Hello my lovelies,
So.....
I'M BACK!
(PLEASE READ THE REST OF THE NOTE)
Yes, yes, I know, hold your applause - LOL- Majority of exams are over, well the important ones at least, fans would have got my message about how they went, but... anywhooooo...
HERE'S THE NEXT CHAPTER!
Amelia, Blake and the rest of the gang have returned from their little holiday to the back of my brain and they are here for you guys! :D
I really hope this is okay, obviously, I haven't had much time to concentrate on it and I wanted to get a chapter out this week, so....
Anyway, enjoy reading and thanks for your support and understanding!
- Bex. X
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2 weeks. 2 whole weeks.
“Come on Mi, you need to eat something, you’re wasting away!” Kaitlin persuaded
“He used to call me that...” Amelia sniffled, “Mi.”
Kaitlin shook her head, “James made you some grilled chicken, hey you’ve even got strawberries for dessert! Your favourite.”
Amelia burst into tears, “My favourite,” she got out between sobs, “Grilled chicken and strawberries for dessert!”
“Oh Mia, I’m sorry. Come on now, you can get over this...”
“No Kait. I loved him and I pushed him away because of something that happened almost 9 years ago. I’m so stupid!”
“Mia, are you still in love with him?” Kaitlin questioned.
Amelia nodded furiously.
Kaitlin let out a deep sigh, “James told me not to do this.”
“Do what?” she choked
Kaitlin departed the room and came back with a single blood red rose and an envelope.
“They’re from Blake.”
Amelia inhaled the fresh scent of the rose before opening the card reading it, once, twice, three times, four.
Hey Blondie,
If you haven’t guessed by now, it’s me, Blake.
James won’t let me come to see you and I needed to talk, so I’ve written this, even though I’m sure it won’t get further than the shredder! Better to let out my feelings though. A beautiful woman in a khaki jacket once showed me that...
I wanted to apologise for the whole thing with the scar, I overstepped the mark and I’m sorry.
These past 5 months have been the best of my life, and even though you may want to forget them, I won’t. Not ever.
I love you Amelia.
All my love, always and forever.
Your,
Blakey. X
The tears slid down her face slowly. She rolled over in bed.
“Kait, can I have a moment?” she whispered hoarsely.
“Sure thing honey, just call if you need me.” Kaitlin got up, shutting the door behind her.
Amelia read the letter again. Why did he keep apologising? It wasn’t his fault, it was hers!
He’d even signed Blondie on the envelope.
She picked up the envelope and something fluttered out to land on the snow white sheets.
She turned it over.
It was a picture of them at the pool, Blake’s arms wrapped around her front. Amelia was smiling at him, just about to kiss him.
Attached with a paperclip was another photograph. A Polaroid. It was a picture of them by the oak tree on the day that she moved to Birmingham.
As it was taken by Blake, his outstretched arm was visible in the corner of the photo. They both had their tongues sticking out, Amelia’s head resting in the crook of his arm. A small piece of paper was stuck to the back which she ripped off and unfolded.
Jump and I’ll jump with you. B. X
Blake. Blake. Blake.
“Remember when you were 8? The day before you left and I took you to that river and we pretended we were standing on the Grand Canyon? I told you that I wouldn’t jump with you, I’d be there at the bottom to catch you and we fell asleep underneath the oak tree?”
Amelia trailed her fingers over the photo and kissed it softly.
Why did her past with Nicholas have to affect her future with Blake?
But it didn’t!
She rolled up out of bed and slipped on a crème blouse and black pencil skirt. Taming her hair into submission she added foundation, blushed and mascara before grabbing her bag and the rose and heading downstairs.
“Mia?”
James and Kaitlin pulled out of their kiss.
“Can’t talk now, going to work.” She dismissed
She got into her car and sped quickly to the office.
She sat in the car for a few moments, twiddling the stem of the rose in between her fingers. She took one final deep breath, summoning all of her confidence before stepping out of the car.
She had to tell him everything, everything about Nicholas, everything about her past. She had to save this relationship.
As she stepped through the main entrance and looked upwards she wished that her eyes were lying. It felt like a sharp knife had pierced her heart.
If someone else had told her, she wouldn’t have believed it.
A tall blonde woman was draped all over Blake in a dangerously low cut dress. She was whispering in his ear and he was laughing. She couldn’t move, she couldn’t think, she couldn’t breathe.
He’d moved on. He’d forgotten all about her.
Suddenly his eyes flickered to hers, as if he sensed her presence, filled with shock and horror.
“Amelia?”
The rose dropped from her hands and she choked.
Why?
How?
Why would he do this?
She turned on her heel slowly and walked out the same way she came.
“Amelia, Mia, wait!” his hand gripped her arm
“Back the hell off Blake!” she screamed
He pressed the rose into her hand looking at her with frantic eyes, “Amelia it wasn’t anything! It was nothing, I swear it was nothing!”
“Sure, ‘cause it sure as hell didn’t look like anything to me Blake, did it?! Have your wh*re Blake, have her, but you won’t be having me anymore. By hell am I catching something from her. Go to hell Blake!” Amelia retorted, throwing the rose back.
“No Blondie! There’s no one else, there’s no one else but you. Did you get my letter? You got the rose. Mia, it’s only you.”
“You’re not fooling me with your bullsh*t excuses Blake. I know what you were like, before me, now. If you need me work wise contact me via my secretary, Kat Carter. I don’t want you anywhere near me.” She snatched back the rose, storming off.
“Mia, please just listen to me...” he pleaded
“I don’t want to hear it. Goodbye.” She got into the car and slammed the door.
He pounded on the window, shouting at her as she reversed and pulled out of the car park.
DAMN!
He cursed under his breath. She’d just walked out again!
The only woman he’d ever loved and she’d driven out of his life for the second time in 21 years!
Wait.
She’d taken the rose? Oh, thank God! That meant that she still loved him, didn’t it? She must still feel something, mustn’t she?
“Blake...” a voice purred
Great, this was all he needed!
Marissa Granger was an ex-playboy model turned business executive. She’d recently gone through a “traumatic” divorce with the man himself, Hugh Hefner and had been given millions in a recent law suit, not to mention magazine, newspaper and book deals begging her to tell her story.
Sure, she was hot. Full rack, curvy hips, symmetrical face. But nothing compared to the girl that he’d fallen in love with when he was eight years old.
He’d have to get rid of Marissa as soon as possible.
“Sorry Marissa, I have somewhere to be...”
“What, too important for me?” she purred
He rolled his eyes in irritation. Admittedly, Marissa was a good looking woman but Amelia had spoilt him for other women. Hell, he’d tried with her, but all he could think about was how disappointed she’d be, just like then. His body refused to respond anyway.
“Yes, I’m busy.” He growled, walking away from her.
He stormed to his sports car and jumped in, driving to the Crawford mansion like the speed of light.
Hopping out, he banged roughly on the door.
It swung open and Kaitlin met him with a weak smile, “Hi Blake.”
“Hi Kaitlin, I need to see Amelia, please.”
“I don’t think that’s the best idea Blake. She’s an absolute mess, she’s in pieces. I thought that she was better, after she read your letter, but she came back and she was worse than before.”
Blake ran a hand through his hair and winced, “Where is she?”
“In the garden, underneath the bandstand but she won’t talk to anyone. If James or Amelia asks, you barged right past me when I tried to stop you, understand? I’ll make myself scarce.”
“Kaitlin, you’re a gem.” He kissed her cheek, walking past her and out into the garden.
He spotted her lying on a deck chair underneath the bandstand. He rushed over to her, trying not to be heard.
Her face was a ghastly white and she wore some black sunglasses to cover her tear-stained face, the glasses that he’d given her on the night of their first kiss.
Her luscious scent attacked his senses, the hint of chocolate, vanilla and strawberries, making him inhale deeply.
“Leave me alone Blake.”
His eyes swung to hers. He eyes weren’t even open and yet she knew he was here? He hadn’t even made a sound.
“Mia, I’m sorry.” He muttered
“For what? That scar or the beautiful leggy blonde that was decorating your arm so well earlier?” she hissed callously.
“I told you that it didn’t mean anything! I don’t know what I was thinking! I was trying to make you jealous or something, I swear it didn’t mean anything.”
“She good in bed?” Amelia sneered
“WHAT?!” Blake exploded, “I haven’t! We haven’t! Amelia, I could never, ever... there’s no one else but you and truth be told, I’ll probably never sleep with anyone but you ever again.”
Amelia swallowed, looking away, “You don’t mean that.”
Blake reached out, twirling a lose strand of her hair around his finger before tucking it behind her ear.
He took off her sunglasses and studied her face.
She was so incredibly beautiful. Her deep blue eyes were dilated and bloodshot from crying, her lip was trembling.
He brushed his lips against her cheek, before kissing her lips ever so softly.
“I love you Blondie.”
“I love you too Blake.” She sobbed
He kissed her eyelids, “I’m sorry.”
“Blake I can’t...” she wiped her tears fiercely.
“What?” he questioned, “What baby?”
“I can’t love you anymore. I can't be hurt again." she choked out.
“No! No Amelia. I can just about live with us... not being together anymore. You say that you don’t love me and... it’ll kill me Mia, I know it will.”
“I’m sorry,” she kissed his forehead, “For being mean and callous. You didn’t deserve that.”
“I love you.” He buried his head in her neck, nipping gently with his teeth.
“Blake, please, we can’t.” She complained
“Sorry,” he pulled away, “Just friends then. If that's what you want."
“Sure,” she smiled weakly, “Just friends.”
He extended his hand and she shook it.
“Friends...” he mumbled, “Damn it, this is hard!”
“I know...”
“Can I kiss you?” he asked, “Just once? To remember?”
“I don’t know Blake...” she hesitated
“Please...” he grasped her hands.
She nodded briefly.
He cupped her face in his hands and kissed her. She tried not to respond but she’d almost forgotten all the emotions that his touch, his kiss had evoked in her. She threaded her hand through his hair and his tongue swept across her lip, trying desperately to deepen the kiss, to make her fall in love with him all over again, to try. Just to try...
She pulled away and put her forehead to his.
“Thank you.” He kissed her nose, “I love you.”
She sighed, “I love you too.”
He drew away, “I better be going then.”
“No, stay. I’ll make you some lunch? Grilled chicken sound okay?”
“That would be great.” Blake smiled
“You want anything with it?” she asked
“Whatever you have.” He replied
She got up and they walked to the house.
He grabbed her waist and threw her over his shoulder, making her laugh.
“Blake! Blake, seriously, put me down!” she giggled
He chuckled and lowered her to the ground. He loved to hear her giggle. She ran inside before he could grab her and he followed her like a lost puppy.
When he caught up, she was already leant over, rummaging through the freezer.
His eyes were glued firmly on her. In times like these in the near past, he would have grabbed her waist, squeezing her gently, before capturing her lips in a passionate kiss and carrying her up to bed.
His hands itched to touch her and he drummed his fingers against the kitchen work top.
“Problem?” she asked, snapping her head upwards.
Her hair had the messy look that appeared that she had just been making wild, passionate love, a look that he knew all too well.
“No.” He replied, suppressing his desire.
She laid the strawberries on the counter, “Whipped cream?”
Strawberries and cream.
Like he used to feed her when they were tucked up in bed. He remembered how she used to nibble his fingers teasingly.
“Yeah, sure, why not?” he swallowed the lump in his throat.
She turned and retrieved the cream and bowls, preparing the sweet dish.
“Don’t you think we should have the chicken before?” he asked
She looked upwards, “You like dessert before dinner, you always have.”
Blake chuckled, remembering the first day that they met.
An eight year old version of himself had just finished scoffing down his sister’s Easter egg that he had stolen from her room. Chocolate. Hmmm....
He was playing on his games console, when his mother called him downstairs.
He remembered laying eyes on her for the first time, a cute little curly-haired girl in a white summer dress and brown sandals. Her brother complained about wanting to go home and eat chocolate.
“Oh Blake, look at the state of you!” his mother licked her thumb and wiped chocolate from his mouth, “You were meant to wait until after dinner!”
“MUM!” he whined, pulling away.
“Hi, I’m Blake, what’s your name?”
“I’m James!” the boy proudly stated
“Mia...” the girl lisped, looking down shyly
Cute by name, cute by nature.
He felt a warm fuzzy feeling spread through him, staring at her. How weird...
“Would you like to come and play with us Blake? Mum’s made us an Easter egg hunt. Do you like chocolate?” James resembled the Duracell bunny, hopping from his left foot to his right, seemingly impatient.
“Sure!” Blake smiled, “Do you like chocolate Mia?”
Mia looked up and beamed, “I like chocolate lots and lots and I’m going to win!”
Her smile was like a warm summer’s day, no, forget that, like ice cream or chocolate, or even better Mum’s homemade pink lemonade...even better than that.
“No, you’re not, I am!” James stuck his tongue out.
“Go away snot face, Blake’s my friend, not yours!” she copied her brother’s actions
“How about we all be friends?” Blake suggested
“Okay, we’ll all be friends. Best friends right?” James nodded
“Forever?” Mia asked
“Sure,” the boys agreed, “Best friends forever.”
“You wore a white dress with little cherries on it and some brown sandals.” Blake murmured, blinking away the memory.
“Pardon?”
“On the day that we met. You wore a white summer dress and brown sandals.”
Her eyes lit up, “Chocolate all around your mouth. Black cargo shorts, green t-shirt. Matches your eyes.”
They stared at each other silently.
“Umm... here’s your strawberries.” She handed him a bowl.
“You said that you’d win.” He laughed, devouring a cream covered strawberry.
“Well, what can I say? I’m just amazing at finding things.” She smirked, biting into a strawberry.
Did she know how sexy she looked with moisture on her lips?
“It is truly an honour to be in your presence Queen Easter for two years running.” Blake gave a little bow.
She laughed, “I only won because you helped me to cheat.”
“Don’t tell James, he’ll kill me!” he whined
“You looking forward to California?” Amelia asked
“Sure, it’ll be great to go back, don’t you think?”
“Yeah, I haven’t been back in three years, it’ll be good to get some sun in my bones. Get a tan for my pale skin.”
“You look perfect, just the way you are.” Blake replied.
Amelia smiled, sitting on his lap, moving the hair from his eyes, “You, Blake Goldstein are the sweetest man I’ve ever met.”
His eyes flickered upwards, holding her gaze and she was surprised that she didn’t melt into a puddle on the floor.
Their necks extended and their lips met.
The kiss was soft, gentle, experimental, but as soon as she wrapped her legs around his waist it turned wild. She gripped his hair tightly as his hands fisted at the small of her back, pulling her to his chest. His tongue slipped inside, massaging hers, kissing her fiercely as if she would evaporate before his very eyes. She moaned, slipping her hands under his shirt.
He panted, “M-M-Mia, you don’t want this.” He pulled away reluctantly.
She groaned, covering her face with her hands, “I’m sorry! It’s just...”
“Mia,” he sighed, “I’m afraid, afraid that if we do this, I won’t be able to stop, won’t be able to let you go, and then I’ll feel like crap when you wake up in the morning and regret it.”
“I know,” she said, “That was my fault, I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise!” Blake replied, “No more sorry.”
“I need to tell you what happened. It’s the reason why...the reason I can't do another relationship... I need to get it off my chest, so you understand, so I can move on.” Amelia whispered
“Go on.” Blake replied.
Amelia took a deep breath.
“It was eight years ago... I’d been seeing him for a year and a half. You have to understand, I was completely and utterly head over heels for him, I’d do anything for him, and when I say anything, I mean absolutely anything. That’s why. He started three months into the relationship. I thought it was just his temper, thought I was doing something wrong, then it got worse. I tried to escape, I really did, but he said... if he could do all this to me, what about my family? I was afraid they weren't safe. So I never said anything.
"Then, out of the blue, just before I started university, he said he wanted to marry me. I said yes, I was so afraid, afraid of what he’d do to me. But finally as we were standing outside the tiny little registry office, I said no - I couldn't do it, couldn't chain myself to him for life. He rewarded me with a broken wrist, broken leg, fractured skull, a few cracked ribs and the scar...”
“He...” she gulped, “He bundled me into the car despite my screams, took me home, pinned me down, grabbed a knife and just cut, deep into my back. They think he may have been trying to carve his name but panicked and ran away. There was so much blood. Doctors said I was lucky he didn’t hit my spine. If James hadn’t found me in time, I... I wouldn’t be here today.”
Blake winced.
“Look at me,” Amelia laughed humourlessly, wiping her tears, “Here I am, spilling out my shitty past to you. I’m sorry.”
“What did I tell you about saying sorry Amelia? You have nothing to apologise for, absolutely nothing! It’s all him Mi! I’m tired of you feeling this way about yourself all the time!”
“Please don’t look at me like that.” Amelia pleaded
“Like what?”
She hung her head, “Like you’re disappointed, ashamed.”
“I am.”
“Oh...” she mumbled
“I’m ashamed I couldn’t stop him from hurting you, I’m disappointed that I didn’t find you before he could. I’m ashamed and disappointed in myself Mia. I should have found you a long time ago...”
“What?” she gasped, “Blake, no! This wasn’t any of your fault, none of it was!”
“Okay then, it was neither of our faults.” He ate his last strawberry
“Fine.” She nodded
He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and she snuggled against his fingers that lingered on her cheek.
He swallowed, “I better go.”
She kissed his fingertips, “Okay,” she turned away
“See you tomorrow Mia, baby. I love you.”
She listened as his footsteps paced away and the front door closed.
She pressed her fingers to her lips and sighed deeply.
“I love you too Blake Goldstein. Always.”
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[Author's Note]
It's sad, so sad, it's a sad sad situation....
Waaaaa!
Break-ups are hard, especially Blamelia, writing Rimberley in No Strings Attached and All's Fair in Love and Law was hard enough! Now this!
I just make these situations for myself, don't I? :(
Did you like the flashback? I may do more throughout the book, I like exploring their history!
Hope you enjoyed! :)
Love,
- Bex. x