again. 

Hopefully you can read my small message, it's been years since I wrote anything but now is the time.

I know I promised to stay with you, that I promised not to leave. Yet I did. You have every right to be mad at me and you have every right to be sad. Just promise me one thing. Stay safe and alive for as long as possible, the day you can't do that anymore it's alright, I'll be waiting for you. I'll always be waiting.

This is the part of the small letter that I realize how extremely bad I am at words, sorry.

I hope you know I love you and that I am sorry for all the times I've hurt you. Please move on and find your smile again.

-The Stupid Boba Boy

A small smile spread on my face as I quickly blinked away my tears and stood up once again before turning towards the water. The letter still in hand. 

For a second I contemplated it would be quite trashy of me to do, but I had to let go and the earth can't be more destroyed than it already is. Us humans already ruined it to endless measures.

Sucking in a deep breath I closed my eyes and opened my hand, letting the letter fly out of my hand and away, probably disappearing immediately.

Now all I had to do was let go of him.