19: Fog
Teagan's body wakes up first.
The first sensation she can feel is dry pain. As if her entire insides are inflamed and there isn't a drop of water in her. She'd scream if her thoat wasn't as dry as the desert.
"She's awake."
"Hold on dears - let me fix her discomfort."
Teagan gasps as a sudden rush of liquid goes though her and her eyes flutter open. The clear air is blurry as the sun shines into the large room she's inside of.
The infirmary.
She turns her head and sees Lila and Chrys holding each other's hands in suspense.
A cool hand brushes her red curls away and she doesn't recognize the voice.
"I'll be on my way now. She's suffering aura dehydration - but I'm sure she'll be fine considering."
"Thank you Agnes.."
Teagan hears footsteps walk out of the room. She still can't think of words to say. It's as if her mind has numbed that function out of her.
"Teagan? Teagan you remember us right?" Lila says,slowly crouching at Teagan's bed side now.
Teagan swallows- expecting pain, but it doesn't hurt as bad as the expectation. 'I - do." Her brain slowly comes out of the fog its in. "I do." She repeats more firmly.
Her eyes clear now and Lila sighs in relief. "Oh, thank stars - I thought - I thought we'd been too late."
Teagan remembers now. She remembers the mage - his face - his hands - the cold lifeless eyes and his words -
"Wait for me."
She shudders.
Wait for him? Wait for what? What did that mean? She - she can't think about it... it's hurting her.
"Breathe dear. Breathe - air is your ally not your enemy."
Teagan swallows down air as Headmistress instructs her. Then she relizes, with a guilty spike that Headmistress was here - she had saved her, was helping her-
"Here." Lila tucks an arm under Teagan and helps lift her up. "Drink this." She says and bring a glass of something suspiciously green to her lips. Teagan drinks it anyway. It doesn't tast nearly as grotesque as it looks.
But after that dragon drool - nothing will ever be as nasty as that.
"Chrys made it - she says it helps her refreash her aura and - things. I didn't understand the rest." Lila admits truthfully.
Chrys smiles at her completely not offended and takes Teagan's hand earnestly. "I hope you accomplished what you needed to Teagan - you almost died a couple time this week." She says slowly.
Teagan looks at her confused. "What?"
"You've been unconscious for a week Tea - and - and we almot lost you so many times." Lila explains, her eyes get misty as she does.
Teagan swallows down some more of the drink. "I - I don't know what happened."
Headmistress stands now, her white robes glint under the bright morning sun, Teagan thinks she looks almost like an angel or some such thing.
"Ladies, I belive Ms. Monicroff needs some real rest now. Recuperating is only half done. Go and tell that lovely Mr.. Westing that she is, in fact, not dead and he doesn't have to starve himself with worry anymore. Oh - and tell him to return all those books he took from the library, Mrs. Kringle is getting ansty about them."
Lila stands slowly as Chrys nods good naturdly. They give Teagan one last look of assurance and leave the room.
Now - it's just Teagan, her guilt, and Headmistress.
"Well - are you ready to tell me what happened dear?" Headmistress says, cracking the uncomfortable silence.
Teagan slumps against the headboard of the bed she's in. "I - " She looks up at Headmistress' kind face and suddenly, she relizes what an imbecile she's been. Suspecting Haedmistress wants to do anything to her other than help her?
She's a complete moron.
She acknowledges that now - it could have been too late.
"I'm sorry." She whispers instead. Even though she wants to pour her heart out to Headmistress, but - but there are just too many words. Too many worries, to many horrors and she - she can't say them all as fast as she'd like.
So she says the next best thing. "I'm so very sorry Ma'am - I doubted you and - and I don't deserve your help." She feels the tears drip down her nose and onto the bed covers.
Headmistress sighs and puts a gentle hand on Teagan's silky wiry hair. "I understand. You weren't thinking like yourself dear - and I will not hold your suspicions against you."
Teagan nods and wipes at her tears with her palm.
"Now - why exacly did you go inside the mirror for, never mind how?" Headmistress says as she sits down next to Teagan.
"I - " Teagan sighs. Better late then never she supposes. "I wanted to destroy the dark mage inside - he - he was haunting my nightmares, then he started to talk to me through my refections then - then I just became desperate." She looks down in shame - "And I thought I could handle it."
But she couldn't'
She couldn't handle it.
She's failed again - and she's almost certain he's coming back - the uncertainty of when was what was terrifying her.
Headmistress doesn't say anything for a span of a minute. Then she stands. "I see."
That's all she says.
Then she gives Teagan a hug that the girl did not expect. At all. But she wraps her arms around Headmistress' waist anyway, hating herself even more for doubting her.
"I can only tell you dear - even though there's so much we don't understand - but I will promise you this." Headmistress says clamingly as she rubs Teagan's back. "No matter what happens Teagan. I will protect you to the best of my ability. You just have to promise to trust me no matter what. Understand?"
She looks Teagan in the eyes now.
Teagan nods without a thought.
"Good." Headmistress lets her go and moves away.
"Now get some rest - your friends will visit you later."
"Thank you." And Teagan means it. For so much more than this moment. For everything past and to pass.
For everything she doesn't desrve.
"Thank you." And she give in to the tired relief that weighs down on her eyelids. She thinks for once - she might have a moments peace, even with the dark mages shadow looming at the edges of her life.
She thinks she might be able to handle it if she has Headmistress to aid her - and her friends.
Teagan dares to hope as she drifts off to sleep.
~~~~~
The remaining months at Ridgemoor are quick and somewhat painful.
Teagan's recuperating was minimal against nurse and Lila's orders, Teagan couldn't stand laying around all day - thinking. She doesn't want to think.
So she forces herself to study. Her days are filled with stacks of books and missing homework assignments and sometimes - if she could sneak past Lila and Thad, she attends classes.
Nobody seems to know what happened to her. But students and teachers still eye her strangely.
As if she was a different person to them.
Which she was - but they didn't know the reason.
Teagan lives through these month - and she doesn't tell anyone about the constant unrest she has on her mind. She feels a dark presence behind her when she's alone sometimes, as if soething was watching her in the shadows of the library or the foyers during the day.
But she doesn't tell anyone. She doesn't want them to worry.
Besides - there's never anything there when she looks, so she chalks it up to herself being paranoiod.
Which is feasible enough .
S. A. M's roll around and Teagan finds that so is the first Gracers game against the third years - Teagan's she's missed several practices.
"Am I still on the team though?" She'd asks Gripes the day before the game.
The older man gives her a sympathetic look - he probably has some idea of what happened. "If you want to be - but I don't think you should strain yourself for this game." He explained.
Teagan had felt diaappointed at missing the first Gracers game she'd ever participate in.
But she lets it go.
Lyra's been antsy around her anyway and Teagan think perhaps she should rebuild her trust with her Pegasus first.
But she does go to the game.
She cheers Thad just as loudly as Lila and Chrys do.
"You alright about this Teagan?" Lila asks her as they snack on buttered Gops. Their like popcorn except made of large clumps of puffed rice and extra crunchy.
Teagan shrugs. "Couldn't' be helped." She admits as she crunches on the puffy rice snack loudly.
Chrys pats her kindly. "Look on the bright side - you could join next year and maybe even make captain this time!" She says happily, for once now dark underline to her bright side.
Teagan laughs and smiles at her. "Maybe I will."
~~~~~~~~
The S.A.M.'s were harder this year.
Teagan's certain she bombed at her wand ettiequte exam - oh well, Mr. Hanz didn't like her anyway. She's certain she did decent enough to pass to next year though.
She hopes anyway.
School ends soon and Teagan wonders what her parents will say when they come to get her.
She hasn't gotten any letters from them since the first one. Her letters have gone unanswered and she'd wondered if their messenger bird got lost or sick.
She supposes she'll find out soon enough.
"Wow - I did it!" Lila exclaims next to her as they stand around opening the crisp envelopes with the cream colored paper inside. The Magestry or Magic printed in bold black ink at the top and Teagan takes a deep breath as she slides the rest of the paper out.
Her anxiety releases when she sees the gold embossed stamp at the bottom that lets her know she's passed.
"Me too." Thad says in relief as she shows them his grades.
He did better than her.
Teagan grins at him - Thad was just better than all of them this year. "Congratulation Thaddeus, you can prepare your acceptance speech at beating me this year." She says patting him heartily on the back.
Thad looks at her paper, his eyes widening in surprise. Lila laughs and gives him an extra hug as Chrys smiles slowly, probably not understanding the level of importance his turn of event has..
"I - well - I probably wouldn't have, if you were at the top of your game Tea." He says kindly.
Teagan shakes her head, "Doesn't matter. you deserve this either way." She looks at him, a real smile blessing her eyes. "Thanks for being the only sane rock in my life Thad. I needed it."
He smiles back and slides an arm around her shoulders. "Anytime you need someone to tlel you your worng or isnane -let me know."
"I'll try not to take offense to your comment Teagan. Mostly because your probably right Bantu Thad being the only sane person this year." Lila says, shooting her cousins an appreciative look.
They all laugh together and it's the most wonderful sound Teagan has ever been blessed with in her entire years.
"Wonder whats hapning over there though." Lila suddenly says, catching their attention to where she was looking.
Teagan straightens, Scarrow - she hadn't seen him in weeks.
Mostly because she hardly attended classes or practice - she caught glimpses of him durning the game but - that was it. He hadn't even acknowledged her existence and- that annoyes her more than she cares to admit.
"What do you think he got?" Lila asks as they watch the boy open his envelope unceremoniously.
The contents must not have been satisfactory because his face reddens in anger and he crumples the sturdy paper into a tight wad, tosses it at the wall, and walks away with his hands jammed into his pockets.
Teagan doesn't think before she goes to pick up the crumpled result paper.
"Teagan maybe you shouldn't' " Thad says, ever sensible. Even if this involved Scarrow.
Teagan picks it up anyway, obviously not learning from past mistakes, and straightens the creases, she's surprised at herself for sort of hoping he'd at least passed.
"He passed." She says numbly.
Lila peers over her shoulder and winces. "Oh - he did worse than me though."
Chrys sigh dramatically. "I assume it's because he was distracted for most of the year." She says sagely.
Teagan gives her a curious look. "What do you mean?"
She hadn't noticed him being distracted this year, if anything, he seemed more driven and vindictive.
"Oh - nothing, it just seems like he was spacing out often and he doesn't seem to be all that emotionally stable. I saw him cying behind the benches once when I went out flying one early morning. I don't' think he would have appreciated my help though." Chrys explains nonchalantly, as if this bit of information wouldn't shock all parties present.
Scarrow cries?
Teagan suddenly feels a her thoat thicken and she has a hard time swallowing as she looks in the direction Scarrow had disappeared in.
Perhaps she wasn't the only one suffering this year after all.
~~~~~
"To surviving another year!" Thad says as they clink their glasses of sparkling giggle water together.
The girls laugh around him and follow suite.
"To surviving next year too!" Lila says, it comes off as a joke - but Teagan suspects the truth behind those words all to clearly.
Chrys gulps down her water loudly, the dining hall is buzzing with students from all years, mingling and talking and laughing - comparing their studies and making plans for next year.
Headmistress hasn't appeared at this end of the year dinner - Teagan suspect she has larger things on her mind - she worries they have something to do with her.
She certainly hopes not.
The serving dwarves are small and fast as they waddle through the milling students, everyone is mixed at their tables tonight - which is unusual in itself, dinner is more of a party than anything. There's even a magical instrument band in the corner. Teagan wonders why they changed the format of the dinner this year.
She's not complaining - she gets to eat with all of her friends wihtout imposing on Seeker students
"Excuse me students."
The din slows to a halt, even the violin piece stopes.
Students turn their eyes up to the head table and see Professor Ink standing there looking exactly the same with her tight bun and long black robe.
"As you all know - this is the end of the year and for some of you, the end of your studies here at Ridgemoor. It's been a strenuous year for all of you and I stand before you today - in place of our wonderful headmistress who regrets not being able to attend - is stand here to tell you that which you already know.
Congratulations.
Congratulations for all of your trials and errors an successes. I congratulate you in your bravery and your willingness to carry on for your future. Our world need mages like you - and we can only hope you will carry on our legacy with pride and greatness." She raises her glass to them all. "To magic."
The entire hall rings with students reply.
Teagan can't help the shiver that runs up her back as everyone takes a sip of their drinks.
She glances behind her into the unlit corner of the hall.
"To magic." She whispers to herself.
Somebody screams, startling Teagan and sending a shot of fear through her.
Henry Wiggins is jumping up and down, tugging at the seat of his pants oddly, tears brimming in his eyes at his obvious discomfort.
Chrys gasps. "Oh! He found Mr. Snappers!"
Thad burst out laughing.
~~~~~~~~~~~
"We'll miss you Tea." Lila says sadly, her lip already wobbeling as they all stand around the main entrance outside of the catle. The early summer sun beats down on them as they all crowd around to give their goodbyes before their families come to retrieve them
Teagan smiles and gives Lila a tight hug. "Don't' worry Lila - you'll get over it next year and you'll wish the summer was longer." She'd meant to make it sound like a joke. But the look that Lila gives her is anything but amused
"You better be back - and in one piece." She says sternly.
Teagan nods - not daring to promise out loud something she has no control over.
They all fall silent. Chrys stands there petting her dragon snapper calmly as the silence falls over them like a heavy blanket of uncertainty sprinkled with a dash of apprehension.
"See you Teagan." Thad says finally and let's Teagan hug him on the side. '"Don't forget, next years you have to make captain." He says gently when she lets him go.
Teagan nods, her eyes getting watery. "I will."
The courtyard starts filling more as parents start to spill into it. Teagan notices the happy tears and reunions happening around them as students are preparing to separate.
"Good bye." She says to Lila nd Thad one more time.
"See you next year." Lila calls as Thad smiles and starts walking her toward the exit.
"Don't forget to write!" Lila calls desperately before Thad yanks her out of sight.
Chrys sigh dramatically next to her. "I suppose they forgot about me. Oh well - I'm sure I'll get a better greeting next year at least." She turns those large calm eyes at Teagan, still petting her dangerous plant creature. "Bye Teagan. I'm glad I found you. Thanks for being my friend - and don't talk to nayone in dark alleyways you might find yourself in." She says brightly. "Oh -and - " She leans in as if to tell Teagan a secret. "You might want to start studying stronger spells this summer- seems like you'll be needing them."
Teagan looks at Chrys sharply. Her face stupefied.
The words she said startle Teagan and - she's not sure she understand what Chrys means . . . or what she knows.
Chrysanthemum Mainsfeild smiles brightly at her and turns around without another word, the crowd swallows her before Teagan can even ask her to clarify.
That's when Teagan realizes - that girls' been a mystery since the beginning.
They still know nothing about her.
And that's a rather unnerving thought.
She shakes off her prickling tension and turns to search fo her own parents. No need to start being paranoid again - that didn't end well last time. Beside - Chrys is always random. And strangely smart and insightful - she might know more than Teagan told her by figuring things out herself.
Teagan doesn't want to wonder what she knows though.
She walks through the crowd of people trying not to get smushed by the teary ones that can't see.
She finds a clearing and freezes.
A tall broad shouldered man with long silver snow white hair trapped in a tail behind his head stands in front of skinny Scarrow. The man's aura is imposing and tension crackles around him. He says something Teagan doesn't understand over the noise. Scarrow answers back.
Teagan gasps, slapping a hand over her mouth when the man raises his own hand and smack Scarrow across the face with the back of ot, heavy ring laden fingers scrape against the boys pale cheek. She catches sight of blood on the pale boys lip as he straightens and wipes at it his hair askew now.
She backs back into the crowd, hands clutching at her mouth and turns, running into the mess of people - hoping she hadn't been seen.
Tegaan stops at the arching exit of the castle ground and shakes the shock form her head.
She couldn't believe what she saw - she's almost certain that man was related to Scarrow - and he just - hit him. Across the face. And made him bleed.
How could a family member make their own... bleed.
She feels sick to her stomach, she wouldn't wish that kind of pian on anyone, not even her arch rival. She suddenly sees that lonely miserable boy crouched down in a corner crying all alone.
And she wonders, with great guilt - if that's what she might have been in the beginning.
She'd considered herself weak and pathetic - her drive to be better than Scarrow was the only thing that kept her from crumbling.
What had happened to him?
It was as if - he stopped trying to surpass her. And Teagan gets the feeling that, that was probably a bad thing. Competitiveness was what drove them forward and if he didn't have that anymore then -
No wonder he'd almost failed his S.A.M's.
"Teagan?" The girls swallows down her pitying guilt and looks up to see her mother. Her face pale and lips tight and thin. her hair done tightly underneath a black hat with a dark shawl around her thin shoulders.
Teagan's heart drops, her mother doesn't look well. Instead of the overwhelming happiness she expects to feel when she sees her dear mum, she feals dread.
"Where - where is father?" She asks suddenly, the realization dropping like rock at the bottom of her stomach, her body going tense as she fears the look on her mothers sunken face.
"Were is he Mum - where's my father?" Her voice rises in pitch and panic.
Her mother's eyes fill with tears. "Teagan dear - he - he's sick . . . We need to go home." And she grabs her daughter in a bone crushing hug to hide the tears that spill over her lashes.
Teagan clutches at her mothers dress like a drowning girl, the stone in Her stomach drops to her toes.
Something's wrong with her father.
Something's wrong... And she doesn't know what it is.
At this desperate thought, Teagan's entire world shatters in front of her eyes.