"You said she was ugly."
"I did not say that, I said she was qualified."
"That's no different."
"Agree to disagree."
"So you're saying she's pretty?"
Help.
It was the middle of July, Ashley and I were getting married in three days from now, and we just got home from running a few errands and swing by my bar. And I might be mistaken, but I felt like we were about to get into an argument, a pointless one at that. But I'd be guessing.
"God, have mercy on me.", I groaned as I closed the door behind me. "As I said, she isn't ugly nor pretty, she's just qualified."
"So.. average?"
"Ash!", I pouted, not missing the cocked eyebrow coming my way as we made our way upstairs. "Why are you making such a big fuss about this? It's not like I hired that girl, okay? But since Miguel is coming to our wedding, I couldn't possibly leave Max to handle the bar on his own, I'm sure you can understand that, right? I brought her in for the next four days, she'll be out of there by the time we come back."
"She better be.", she mumbled as she shuffled through our closet, causing me to stifle a laugh. "Don't mock me, García. I'm still confused as to why you didn't hire that other guy."
"Are you serious? That guy didn't even know how to open the cash register.", I chuckled as I approached her from behind, snaking my arms around her waist and pulling her closer. "Besides, are we missing the point for which I won't be working with that chick in the slightest since I'll be two hours away to get married to you?"
All I got in response was a weird mimic of my own voice repeating my statement.
"You're adorable when you're jealous, you know that?", I smirked, planting a gentle bite on her neck.
"I'm gonna ignore you.", she huffed, turning around to plant a kiss to my lips nonetheless. "I'm gonna hop in the shower, wanna join me in utter silence?"
I was about to agree on the spot when my phone buzzed, Jess' name flashing on my screen which caused me to release an exasperated sigh whereas Ashley giggled in amusement.
Rolling my eyes at her, I slapped her ass on her way to the bathroom before plunging on the bed and taking the call.
Staying true to her words, Jess was kicking ass at planning our motherfucking wedding. Thing is, Ashley and I decided to get married at her parents' mansion and all in all to keep things simple, but my best friend wasn't having any of it and as a matter of fact, she's been all over the place for the past few months.
It wasn't that I didn't appreciate all she was doing, mind me, but we had to stop her several times from going overboard.
"It's too hot to think, Jess!", I whined into the phone, my best friend giggling as a result.
"Work with me, bitch.", she then hissed as I heard her shuffle around.
"It's too hot for that too."
"May I remind you that you're getting fucking married in three days and we have nothing, you fucktard?!"
"Are you kidding me?", I chuckled, shaking my head at her hostility. "The only thing that's left to decide are the flowers and-"
"And your fucking dress, you idiot.", she cut me off, a shy smile creeping up on me. "So? Dress or suit?! Unless you're considering getting married naked, that is."
"I haven't decided yet..", I mumbled as I stretched further onto the bed, my eyes absentmindedly landing on the rock sitting on my finger. "I hate dresses."
The ring Ashley gave me was ridiculously big. I didn't even wanna begin to think how much she spent on it and I gave up altogether when she basically murdered me with her eyes when I was about to complain. Like, seriously, I couldn't walk into a room without someone noticing it like right fucking away. It's not that I didn't like it cause come on.. but believe me when I tell you that her sharpie wannabe ring was more than enough for me, hence why I actually got it tattooed a couple of days after her proposal.
"Then suit it is.", she concluded. "I actually saw one the other day, I'm gonna grab Sky and go take a look."
"Without me?"
"Yeah, without you. You have no sense in fashion to begin with, so it's needless to say I definitely know better than you do."
I rolled my eyes at her, my brain trying to come up with a snarky remark but I had nothing. Hearing the sound of footsteps coming into the room, I smiled as I looked up to greet amused grey eyes, her body wrapped into a towel as she made her way further into the room.
"True.", I breathed out, absentmindedly biting my lip as Ashley's seductive smirk didn't go unnoticed as she lingered at the bottom of the bed. "But you need me there, or at least my body, Jess.. and I have work in an hour."
"Well, Sky and I will go there and look at a few options, then you can come try it on tomorrow, how does-"
But her words fell on deaf ears as a towel landed on my face, Ashley's hungry eyes taking me in as a smirk made its way to my lips.
"Hello there." I whistled as she started crawling on our bed. "Jess, that sounds perfect! I'll call you later-"
"Wh- again?!", she hissed down the line. "I give up, I'm done. This is unbelie-"
Ending the call and literally throwing my phone somewhere in the room, I grabbed a handful of her ass as she straddled me, pulling her closer and bringing our lips together.
It was no secret that Ashley and I have been all over each other since we first met, but ever since she came back into my life, and ever since she proposed and we started using the toy every now and then, it was safe to say that we were making love every goddamn chance we got.
"I thought you were ignoring me, Miss Stevens?", I husked as I flipped her around, an amused squeal coming my way.
"I figured you could use an escape from Jess.", she smirked as she shyly bit her lip.
"Oh, did you now?", I teased as I brought my lips to her neck. "How noble of you to come to my rescue."
"Anytime."
It wasn't long before my shirt was taken off, our lips and tongues engaging into the umpteenth hungry kiss as our hands started roaming each other's bodies. But just as I was about to take my jeans off, I heard car doors slamming outside followed by an all too familiar voice which caused me to stiffen altogether and my eyes to go wide in panic.
"What day is it?"
"The 20th, why? What-"
"Oh, shit.", I hissed, getting off of her in a split second as I looked for my shirt. "Shit, shit, shit, fuck, shit."
"Alex, what is going on?", she chuckled as she lifted herself on the bed and studied me in amusement.
That's when she heard it too.
"Is that..?", she trailed off, the color draining from her face as she took in my apologetic smile.
"Yup, that's Grandma.", I deadpanned as I tossed her the first clothes I encountered around the room.
She's so gonna kill me.
"WHAT?!", she squealed, jumping out of the bed and frantically getting dressed. "She wasn't supposed to be here before tomorrow?!"
"I- err.. well-", I stuttered, even more so cause she was now glaring at me like never before. "She called a couple of weeks ago to say she'd be a day early and-"
"And you forgot to tell me?!", she half-shouted as she goofily slipped on her sweatpants. "Are you insane?!"
"Well, I'm marrying you, so-"
"Alex!"
"Look, I'm sorry, okay?!", I chuckled, unfazed by the unimpressed look coming my way. "With all the wedding planning and everything else, it honestly slipped my mind baby, I'm sorry."
"I'm too busy freaking out right now to be even remotely mad at you.", she huffed as she started pacing back and forth.
"Hey, calm down, okay?", I soothed, pulling her into a tight hug. "Everything's gonna be fine, I promise."
"Yeah? How do you know?"
I didn't. But one could hope, right?
"Listen..", I trailed off, gently grabbing her shoulders and forcing her to look at me. "Take a deep breath and take as much time as you need, okay? I'm gonna go downstairs, say hello and help her with her luggage."
"You'll be the death of me, Alex.", she mumbled in resignation, an adorable pout plastered on her lips.
"Hey, that's my line.", I smirked, leaning forward to kiss her softly. "I love you."
Receiving an amused yet shy shake of the head, I pecked her lips one more time before heading downstairs.
I couldn't blame her for going into panic mode, cause I was shitting myself as well. The fact that my Grandma agreed to come to our wedding did not mean that she was okay with it or even remotely ready to turn a new leaf with my fiancé. I knew it, she knew it, everybody knew it.
I was happy to have her here, but I was also a nervous wreck. And I had no idea what to expect to be honest.
"Grandma, hi!", I greeted, smiling warmly at her as I bounced off the last step and wrapped my arms around her.
"Hey sweetie.", she replied, tightly hugging me back. "Am I wrong or this dog keeps getting bigger?", she then questioned as Sparky was torn between greeting my Grandma and barking his head off because of the cab driver bringing my her bags inside the house.
"I wouldn't know.", I smirked, shrugging shyly as we parted from our embrace. "How have you been, Nonna?"
"Can't complain, honey. What about you?", she replied as she tipped off the driver, dismissing him.
"I'm good. Really good."
She nodded, a small smile coming my way before I noticed her eyes glancing behind me, causing me to turn around and see Ashley cautiously and uncertainly approaching us.
"Hi, Miss García. It's nice to see you again.", Ashley politely greeted, a crooked smile plastered on her lips as she joined my side.
"Wish I could say the same.", Grandma mumbled under her breath as she crouched down and grabbed one of her bags, her subtle statement not going unnoticed to either of us.
"Grandma.", I warned, shooting daggers at her as she carelessly motioned for the stairs.
Like, Jesus! She didn't even have a foot in the door and she was already treating her like shit.
"It's okay, Alex. Don't-"
"It's so not okay.", I gritted, flashing Ashley a sideway look before bringing my eyes back to my Grandma. "Can we talk? Alone?"
It was one thing that she didn't agree to us being together, but being rude and a total bitch to her was something I wasn't willing to let slide. Ever.
"I'm tired honey.", she brushed me off, already halfway up the stairs. "I'm going to get some rest."
"Well, just so you know, you're sleeping in Chase's room."
"What happened to the guest room?", she frowned, causing a cocky grin to appear on my lips as I gently snaked an arm around Ashley's waist and pulled her closer.
"It's Shay's room now."
She stared at us for what felt like ages before resuming her walk up the stairs and disappearing, mumbling something under her breath I couldn't quite catch. I stood there, subtly shaking my head at her behavior. She knew damn well Ashley had a daughter and that they moved in almost a year ago, and the fact that she felt the urge to ask, made me think she didn't even believe it in the first place.
Huffing, I pulled out my phone under Ashley's confused eyes.
"What are you doing?"
"I'm calling in sick, Ash-", I was cut off mid sentence as she snatched the phone from my hand. "What? I can't leave you here alone with her."
"Honey, I'll be fine.", she reassured, flashing me a warm smile that caught me slightly off guard. "I won't be alone. The kids will be home in an hour or so, we'll have a nice dinner and call it a day. I can handle her."
"I know you can, it's just..", I mumbled as she cupped my face and forced me to look at her. "Honestly? If this has to be her attitude for the next days, I don't even know why she bothered."
"I'll handle her.", she whispered, gently leaning forward to deliver a tender kiss to my lips.
"How?"
"I have no fucking clue.", she giggled shyly, brushing her thumbs against my cheekbones as a small smile crept up on me. "But you have a shift to get to and lives to save. I promise, I'll be fine."
"Call me if anything happens?", I whispered, giving into her words and piercing grey eyes.
"Of course baby."
"Okay well..", I sighed out loud, pecking her lips one more time before motioning for the stairs myself. "I'll go get ready then."
With my mind going hysterical, I managed to refrain from barging into Chase's room and give my Grandma a piece of my mind. As I quickly got ready for work though, the urge of doing just that got stronger and stronger by the second, hence why, on my way out, I found myself knocking on her door and opening it without even bothering to wait for a reply.
"Why can't you let this go?", I inquired as my eyes landed on her figure, already unpacking some of her stuff.
"You know why I can't."
I scoffed, profusely shaking my head as I motioned for the door, fully intending on leaving. But obviously, my brain wasn't agreeing with that.
"Well, do you wanna know what I know?", I spoke in a slow voice, not bothering to turn around and face her. "I'm happy. The happiest I've ever been actually. I wish that could be a good enough reason for you to get over it, but apparently that would be asking too much. Let me just tell you this once..", I trailed off as I fought back the tears. "Treat her like that again and you might as well wanna catch a flight back to Italy because you and your bitchy attitude won't be welcomed to our wedding."
And with that being said, I stormed off and out of the house.
What I just did broke my heart, to be honest. But it had to be said and it had to be done. I was done with her holding this fucking grudge against her.
Ashley was the woman I was going to spend the rest of my life with, and the sooner she wrapped her frickin' head around it, the better.
———
ASHLEY'S POV
"Why the fuck did I let her go to work?!", I mumbled under my breath as I busied myself in the kitchen.
I'm not gonna lie, I was scared of my own shadow.
I didn't blame her Grandma for hating me. She had every right to be mad at me for hurting her granddaughter, but I was hoping that once she knew the entire story, she'd come around eventually.
Which she didn't, obviously.
And the fact that I heard what Alex said to her Grandma before leaving wasn't helping in the slightest. In fact, that only made me even more upset cause I knew how much that woman meant to her, and Alex didn't deserve to be stuck in this situation.
But she was. We all were, in fact.
And now, as I crouched down to check on our pizza cooking in the oven, I could literally feel my heartbeat in my ears as I heard her Grandma come down the stairs, her figure appearing soon enough.
"It's- it's almost ready.", I stuttered, a nervous smile creeping up on me as she took a look around the mess that was the kitchen. "The kids should be back any minute now."
She quietly nodded, not bothering to even look my way as she walked towards the alcohol cabinet, grabbed a bottle of tequila along with a glass and sunk into her seat at the table.
Please, give me some.
I shook that thought away as I started cleaning up the best I could, a sigh of relief escaping my lips as I heard two loud voices followed by a girly squeal coming from the living room.
"Hey Ash.", both Chase and Matt appeared by my side, greeting me with a kiss on the cheek, still clearly oblivious to their Grandma sitting at the table, no doubt watching my every move.
"Hey guys.", I smiled warmly at them, my head nodding towards Gabi as a hyper Shay crashed against my legs. "Look who's here."
"No sh- ouch.", Matt chuckled as he was met by a nudge from his brother while they rushed towards her. "Hi Nonna! We thought you weren't coming before tomorrow?"
Yeah, I thought so too. Thanks, baby.
I pursed my lips together as I picked Shay up in my arms, my eyes taking in their three-way hug as I patiently and nervously waited for them to be done so I could introduce her to Gabi. But to my surprise and utmost relief, Matt walked up to me and took her in his arms, flashing me an encouraging wink before turning around.
Either Alex talked to him, or he was just amazing.
"Nonna, meet hurricane Shay.", he grinned, playfully tickling her in the sides and causing her to let out multiple giggles. "Aka, the boss of the house."
I had to smile as I took in the scene in front of me: both Matt and Chase making my daughter laugh like no tomorrow as they showered her face with kisses while their Grandma looked at them like a lost puppy. It was clear as water that these boys were head over heels for her, and I was hoping that that was reason enough for Gabi to at least be polite to her.
Cause yeah, I was dreading her attitude towards me, but I was dreading her attitude towards my daughter even more.
And judging by how hard yet effortlessly both Matt and Chase were trying to make their Grandma realize how much they cared for her, I knew they knew too.
"Hello dear.", Gabi greeted, reaching out for her and gently cupping her face as relief washed all over me. "Look at you, you're beautiful."
"Who are you?", Shay frowned, flashing her a toothy grin nonetheless.
"I'm Alex's Grandma sweetie.", Gabi smiled warmly at her. "It's nice to-
"Oh, great.", Shay cut her off, smirking. "Alex told me you make really good food, I'm hungry Alex's Grandma."
My eyes would've most certainly fallen out of their sockets if it wasn't for three loud laughs echoing in the kitchen.
This kid.
"Are you now?", Gabi chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. "Well, I was too tired to cook tonight dear, but I'm sure your mom's pizza will be just as good."
And there it was: performance anxiety.
"I-.. I highly doubt that, but we can order takeout in case.", I shrugged shyly, feeling my cheeks flush as I took said pizza out of the oven. "Shall we?"
Receiving eager nods in reply, I placed the food at the center of the table, Matt quick to cut it into slices and serve a slice each. As we silently dug in, I couldn't help but think I did more than a decent job to be honest. And I had to smile as certain memories of Alex trying to teach me over and over again came to mind, the two of us often ending up being too wrapped in each other to even bother finishing.
"Holy fluff, this is good Ash.", Matt mumbled as he chewed on his slice, flashing me a smirk. "Definitely better than your last attempt."
"That's cause we never got to even try it.", Chase teased, causing me to go red in embarrassment as I couldn't even bring my eyes to look up, let alone Gabi.
Seriously, guys?!
I was about to politely tell them to shut the fuck up when a question from Shay caused me to almost choke on my food, all eyes snapping in her direction.
"Where's mommy?", she tilted her head, frowning as she realized she was now receiving all our undivided attention.
"W-who?"
"Alex. Where is she?", she repeated, carelessly shrugging with a cheeky grin as she locked her gaze with mine.
And just like that, my heart threatened to explode. I was pretty sure I was staring at her with heart-shaped eyes, smiling like an idiot as I felt tears stinging my eyes. The tension between me and her Grandma meant absolutely nothing anymore, cause I found myself wishing Alex was here just to hear her say that and see that wonderful smile of hers plaster itself on her lips.
Cause I knew she'd be the happiest person on earth, just like I was at this very moment.
"She's at work lil sis, we'll see her in the morning.", Matt chipped in, giggling at my frozen state as I watched them in awe. "Here, clean yourself up, you're a messy eater."
"I'm not.", she grunted, taking the handkerchief that he was handing her nonetheless. "You are."
I shook my head at them in amusement as I zoned out, still in some sort of a trance over Shay calling Alex her mom, and Matt calling her his sister. I was on cloud nine, and not even the feeling of Gabi's eyes on me managed to burst the little bubble I was currently living in.
———
Before I knew it, dinner was over.
I basically kept to myself the entire time, just listening to Matt and Chase making small talk and catching up with their Grandma, every now and then interrupted by Shay's curious questions. I was glad to see that Gabi seemed eager to engage into a conversation with her instead of giving her the cold shower, which proved to me once again that she only had a problem with yours truly.
Meh, not that I needed more evidence.
Fully intending on washing the dishes and go hide in my room for the rest of the night, I silently stood from my seat and started clearing the table. Mind me, part of me wanted to confront her and hopefully put this thing to rest before tomorrow, but the other part of me was afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing and possibly make this entire situation even worse.
"That's it, I'm taking you to bed missy.", I heard Chase chuckle, which caused me to look up from the sink just to see Shay release a fat yawn.
"Not tired.", she mumbled, profusely rubbing her sleepy eyes as he picked her up and motioned towards me.
"Yeah, and I'm a mermaid.", Chase teased, gently poking her cheek and causing her to giggle. "Give your mom a goodnight kiss and stop talking dog poop."
Shaking my head in amusement, I leaned forward for Shay to plant a kiss on my cheek, my lips finding her forehead soon after.
"Goodnight baby, sleep tight.", I whispered, flashing Chase a grateful smile before they disappeared upstairs.
Bringing my focus back to the dishes I was washing, I started to grow more anxious and self-conscious by the second, as it was now me, Matt and Gabi in the kitchen. I was pretty confident Matt was going to vanish as well soon, eventually leaving me alone with her. My suspicion was proven when I heard him stand up from his seat to go open the fridge, no doubt the sound of beer bottles clashing reaching my ears.
From the corner of my eye, I saw a beer appear on the counter on my right, causing me to look up to meet amused yet concerned brown eyes flickering between me and his Grandma, still sitting at the table.
"I was going to enjoy a beer out front, but I can stay if you want.", he whispered under his breath, a small smile creeping up on my lips.
"It's okay Matt, don't sweat it.", I reassured, reaching out for his arm and giving it a gentle squeeze. "But thank you, really."
"Well, I'll be outside if you need me, okay?"
I nodded quietly at him, watching as he opened both beers, taking one and pushing the other towards me before disappearing from my sight. I smiled at the gesture, knowing full well that whether Gabi decided to have a conversation or kill me with silence, alcohol was needed either way.
I took a long sip, allowing a deafening silence to fall in the kitchen as I felt her eyes on me the entire time, causing every inch of my body to tense up as I fastened my dish washing task.
You could cut the tension with a knife, hence why I almost dropped a plate when my phone buzzed in my back pocket.
Jess 9.30pm
'You still alive, Miss Stevens?'
I stifled a laugh, subtly shaking my head at the fact that even Alex's best friend felt the urge to check up on me.
Ashley 9.31pm
'Can you die from too much silence?'
Jess 9.31pm
'Not sure, I can google it if you want.'
I was about to reply when I saw her typing again.
'Seriously though, if you want me to come over just say the word. We can tie her up in the basement and knock some sense into her, no questions asked.'
Ashley 9.32pm
'I don't think that'll be necessary, but I appreciate your support :)'
Shoving my phone back into my pocket, I briefly glanced towards Gabi just to see she was back at sipping on her tequila, her eyes fixated on the glass she was holding as she seemed deep in thought. Subtly releasing a sigh, I proceeded to clean the counter as quickly as I could, eager to get the hell out of there and in the safety of my room.
But that's when she spoke.
"You know..", she trailed off in a low voice, causing goosebumps to rise all over my skin. "I did get on a plane seven years ago to come kick your sorry ass, but little did I know that once I got here, I would've been too busy picking up the pieces. Again."
I didn't dare to look up to meet her eyes, nor did I dare to utter a word.
What happened to me or Alex after I left, that was a subject we both agreed to never bring up or talk about. I wanted at first, but she would refuse over and over again, saying that it was in the past and that it should stay exactly there, in the past.
So I stopped trying.
"Thing is.. what I had to fix was beyond anything I've ever seen, her parents included. And mind me, the reason behind you leaving is quite the story, Miss Stevens, and that itself should make me drop the grudge I have towards you, but I can't.", she stated, taking my lack of response as a go ahead for her to continue. "I can't because I can't forget how broken she was. I can't because I can't get over the fact that she almost died."
And that's when my heart stopped and my eyes shot in her direction, panic written all over me.
"W-what?", I managed to get out as I started to sweat altogether.
"Oh, she didn't tell you?", she tilted her head, sarcasm seeping from her words as it was clear as water that I had no idea what she was talking about. "Tell me, Ashley.. How would you feel if your child started drinking and snorting her life away? How would you feel if said child started to walk through life like a ghost, not talking to you let alone acknowledging your presence?"
Like fucking shit.
"Cause that was Alex for you. The loving, thoughtful and caring person she is ended up being selfish, rude, apathetic.. empty. For fuck's sake, she forgot Chase's birthday or the fact that she even had a family to take care of. It was like watching Donna all over again.", she spat, downing her glass of tequila and pouring herself another one. "When I got here, her friend Jess, God bless her soul, was already straight up kicking her ass back on track, but that wasn't enough. She wanted to stop, but she was hurting too much, not to mention the fact that she quickly became addicted to it, hence why she ended up going back to that shit several times before hitting rock bottom. That's when she finally asked for help. That's when she finally agreed to go to rehab and meetings and all that crap. It took us a year to get her back on her feet, emotionally and physically speaking..", she trailed off, unfazed by the silent tears rolling down my cheeks and looking at me dead in the eyes. "So tell me, how would you feel if your child was slowly and silently killing herself because of someone else?"
I was now basically hugging myself.
I knew Alex got into drugs when I left, and I knew that was on me. I still felt all kinds of horrible about it, but I would've never imagined that the situation was that bad. Maybe I now understood why she never wanted to talk to me about it..
"Now you're here, playing happy family and stuff..", she released a sarcastic laugh as she stood from her seat. "And you expect me to be okay with it? You expect me to just stand by and wait for you to walk all over her, again, for whatever reason? Well newsflash honey, I'm not."
I would've never guessed.
We stared at each other in utter silence, the only sound audible in the room was the one coming from the clock and from my broken yet hammering heart.
As I watched her motioning for the stairs, I tried to speak but I couldn't. I understood where she was coming from, an excruciating pain coursing through me as I tried to even imagine how hard and upsetting seeing Alex like that must've been. Seeing the strongest person I knew turn into nothing because of me..
"Before you go to bed, I'm gonna say something and you're gonna listen, whether you like it or not.", I found myself blurting out of fucking nowhere.
I was surprised myself at how confident yet shaky my voice sounded, so don't get me started on the face she pulled when she stopped dead in her tracks and turned around to face me.
"I didn't have a choice.", I stated, raising a hand and preventing her from biting back. "'You always have a choice'? Yeah, no. That's bullshit cause I didn't. Unless for 'other choice' you mean staying with her and putting her and her bothers in danger, that is.. So sue me if I chose to break her heart along with mine just to make sure they were safe. It was the most painful thing I've ever done in my entire life but guess what? I'd do it all over again. Cause let me break it to you, Miss García: this 'happy family' you're talking about? Every single one of them mean the world to me, whether you believe me or not."
"Ashley-"
"I don't want your approval.", I cut her off, successfully shutting her up for good. "I know what I did to her and I'll have to live with that for the rest of my life. Just like I'll have to work my ass off every single day to make it up to her. Cause she can tell me it doesn't matter anymore over and over again, but I know how much I hurt her, no matter the reasons behind it.", I deadpanned, taking a few steps towards her as her eyes never left mine. "But as I said, I don't want nor need your approval, cause I'm going to fucking marry her whether you like it or not. I love her, and I don't have to prove myself to anyone but her. And that's exactly what I'm gonna do."
I was pretty taken aback by the anger seeping from my words, so it's no surprise she was too. Truth to be told, I was majorly upset, so I stopped being polite, I stopped being obliging, I just spoke up, most certainly digging a deeper grave for myself but whatever.
"With that being said..", I trailed off as I passed her and lingered on the first step. "I don't care if you don't find it in you to forgive me. All I'm asking is for you to plant a smile on your face on our wedding day, cause you mean the world to her, and she sure as hell doesn't deserve you giving her shit for something I did. Goodnight."
Not bothering to even wait for an answer, I bolted up the stairs and rushed to my room.
I was an emotional mess, so needless to say that I didn't even make it to the bed that I collapsed on the floor, crying my eyes out. The more I thought about what she said, the more tears were streaming down my face, and it didn't help in the slightest when I heard Matt shouting from downstairs.
I appreciated the fact that he was defending me, but the last thing I wanted was to add fuel to the fire.
Bringing my knees to my chest, I basically started rocking back and forth as the screaming increased and multiple sobs escaped my throat. Right now, I wanted nothing more than to have Alex's strong arms around me.
I was crying so much that I didn't even realize that the argument soon stopped, let alone the faint knock on my door before I saw Matt's head popping in.
"Are you- shit.", he mumbled as he quickly took me in, closed the door behind him and rushed to my side, pulling me into a tight hug. "Hey, hey it's okay Ash, don't cry, please."
"Is- is it t-true?", I croaked out as I grabbed a handful of his shirt and pulled him closer.
"Is what true?"
"That she almost d-died?"
"Did my Grandma tell you that?", he frowned, pulling away ever so slightly to look at me, a quiet nod coming his way. "What a bitch."
"Matt!", I half chuckled half sobbed, shoving him in his chest before looking at him dead serious. "It's not?! Cause if it's not I swear to God I'm gonna kick her ass and-"
"It's not.", he deadpanned, a crooked smile making its way to his lips.
"But?", I inquired, sensing that he wasn't telling me the entire truth.
"But.. she did end up in the hospital at some point, Ash.", he stated as he reached out and wiped the tears from off my face, taking my lack of response as an invitation to go the fuck on. "What my Grandma said was true.. Alex went back to that shit several times, no matter how hard we tried to keep an eye on her. Something like three or four months after you left, she had lost a bunch of weight, she wouldn't eat or drink unless it had alcohol in it..", he mumbled, causing my heart to break all over again. "She was a mess, Ash.. she was weak, physically and mentally speaking, and she looked exhausted all the fucking time. So one day, we were making lunch and out of the blue Alex fainted and collapsed to the ground."
"Oh God.."
"Yeah..", he whispered, his jaw clenching as I realized he was fighting back tears. "We rushed her to the hospital, and it turns out she hadn't been eating for like, 4 days or so, and that along with the fact that she wasn't getting any sleep.. her body couldn't take it anymore, hence why she fainted. Wanna hear the funny part?"
"Why, there is one?", I questioned, sniffling my nose and stifling a laugh at the face he pulled.
"Jess straight up punched her in the face when she woke up, knocking her out once again for a couple of hours."
"She didn't."
"Oh, she did.", he chuckled, wrapping an arm around my shoulders and planting a kiss to my head. "That girl even asked the doctor for permission."
"I'm speechless and I feel like shit.", I mumbled, a soft chuckle escaping my lips nonetheless. "I'm sorry, Matt.. it was all my f-"
"Don't.", he cut me off, my puzzled eyes looking up to meet warm brown ones. "Yes, Alex took the fact that you left really hard, Ash.. but running face first into an addiction was her doing. Maybe she just wanted the pain to go away at first, but she knew damn well what she was doing, I mean.. have you met my mother?", he subtly teased, smirking at me and earning a shy giggle. "You did what you had to do, I'm never gonna blame you for that."
I shook my head at him as I settled back in his embrace. I wanted to let his words ease my hysterical mind and racing heart, but I couldn't. The only person that could do that was Alex herself, hence why I found myself grabbing my phone.
"What are you doing?", Matt questioned, eyeing me suspiciously.
"I'm calling Alex, I-"
"No, you're not.", he deadpanned, successfully snatching the phone from me. "If you call her, she'll rush home, see how upset you are, and go fucking bananas. You really don't want that, do you?"
"But.. she asked me to call her if anything happened?"
"And you'll tell her in the morning when you'll no longer have a tear stained face.", he smirked, giving me my phone back. "I'll allow you to text her and tell her how much you love her though."
I smiled at him, nervously biting my lip as I stared at my phone. I hated keeping things from her, even if it was for a short amount of ti-
"Woah, you're still marrying my sister, right?!", he gasped, causing me to look up and see panic written all over him.
"What? Of course I am, you dumbass.", I chuckled, earning a sigh of relief in response. "I didn't go ape shit on your Grandma just to chicken out!"
"Good.", he grinned, pulling a funny face in the process. "Speaking of which, what you did was pretty badass."
"Agree to disagree.", I smirked shyly, my eyes landing back on my phone as I typed in a quick text.
Ashley 10.46pm
'Hope your shift is going well, I love you baby. <3'
I had to stifle a laugh as her reply came immediately.
Alex 10.46pm
'What happened?'
Typing in a quick reply in order to reassure her, I threw my phone onto the bed and released a loud groan.
"There's no way in hell I'm sleeping tonight without your sister here."
"Matt to the rescue.", he goofily raised his fist before getting on his feet and helping me up, no doubt noticing my questioning look. "You, Miss Stevens, are going to pick a movie while I, your knight in shining armor, will go downstairs and grab beers, every unhealthy snack I can find, ice-cream and weed."
"Weed? Seriously?", I chuckled, shaking my head at him in amusement.
"Hell yeah, we're going to get high as motherfucking kites and forget all our problems."
Honestly? I haven't smoked weed in ten years, but the idea of letting loose and smoke my sorrows away sounded awfully great, hence why I found myself agreeing in a matter of seconds.
And just like that, a while later, I was watching a movie with Matt, Chase joining us a while later, while losing ourselves in weird conversations, smoking weed and chugging beers as I felt a college student all over again.
But mostly, I realized once again how close we were with one another, proving to me that no matter what, my family will always be there for me.