The Séance • Marvel

Civil War: Chapter 04

Things with Jo only lasted two months. Vanessa was already not very good at relationships as she had never really been in a serious one. At first, things had been going fine. They'd gone on three dates, all of which had gone great. But, Jo was looking for something serious and that alone freaked Vanessa out. She'd began to doubt herself, telling herself that she wasn't good enough for Jo and that she had too many problems to ever make it work. In the end, the two of them called it quits and went their separate ways. Which was a pity because Vanessa really did like Jo.

Even before she'd called it quits with Jo Vanessa had begun to struggle a lot. She had been happy for a while, having someone who was there for her in more ways than one. She hated that anything good that happened to her she would ruin it.

Things were out of control, everything was falling apart even more. At one point the sedatives that she was taking were no longer strong enough and she had resorted to taking stronger things. The current problem was that her drug dealer had gotten caught for selling illegal drugs and now she was having trouble finding someone who sold what she was looking for. So she was dealing with shakiness and headaches because of the withdraw. Weed didn't seem to do anything anymore.

That day she went into work in a bad mood. She'd had yet another argument with Jason about seeking help, to which she kept saying she didn't have a problem. She walked straight to the bar and poured herself a shot of tequila. "You ok Nes," asked Roxxy, the owner. She had taken an appreciation for the young woman and even she'd notice how much the girl was struggling. "Yeah, I uh... have a slight cold. That's it." "Come with me Vanessa," said the older woman as she led Vanessa into her office.

Vanessa sighed and walked into the office. She already knew what was going to happen, she had been through this about a hundred times. "You're firing me?" Vanessa stated. "No, I'm not. At least not yet. Look Vanessa I see the way you look, the way you act. I know what it feels like, I've been there. Do you know why I hired you? It wasn't because of your excellent bartender skills, no. I hired you because I saw myself in you. Struggling to get by, taking everything you can get your hands on. My brother also went through the same thing and he didn't come out of it. It was his death that made me realize that I needed to get help. I don't want you to have to go through that or be the one who ends up like him. Get help, go to rehab. You might not believe this but there are better things out there than getting high" the woman said.

Vanessa placed her head in her hands, she did not want to go through this again. Last time everyone encouraged her to get clean, said they would be there to help her and then in end, they all left. "I've already done this. Got clean for a couple of months, with the help of some people I knew, then suddenly they all up and left. And I just fell right back down the rabbit hole" Vanessa explained. Deep down she knew that she couldn't just blame them for falling back into her habits. That had been entirely her fault, but she always found it easier to say that it was because of them that she failed rather than admit she had a problem. "Well, maybe they were not the right people. I know a place where they can help you, professionally. Think about it, because how long do you think you can continue this before your body decides no more? I'm no expert but by the way, you don't flinch when taking tequila shots I can tell you've been drinking for a while. All I'm asking is that you think about it."

Vanessa walked to the back room, where the alcohol was stored. "You've been rather quiet," she said. "What's the point of talking you don't listen anymore," said Jason. "What do you think I should do? You think she's right?" She asked. "I'm not doing this again Vanessa. This constant cycle of getting clean only to fall back when it gets too hard. This will be the third time you're doing this. I'm not telling you what to do, because I've come to the realization that you need to make the decision on your own in order for it to work. You need to want this. The other two times, I pushed you to say yes, to getting help, and both times you failed. You already know what I think, you know what I want for you. But what do you want for yourself?" He asked her.

Vanessa leaned against the cold wall. What did she want? All her life she'd just wanted the voiced to stop, to go away. The only solution she'd found was drugged because there wasn't another way. Right? She'd thought back to her training with Wanda. And as much as she hated it, meditation really did help. Clearing her mind in order to create a barrier between the living world and the dead. She'd only been clean for a few months before getting back to her habits. She didn't even try to explore the range of her powers. How much could she really do?

But, as curious as she was about her powers, they mostly frightened her. Most of the dead people she could see were not very nice. Murderers, serial killers, terrorists, and other horrible things. All of them are afraid or unable to move on because of what awaits them in the beyond. What if she could find a way to block them, to never have to see those types of ghosts ever again. Could it be worth it? Getting help this time would not be about anyone pushing her, but about pushing herself. Vanessa focused on the coldness of the wall, thinking about her options. Slowly she pushed herself off the wall and walked back to Roxxy's office. She finally understood that maybe the world wasn't against her. That maybe she was her worst enemy after all. She walked in and nodded, "I have a problem and I need help."