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❛ ᴏᴄᴇᴀɴ ᴇʏᴇꜱ. ❜ ° . ༄
- ͙۪۪˚ ▎❛ 𝐒𝐈𝐗 ❜ ▎˚ ͙۪۪̥◌
»»————- ꒰ ʙᴏʏs ɪɪ ᴍᴇɴsᴀ ꒱
❝ OUR MARRIAGE VOWS HAVE
BEEN RENEWED ONCE MORE! ❞
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"I have graded your book reports from last Friday," Mr. Feeny said.
In a not too uncommon occurrence, Juliet's attention was focused on her two goofy best friends— most notably on Cory, who was wearing a bright red clown nose and making funny faces. The girl couldn't help but let a few giggles escape which caught their teacher's attention. He made his way over to the boy's desk. "Ah, Mr. Matthews," he began sternly. "Shall I express my usual disappointment or just ask you to guide my sleigh tonight?"
"Uh, wrong holiday, Mr. Feeny," Cory corrected him as he removed his fake nose. "See, Halloween's coming up and I'm just test-driving my clown nose."
"Then I insist you stay in the driver's seat. Keep that nose on all morning." He turned to the redhead sitting diagonally behind the boy and handed back her assignment. "Miss Capelwood, good work as usual. Mr. Minkus, excellent work as well. I particularly enjoyed your haiku on Captain Ahab's obsession with the white whale."
"The calm blue ocean. Sun lights up the monster's eye. He sees me. Whale food," Minkus recited.
"It works on so many levels."
The boy turned to the redhead behind him. "I was thinking of your ocean eyes, Juliet." He smiled. "I wouldn't mind being whale food for you."
Shawn snorted. "I don't think calling her a whale will help your case, brown-noser."
Minkus' eyes widened slightly at the realization before he shot back "troglodyte," and turned around, abashed.
"Mr. Lewis, very good work. Mr. Matthews, not one of your better efforts. Mr. Hunter," Mr. Feeny continued to hand back the papers.
"Hey, that isn't fair!" Cory protested. "Rick and I both got Cs. How come you tell him he did good work but you tell me it wasn't one of my better efforts?"
Juliet sighed and slumped slightly, rolling her eyes as Cory approached their teacher. As much as he was her best friend, his dramatics sometimes tired her.
🌎🌎🌎
Juliet and Shawn were waiting outside of Mr. Feeny's classroom as the boy had just finished detention (and listening to the redhead nag him for it) while the girl had nothing else to do with her two friends preoccupied. Juliet was just separating the tops of her Oreo snack for Shawn when Cory finally came out of the classroom.
"You waited for me?" he asked with surprise.
"Are we not your best friends?" the dark-haired boy responded.
"You had detention, didn't you?"
"Oh yeah, Ms. Engles nailed me."
"In art!" Juliet exclaimed, exasperated.
Shawn chucked his empty juice container towards the trash only to miss. "That's what makes me one of the greats," he said with a cheeky smile.
The redhead sighed and handed him all but one top of her cookies. Without access to a knife, she invented her own method of separating the icing by breaking one of the cookies in half and scraping the flat edge across the white icing. It worked well enough.
"You didn't get detention, Jules."
She shrugged. "I am your best friend."
Cory grinned. "I'm not gonna argue that but it's 'cause Shawn and I were busy, right?"
"What else?" she asked as handed the dark-haired boy her remaining cookie halves for him to eat.
As Shawn bent to pick up his dropped container and throw it away properly, something caught his eye and he picked up a crumpled paper. "Hey, check this out! Answers to a test."
"Shawn," Juliet started reproachfully. "We can't be looking at test answers!"
The boy gently patted the top of her head. "Shush, Julie."
"Yeah, that's major cheating," Cory agreed with the redhead. "We'd get detention for life!"
He sighed. "No, these aren't for the real test. They're for that stupid IQ exam we're taking tomorrow." Shawn crumpled the paper back up and tossed it as he used his other hand to finish his half of the cookies.
Juliet relaxed as the danger passed and put the icing in her mouth, smiling slightly at the sweet taste. He gave her a grin. "Our marriage vows have been renewed once more!"
She rolled her eyes. "Cookie partner vows, if anything."
"Same thing!"
"Can we please focus?" Cory asked irritably. He'd picked the papers back up. "The person who knows these answer can get a perfect score."
"On a test that doesn't count for a grade. Why bother?"
"Are you kidding?" he asked. "This will get Feeny off my back! If Feeny thinks I'm a genius, he'll treat me just as he treats Minkus."
"Hey, Cory, do yourself a favor. Crumple the paper up and throw it away in the trash. Don't complicate your life." Juliet was surprised that this was Shawn who was saying this, not her. Maybe she was finally rubbing off on him.
"You already know it's gonna backfire on you so why even try?" she asked in agreement.
"You know, that makes a lot of sense and if I were a smarter person, I'd probably listen— except I'm not a smarter person. But tomorrow, I'm gonna be a genius." He folded the paper up and put it in his pocket.
Juliet sighed as they walked out of school together, whispering quietly to Shawn. "Ready for this one?"
He gave her a faintly amused look. "Are we ever?"
🌎🌎🌎
"I hold in my hands the result of Tuesday's IQ test and one person here deserves special attention. This person achieved not only the highest score in the whole class, not only the highest score in the whole school, but a score so high it gives rise to the question: 'is there, in fact, a limit to the ceiling of human intelligence?'"
"Please, Mr. Feeny! You're embarrassing me," Minkus protested.
Juliet felt slightly bad for him. While it was a little annoying when he boasted about his brilliance, it was hard-earned and not cheated.
"Mr. Minkus, you came in second," Mr. Feeny said flatly.
"Second?" the boy echoed.
"Uh-huh."
"As in, not first? Someone scored higher than me on an IQ test?" he asked in disbelief.
"Blew you out of the academic waters. Someone sitting in this very classroom is a junior Kierkegaard." Their teacher stopped in front of Cory's desk.
"A what?"
"A great mind, Mr. Matthews, just like yours. I clearly have underrated you and boy to your genius," he said, starting to clap for his achievement. "Bravo."
"It's not a big thing, Mr. Feeny," Cory said.
"On the contrary, Mr. Matthews. It is a very big thing."
The boy turned to look at his two friends with wide eyes. "Uh-oh."
Backfire, Juliet thought.
🌎🌎🌎
After school the three of them entered Cory's house at almost lighting speed, dashing past the three members of the Matthews family that appeared in the door.
"Can't talk mom— lotta homework— gotta go," Cory said in a rush as they blew past her.
Juliet tried for an apologetic look but Shawn had grabbed her wrist to continue to propel her along, forcing her past the Matthews.
"Feeny knows," Cory burst out once they got to his room. "Somehow he knows and he's gonna get to me."
"I'm not gonna say it," Juliet promised, "but I really want to."
"You're wrong," Shawn countered.
"You think he's sending my parents a thank you letter?" Cory asked. "'Thank you for bringing up your son. He's a genius. He's smarter than Captain Kierkegaard!'"
Shawn leapt up from Cory's bed, took the envelope from him and began to open it.
"What are you doing? That's a sealed envelope addressed to my parents! They're gonna know I opened it!"
"Cory, do your parents write letters to anyone?"
"Yeah?" the boy said, confused.
"And what do they put them in?"
"Envelopes."
"Just like this one, so we could seal it up in a new white envelope," Shawn pointed out.
"Yeah, but what about the 'addressed to his parents' part? We can't copy Feeny's handwriting!"
"We can just cut out that part and paste it on the new one."
"But—"
"Shush, Julie. It'll work."
"I love how we think!" Cory declared, looking a lot more confident.
As Shawn opened the letter the rest of the way, Juliet nudged his arm and the boy instinctively raised it to wrap around her shoulders so she could curl up against his side in a better position to read the paper. She tucked her feet up on the edge of Cory's bed and brought her knees to her chest before she wrapped her arms around them comfortably.
"What's it say?" Cory asked, worried again.
"Uh-oh, they're bringing in the S.E.A.."
Juliet rolled her eyes but didn't correct him, not minding poking fun at their friend.
"What?"
"The State Education Authority. They have special field agents who handle intelligence fraud."
Knowing how overdramatic he was going to be, Juliet buried her face against her friend's side to hide her laughter as she didn't want to give away the joke too soon. He really did deserve it, she figured. She had warned him, after all.
Predictably, Cory freaked out: "oh no, oh no! I'm cooked! For the first time in my life, I'm in real trouble!"
A few stray giggles escaped her and she tried to contain them, causing Shawn to look down and give her a soft, amused smile before he looked back up at Cory. "Not if I'm making this all up!"
"Are you?"
"No," he said seriously.
"I'm cooked!"
Juliet laughed for real now, unable to contain the sound as her arms wrapped around her sides. "Of course he is, Cor. Relax. Feeny just wants to talk to your parents."
He glared at her. "I don't know what you find so funny."
"Your reaction!"
"What if he tells them he doesn't think I'm a genius?" Cory asked as he took the letter to read it for himself.
"Who cares if Feeny doesn't think you're brilliant? As long as the test says so, you're a genius."
"But I'm not and my parents know I'm not."
"Then you'll have to make them think you are."
"How do I do that?" Cory asked.
"Cory, it's Halloween; and this year, you're going as a genius," Shawn said.
🌎🌎🌎
"Shawn, Jules, this whole thing is getting out of hand." Cory was still freaking out the next day.
"Relax," Shawn said. "Everyone thinks you're brilliant. You should enjoy it."
"When it was just Mr. Feeny I could enjoy it but now my parents are involved and I don't like lying to them."
"You don't?" Shawn and Juliet spoke at the same time. They looked at each other and grinned.
"Nope."
"Huh," the boy said thoughtfully before he turned to the redhead. "Does it—"
"—give me a little rush?" she finished with a knowing smile. "Yep."
"That's my girl," he said proudly. He wrapped an arm around her shoulders to pull her closer to his seat on the table. Juliet rolled her eyes for the umpteenth time but didn't fight it, feeling comfortable as she leaned against his side.
"Besides," Juliet continued, "you didn't tell them you were a genius, Feeny did—"
"And I didn't tell Feeny I was a genius—" Cory realized.
"—the test results did," Shawn added, "and you didn't ask to take the test—"
"They gave it to me."
"—and I wouldn't have even seen the answers—"
"—if they hadn't given us detention," Shawn finished.
"We're innocent victims here!" Cory exclaimed.
"Nothing we did was actually our fault."
"It's good to be kids," Cory decided.
Minkus came up to them then. "I don't get it," he said bluntly before he turned to the redhead with a smile. "Hi, Juliet."
She nodded to him. "Minkus."
"What?" Cory asked.
"If you're smarter than me why are you always trying to copy from my paper?"
"'Cause he can't see mine," Juliet said helpfully, hoping the questions would stop.
"No offense my Juliet, but everyone knows I'm the smartest in the class, not you. He copies off my paper for a reason."
"She isn't yours," Shawn snapped before he stood up and used his considerable height to intimidate the boy. "He's not copying, anyway. He's just glancing over to admire the work of a fellow genius."
The redhead sighed as she realized that Shawn was now standing between her and Minkus to block the boy's view of her. She really, really didn't get his overprotectiveness.
"You are?" Minkus asked.
"He is."
"I am."
"Oh, well, that's okay. In fact, from now on, I can kind of tip my test papers up so you can admire them more easily."
"Would you do that?" Cory asked, surprised.
"No," Minkus replied in such a way that made Juliet's mouth quirk up slightly.
As he walked back to his desk, Shawn glared at him. "Genius envy."
"That's not the only envy going on here," the redhead said. "Seriously Shawnie, tone it down."
He turned to her. "You're not his."
She lifted her chin slightly. "I'm not," she agreed, "but I'm not yours either. I'm your best friend, that's it."
Before he could respond, Mr. Feeny appeared with another teacher. "Class, this is Ms. Chin. She'll be with you for the first half hour while I talk to Mr. Matthews."
Cory turned to them as he left. "Tell my mom I went out like a man."
🌎🌎🌎
They didn't get a chance to talk to Cory until after school when he called them to come over for a 'big emergency.'
As they entered the Matthews' house, Juliet glanced at Shawn. "What d'you think it is?"
He shrugged. "What do you think? Probably Feeny."
She nodded in agreement and matched his pace as they ran up the stares to burst into Cory's room. "Alright, what's the big emergency?" Shawn asked.
Immediately, Cory stood up and began to shoot his Nerf gun at them. Shawn yelped slightly and blindly reach for the redhead's hand to yank her behind him. For once, she was grateful for his overprotectiveness.
"Hey! What are you trying to do, kill us?"
Cory ran out of ammo and they recovered, Shawn turning to the girl and looked at her wide, blue eyes with concern. "You okay?"
She nodded. "Thanks, Cor," she said sarcastically.
He winced. "Sorry, Jules."
"Apology accepted."
Cory turned to Shawn. "Kill you? I'll tell you about being killed! How about what you did to me?"
"What'd I do?"
"Where are you spending your next recess? Playground, shooting hoops, playing ball?"
"Yeah, so?"
"So, let me tell you what I'm doing: I'm searching for Bobby Fisher!" Cory exclaimed.
"What are you talking about?" Juliet demanded.
"Did you know that geniuses go to a special school?" He flopped down on his bed. "You killed me. I'm gonna be in a class filled with Minkuses. Wait a minute, what am I talking about? These kids make Minkus look like Fabio. The lady is gonna be here in a half an hour and they're gonna give me another genius test and then they're gonna take me away, so I called you and Juliet to say goodbye, or as geniuses say, goodbye in Latin."
Oh. "Cory," the redhead said sternly.
"Yeah?"
"Are you a genius?"
"No," he suddenly sounded confused.
"Do you have the answers to this test?"
"No."
"Do you see where I'm going with this?" Why was she friends with such idiots?
"You want me to throw the test?"
"Oh no," Shawn said. "We want you to take the test to the best of your ability. And no guessing— we wouldn't want you to stumble into a right answer."
As he grabbed Juliet's wrist and tugged her to the door, the redhead paused right before leaving to say: "vale."
🌎🌎🌎
Juliet went dressed as Juliet Capulet which was a common occurrence on Halloween. Her mom had even taken off work early to help put the girl's hair up into the medieval updo and take pictures of her despite the fact that the redhead had protested that she was almost always Juliet.
"Nonsense, darling," Daly said with her camera in hand. "You might be the same character every year but you're not the same person. I like to look at how much you've changed." She smiled at her daughter. "Every equation needs a constant, you know."
The girl smiled back happily, her protests ceasing as she struck a myriad of different poses for her mother while waiting for Shawn to come by. Finally, there was a knock on their door.
"I'll get it!" she called in excitement. She rushed to the door and threw it open, her face morphing into one of (fake) confusion. "This isn't Dr. Frankenstein's house, I'm afraid you've got the wrong number."
"I'm not Frankenstein, I'm Shawn!" The boy pulled off the mask to reveal his familiar face.
"Oh!" Juliet laughed. "Then of course you can come in!" She seized his wrist and pulled him inside. "Your costume was so good I didn't notice!"
"It seems like I made the wrong choice," he commented as they entered the living room. "I should've gone as Romeo."
The redhead turned to him with a firm look. "What have I said about—"
He waved her off. "Yeah, yeah. You could stand it for one night, I think. Hello Miss Capelwood," he added to her mother.
Daly smiled at her daughter's best friend. "It's good to see you, Shawn. You're growing into a handsome young boy, I see," she said, sending a wink to the girl.
Juliet's face turned bright red while Shawn laughed. "Mom!"
"I'm trying to convince her, Miss Capelwood. She's very stubborn."
"She just doesn't know a good thing when she sees it," the older woman said in mock disappointment. "Enough of that now. I'm sure you want to get trick-or-treating and I'm not going to let you leave without a few pictures first!" She waved the camera around, prompting the two to get picture-ready.
[edited apr. 2022]