¯\_(ツ)_/¯ I don't know what my life is anymore okay?
Character: New Zealand, Australia, America, Canada, Britain, France, Russia
New Zealand: let's see what's in this door!
New Zealand: *opens door to reveal Australian Outback*
New Zealand: Australia!
~~~
Canada: shouldn't we have a plan?
America: who needs a plan? I have a gun!
Canada: a gun is not a plan!
~~~
Australia: I bought a bag of 144 pairs of vampire teeth
New Zealand: did you pay rent?
Australia, with vampire teeth in his mouth: what the hell is rent
~~~
America: bitches b like "I'm baby" but have childhood trauma and neglect like wtf do you know about being baby u were forced to grow up at a young age anyway I'm bitches
~~~
Australia: I lost the game
New Zealand: I lost the game
Canada: I lost the game
America: What's the game?
Canada: The game is where you don't think about the game and if you think about the game you lose and if you lose you have to say so
America:
America, angrily: I lost the game
~~~
New Zealand: They're making another planet earth
Australia, condescendingly: And where are they getting the dirt for it?
New Zealand:
New Zealand: I meant the nature documentary
~~~
Australia: Sometimes "brb" stands for "be ready bitch".
Australia: So, be careful.
~~~
Genie: And for your third wish?
Australia, with two lemon trees: Take a wild fucking guess, buddy.
~~~
Canada: How do I deal with my enemies?
America: Nuke them.
Canada: ...That's a bit extreme, I was hoping for a more passive solution.
America: Nuke them only a little?
~~~
Canada: why am I the one who has to be a responsible role model for Australia and New Zealand?
America: *walks into the room wearing a leather jacket* hey
Canada: oh, that's why
~~~
New Zealand, pretending to be a therapist: so what seems to be troubling you today?
Australia, swirling chocolate milk around in a wine glass: I'm just over it, y'know?
~~~
Britain: you only attract what you fear.
America:
America: oh no, I'm so scared of a million dollars right now!
~~~
Australia: my school just gave everyone free iPads!
America: my college just gave me free debt
~~~
Australia: Hey Canada wanna play a game with us?
Canada: what's the game?
New Zealand: it's called "Russia or Food." I tell you things America has said, and you have to guess if he said it to Russia, or two his food.
Canada: doesn't sound too hard?
New Zealand: you sure? First quote: "I would die for you."
Canada:
Canada: ᴄʀᴀᴘ
~~~
Australia: Oops! I'm delightful!
Britain: I wish I had that kind of self confidence at your age, Australia. We could all learn a thing or two from you
Australia: Thanks. I can shut down each of my organs through "power of will" alone
~~~
Australia, aggressively stomping on a a bug: DIE!!
Canada: ...is he okay?
New Zealand: Yeah, he's fine
Australia, crying as he realizes what he's done: Oh no! He's dead! WHAT HAVE I DONE?!
New Zealand: *bringing over a plate of fairy bread and wrapping an arm around Australia* It's okay, I'm here
America, entering the room: oh no.
America: did Aussie kill a bug again?
~~~
Canada: don't break someone's heart, they only have one
America: break their bones instead, they have 206 of those
Canada:
Australia: or you could date a worm, they've got five!
Canada: bro
~~~
Canada: Mom, I got a paper cut...
France: awh, come here baby... mommy's going to make it all better!
America: hey so funny story I broke my arm-
France: put a bandaid on it
America: but-
France: did I stutter?
YOU ARE READING
CountryHumans Incorrect Quotes
Fanfictionyeah uhm.... enjoy some skits, as me and my friends call them. I don't even know what characters are gonna be in here so.... hope it's good! Updates are slow but they will happen!! Also Disclaimer I don't support any of the bad things in this book i...
