Call Me Romantic (BxB)

Chapter 30

{ꔫ NASH ꔫ }

Val settles next to Nash, and they smile at each other. She puts down her plate on the candy cane-themed tablecloth. It's a colder day, but that doesn't stop Christmas from happening. Nash is wearing a t-shirt and Christmas PJ pants. He wears them every Christmas, and by now, it's like a tradition. It feels odd not to wear them. The pants are purple with Santa's sleeve patterns. The purple matches his hair well with the deep purple. 
 
"How have you been feeling?" she asks. “No panic attacks?”
 
"Fine," Nash answers, which is half the truth. Nash had no panic attacks, surprisingly, but the police didn't sound very happy with him. They are planning to go to court and plead self-defense and innocence, even though Nash knows he saved someone he feels felt in it. He never hit someone, let alone made someone pass out. 
 
 
Val heard what happened, and it spread like wildfire. This town is small, so things like that can easily be mixed around. Hell, there's a rumor that Nash killed Todd, but that's not true since he's being prepared for court, and the news showed him being arrested. People are on their toes to wonder why the boy Sam punched a month ago saved him from his abusive father. 
 
Just a month ago, there was a video circling the school with Nash getting punched. It was quickly brushed off and forgotten, but now it'll probably resurface, and the thought of that makes Nash lose his appetite. He forces himself to stomach the thought of it. 
 
He has been fighting every urge to text Sam every 10 minutes, checking up on him. Spending Christmas Eve at a hospital with your beaten mom must not be very jolly. Though he knows he wouldn't be able to drag Sam out of there anyway, he doesn't even try. Nash would do the same. Honestly, he wouldn't leave his mother if one of them were hurt, too. 
 
Ember, Sienna, and Sienna's parents sit down at the table with all the food with Val and Nash. Everyone helps themselves with ham, corn, and gravy. Once settled, Sienna lights a candle that is placed in the middle of the table next to the white vase. Nash feels like he'll never look at vases the same again. 
 
"So, Mom, did you know Natalie has a boyfriend?" Sienna starts looking at Nash's grandma, Ann. Sienna unclips her blond locks and puts the pink clip at the hem of her shirt before resting in the chair. They don't know that Nash is transgender, and Nash would rather hide it from them than have a come-out dinner that can go wrong. Plus, it's the thought that his grandparents may not have a strong enough heart for that, even though that's bullshit. 
 
Nash closes his eyes. Here we go. The questions are always the same. Val went through it, too, when she started dating Mark. Val shifts in her seat uncomfortably, glancing at Nash with a warning before turning back to her water. 
 
"You have a boyfriend?" Nash's grandpa asks, his gray eyebrows lifting. He's an older man with wrinkles and a droopy face. wearing an ugly Christmas, and his hair is crystal white. 
 
"Unfortunately," Ember mumbles as she rests her hand on her cheek. Sienna shoots her a look, sitting up straight, before adding, "Yes, he does. They are on the same lacrosse team."
 
Nash's grandma looks at Nash. She looks confused, with a tight frown on her face. "They have girls and guys on the same team now?" she asks.
 
Nash can tell Sienna is sweating from her slip-up, but he saves it, waving his hand to dismiss her comment. "Yeah, they want to try something new. They believe if it's equally distributed, then girls and boys can get along more.” he lies. He's good at lying. His grandma nods but doesn't seem convinced it's a good idea. If Nash has to be honest, he's surprised they don't notice he's trans, or maybe they do and don't want to accept it, so they avoid the thought of it.
 
It happens a lot. But Nash has been on testosterone for a while; his voice is way deeper, and he binds his chest. Or maybe they won't ever see him as a boy. There's a voice again that he pushes to the back of his head. Not now. Not in front of them. He stomachs that as well, chewing on the tender ham.
 
"Is he nice?" Ann asks, her voice a soft rasp. 
 
"Yes."
 
"Where does he live?" 
 
"Next door." 
 
Grandma makes a face and shifts her old eyes toward Sienna, who just shrugs. She doesn't think anything is wrong with it, but it seems like Sienna's mom thinks differently. Grandpa blinks, “Isn't that the boy you saved?’ 
“Yes.” Nash replies dryly, “I don't want to talk about it.”
 
"So.." Grandpa changes the topic; there's this haunted look on his face that screams, *I know everything about you.* He clears his throat and straightens his sweater. "Val, How's Mark?”
 
"Oh, we broke up." She isn't hesitant; she looks proud of it. Good for her. Nash notices that her food portion is small, but it's better than nothing. Ember made her go to therapy after her dinner outburst a couple of weeks ago, and she was able to open up about her eating disorder to the therapist. They also apologized to each other, and Ember took her out on a girl's day, which is something Sienna would do, so she probably suggested it to her.
 
Now she's focusing on going back to her normal food portions, just healthier. She looks a lot better, too; her hair is a lot thicker, her skin has its color again, and she doesn't look tired all the time. Not only that, but she's been going out like she used to with all of her friends again, and sometimes she wears confident clothes, but it's pretty rare. She still has scars from all of this, but she's doing better, and that's what matters. 
 
Grandma gasps, "Oh my! Why?" 
 
"He cheated on me." Val takes a bite of ham after. 
 
"Oh, I'm sorry, hun." 
 
She shrugs. "It's okay. His loss." 
 
Nash looks over to her, smiling, and she does the same back. It's a mutual understanding of what truly happened and the secrets kept from adults. The time she fought Penny or the time Sam fought Mark. God, if Ember and Sienna knew, they would've been 6 feet under by now.
 
Seconds later, they stop smiling because they both realize Ember and Sienna didn't know about the breakup. Ember is shaking in anger, and Sienna has her mouth open, about to take a bite of her ham, but stops. 
 
"He did what?" Ember grits through her teeth. "HE DID WHAT?" 
 
"Hun, calm down; it's okay; they are done." Sienna puts a hand on Ember's shoulder, making her calm down slightly.
 
Ember controls her breathing, biting her lip, before leaning back in her chair. "Nash, do you want to go driving again?"
 
"Why?"
 
"So we can run Mark over." 
Nash laughs, and Val's lips twitch up. 
 
 
After dinner, they say bye to Sienna's parents before going into the living room, taking all the blankets in their house, and throwing them on the couch. 
 
Every Christmas Eve, at night, the family gathers together and watches a Christmas movie. This Christmas Eve, they decided to go home alone—the first one, of course. This tradition started when Nash and Val were kids and was one of the things that just never fell apart. 
 
Ember and Sienna cuddle together, while Nash and Val make gagging noises toward them. A couple of seconds later, they calmed down. The movie was playing, the blankets were tight and warm around everyone, and the candle Sienna lit earlier smelled like coconuts. 
 
It's nice, after a full two months of chaos with the family, to sit down and just relax with them again. It is a sort of comfort that no one can get for free. 
 
Part of the time, Nash can stop, look around, and enjoy the people he has in his life. 

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