Unscripted (Jack & Crutchie)

Chapter 8 - Drawings

Criticism spot :)

Crutchie's POV

I woke up and found myself with Jack still holding me. I didn't want to wake him, so I decided I'd stay there until he woke up. I listened to his heartbeat steadily and felt his chest rise and fall. I closed my eyes again, wanting to focus on listening to his breathing. I was still really shaken up from the day before, but his breathing helped me to calm down. 

After a few more minutes, I heard him sigh deeply. I brought my head back a little bit to look up at him, and saw that he had woken up.

"Oh I'm sorry, did I wake you?" He said, looking back at me.

"You didn't, I've been awake for a little bit." I replied, smiling at him. 

He played with my hair for a while before he got up and began to get himself ready for the day. I wanted to sell papes today too, because I knew that if I didn't Jack would end up paying for my food and such. I put my hands on the ground to try to sit myself up and felt pain shoot through my arms. I grunted a bit from both the pain and trying to get up, and Jack quickly turned to look at me.

"What're ya doing?" He said, coming over to me and kneeling down.

"Well I should sell today. I'm low on money-"

"Crutchie you are in no shape to sell papes like that. You have to lay down." My arms began to shake a bit as I was feeling weak and couldn't hold myself up anymore. Jack noticed and put his arm around my back, holding me up. 

"I'm sorry," I said, tears forming in my eyes. It was always really hard for me to not feel guilty when Jack had to do things for me.

"Stop. You have nothing to be sorry for." He said. He set me up against the railing, as I wanted, and continued to get ready. I kept my head down and cried silently, not wanting Jack to know.

It wasn't long before he was ready for the day and walked over to me, I assume to check my cuts and bruises. 

"I know you don't like it, but we have to ch..." he paused for a moment, studying me. "... Are you crying?" I nodded my head, beginning to cry harder. "Why? Does the way you're sitting hurt?" I shook my head, and could feel him looking at me still. I turned my head slightly to look at him, and saw how worried he was. I sighed deeply and shook my head once more.

"I just..." I said. After a few moments, I didn't know if I should continue or not.

"You can tell me. It's okay." Jack brushed my hair away from my eyes so he could see my face better. 

"I just want to die." I said, beginning to cry harder. Jack sat still for a second before bringing me close to him, hugging me close.

"Why, Crutchie?" He said, holding me tighter.

"I just feel so useless. I couldn't even fight off the Delancey's. I couldn't. I tried to run away but I fell right back down. I can't take care of myself anymore. I can't even get down the ladder myself. I can't even walk by myself." I rambled, grabbing onto Jack's shirt as I did. We sat in silence for a moment, and I felt bad for saying all of that. I wish I could take it back.

"Crutchie..." Jack took a deep breath before he continued, "you aren't useless. Who would be able to fight off two guys like them when you didn't even see it coming? I know I wouldn't a been able to." He began running his fingers through my hair as he spoke. "You aren't any less of a fella just because of some ankle. If anything, I think it makes you stronger." I looked up at him, still breathing hard.

"... How?"

"Think about it, Crutch." He looked at me, smiling a bit. "How many fellas out there could go out and sell papes like you? How many wouldn't even try to climb a ladder? How many of em wouldn't even try, like you do?" I looked at him, smiling a little bit. He always knew how to make me feel better. "Not to mention, I thought..." He took a deep breath, looking as though he was trying to figure out how to say what he was thinking. "I thought I lost you yesterday. But you fought. You fought so hard. And you did it." He smiled at me again, and I smiled back. After a few moments, I fully hugged him, even though it hurt to move.