I'm Messed Up and Proud! [A S...

By I_am_a_psychopath

509K 14.5K 3.6K

Welcome to the main character's insanity and the ninja world! Lian Titen, the protagonist in this story, make... More

~Prologue~
First Day of the Academy
Fast Forward A Few Years...
Iruka-Sensei Always Ruins Prank-Time!
The Graduation Exam? Bring It On!
The Sorting Sensei!
Smoking Hurts
Slide to the Next Team
Yawn! Here We Go Again!
Test Time
The Results Are In...
We Don't Want Any More 'D'
Steve
To the Land of Waves!
Cow-Man vs Team 7 and annouying bridge builder [Part 1]
Cow-Man vs Team 7 and anouying bridge builder [Part 2]
Okay, who kindnapped me? Was it you?! ¬.¬ or you....<.<
THE MOST EPIC FLIGHT EVA!!!....and yes...I DID say sensai...
Damn you trees! And...STEVE!!!!!! AHHH!!
Die Sakura!!!........DIE!!!!
Wow, this? This is a normal day?
Ha Ha! You don't get a bed to sleep in Sakura! KARMA!
......I have no words.....just....yeah.....
My middle name is....
The little red-headed ninja
The starting fight and...Naruto...
Ugh...what happened?...oh, hi Haku...wait a second...WHAT?!?!?
The Sand Ninja
The Chunnin Exams? Sweetness!
Sakura's party
Yet another little random filler!!!....you probably hate me now...
The first test is...getting to the test -_-l l
Bring. It. On!
The First Exam is...a written one...of coarse...
Confusion in the exams!! Well...I am here so...
Into the Forest of Death
The Fight!!
The Sound Ninja? ...why didn't you kill Kabuto?
Story Time!
The Preliminary?!
Continue of the preliminary round
HARLEM SHAKE
Just another 'average' day
WHAT'D YOU CALL ME?!?!?
Our latest prank XD
I need to find someone to train me!
Fido-Sensei
Arguements
Explaining to Naruto and Steve
Mini Mission: Getting Ramen!
The Truth
Time Skip!
Yet again, a filler! XD
I swear! This isn't a filler!
Let the Hunger Games BEGIN!
Well, this is fun...
Ugh! Why me?
What sort of 'revenge' IS THIS?!
The Story behind Rido and Fido Titen! - NEXT TIME!
The Story behind Fido and Rido Titen!
Akatsuki members aren't too terrible...
I'm Back!
This is the life!
The Search For Haku
The Search For Lian
CHRISTMAS SPECIAL
Yum....Sushi....
Let the Battle Commence
The Lian Rap!
Flappy Bird!
The Legends
Guess who's back...back again!
Cliffhangers, no more!
So much confusion!
Help me my friends!
Disaster of a Date
Happy Birthday Lian
The Last BBQ Together
That Stupid Duck!
You again?!
Turtles!
Yo! It's you guys! Slumber party!
I'm Back Fools!
Nat Should Change his Career
Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year
Remember?
Promises
Absolutely Not?
IT WAS YOU ALL ALONG
Conspiracies!
A Lot Has Happened...
Thank You <3
~Epilogue~
HEADS UP

Esca-pe!

1K 76 23
By I_am_a_psychopath

(Lian's POV)

"Hee-ya!"

"You don't need to make the sound effects." Fido said laughing at me.

"But Poe said- of course I don't have to do I?" I sigh, rolling my eyes at the laughing boy at the other side of the training hall.

"YOU WONT BE LAUGHING FOR LONG, JUST YOU WAIT!"

"Let's continue you, so your sensei teaching you the hurricane jutsus?" Fido asked.

"Yeah, I can get up to 1.4 or something." I said pretty proud of myself.

"8.9"

"Fuck you, up the ass, with a cactus."

"You're mean!"

"I'm just fabulous!" I say flipping my hair.

Because spending my time doing nothing while the place is on lock down, I decided to spend my time training so I'm not completely out of it when I return home.

......Okay! There is literally NOTHING to do down here! So why not train?

"Alright, I wanna improve on my speed!" I said to my brother.

"What about something else?" he asked glancing to the side where Orochimaru and Kabuto were watching Poe and Fizzy spar, and occasionally giving instructions to Sasuke on how he should train.

"What? Why?" I ask, "I wanna know how to move like I did when Kabuto was attacking Tsunade."

"Yeah, but-"

"Speaking of which...." I mutter and take out one of my hand guns aim and fire a bullet at Kabuto who manages to move out the way just in time.

"Why were you trying to hit me?!" he yelled, glaring daggers at me.

"No reason." I shrugged. "you just kind of annoy me!"

"Why you..."

"Come on~" I say to Fido. "Please~?"

"No. I can't, Lian." He replied quietly.

"Why not?" I ask.

"I'll tell you later, in fact, ask Rido."

"When am I gonna see Rido?" I say tilting my head to the side in confusion.

"What? Did you really think that they'd just let you go that easily?" Fido said glaring at the leaches at the other side of the room.

"Well...."

"Exactly." he said. "So, pack tonight because he'll hopefully be here tomorrow."

"Tomorrow?!" I yell.

"Shhhhh!"

"What's happening tomorrow?" Fizzy asks.

"Ugh....Sasuke's birthday!" I declare.

"My birthday was last mon-"

"Hush!" I whisper, covering his mouth. "Poor boy, doesn't know when his own birthday is."

"Lian, can you just-"

"Right, I'm hungry! Catch you people later." I declare and rush out of the hall, towards storage where the food is kept.

I take some food packets filled with a variety different, guess what, FOOD, and head to my room which I have been sharing with Fido.

Yeah, he's been sleeping on the floor during my stay here.

I didn't have it much better, the beds are extremely uncomfortable, like the bed couldn't be more uncomfortable if it tried!

I grab a bag from under the bed and fill it with the packets of food, I stuff a blanket and the clothes I've been wearing.

No!!!

NOOOO!!!!

NOT OROCHIMARU'S CLOTHING LINE!!!

I'm not a fan.

I've just bored a variety of people's clothes, from Fizzy to Sasuke, from Fido to Poe.

Kabuto can keep his stinking clothes, and Orochimaru can just....leave.

The "Snake Follower's" clothing line makes tones of money every year, but I don't know how!! I mean, the clothing isn't even that appealing!!

Looks hella hard to put, hella hard to move in, and it does not flatter anybody's figure.

.....I can talk fashion! Gurl, you don't know me!

A knock at the door, and there appears my brother.

"I just got word from Rido, tomorrow early in the morning when every is asleep he'll be waiting a little away from the entrance." he whispered, "I'll make sure you get to him then run back before anyone notices I've left."

"Alright, but can I ask one thing?"

"No I'm not coming with you, you know I'd love to but - "

"Nah, your sorry ass can stay here if it wants, I'm getting outta here." I say.

"So cold...."

"But, I was wondering if you could help me bust a friend of mine out..." I said.

"....what friend?" Fido asked narrowing his eyes. "Cause if it's that weird fish guy then no way! Nu uh! That guy is-"

"What? No! I don't know no fish people!" I say confused. "I'm talking about Lawrence."

"Oh, right." Fido muttered, "Yeah okay, sure."

"Alright, thank you!" I grin hugging him.

"Well, this sleepover has been fun, but I guess it's time for you to go home now kid." fido sighed ruffling my hair.

"Alright," I laugh, "Don't get all sentimental and emotional on me now!"

"But....I DONT WANT YOU TO-"

"SHUT UP!"

- - - - - - - - - - -

5am

Fido and Lawrence at the ready

Lian blinking, desperately trying to wake up

"Lian, come on." Fido whispered as we moved across the corridors. "Gotta get there before they wake up."

I nod my head and yawn. "I know."

".....I've got the cutest sister in the whole wide world and don't you forget it!"

"Okay..." Lawrence nodded giving him the awkward thumbs up.

We made it to the entrance and Fido managed to open it up with a jutsu of some weird sort.

We rushed out, quietly, somehow, and made out way through the forest, towards a river.

When we made it to the river and stopped to catch a breath, a shadow appeared in front of us.

That shadow being -

- - - - - - - - - - - -

....MWAHAHAHAHHAAH

IMMA SO EVIL

This chapter is probably not as long as I think it is.....damnit....

Okay, so because EXAMS are coming up I WILL NOT BE ABLE TO UPLOAD as often as I would like

BUT I am going to try and UPDATE ONCE A WEEK
What day I will upload I don't know yet, maybe a Friday?

Yeah, let's make it EVERY FRIDAY

And I can try to throw some extras I there if I have the time.....yeh, we all know how often that'll happen...

Okay, sorry for the late-ish upload, sorry for the cliff hanger XD, and sorry for the short chapter

Much love to the homies!!

LOVE YOU GUYS FOREVER

PSYCHOPATH OUT

Lel

You thought I ended it there

Okay, now you've read all that important ish

NO MORE COMMERCIAL BREAK
BACK TO THE STORY

- - - - - - - - - - -

-Kabuto!

"What're you doing up so early in the morning?" he asks as well all freeze.

"....If we don't move he won't see us." I whisper keeping still.

"I can't hear you." He says walking over to us.

"....Sh....its working..." I whisper.

"I swear, you -"

"HEEYA!" I scream as I karate chop his neck, knocking him out when he was close enough.

I grin, "I did it!"

"Good job..."

Another shadow appears, this time it's Rido!

"Rido!" I cheer, hugging my big brother. "you're alive!"

"Well, duh!" he answers smirking, "I'm not gonna die before this loser does."

"Don't talk about Lawrence like that!" Fido says gasping, covering the boy's ears. "He's sensitive!"

"What's he doing here?"

"He's coming along for the ride." I say shrugging, "couldn't leave him in there so...yeah!"

"Alright, we need to go, now." Rido states and looks at Fido for a second before the two nod at each other.

I quickly hug Fido tightly. "I'll miss you..."

"I'll miss you too, sis..."

I release the embrace and join Rido who hands me my backpack.

I shrug it on and wave at Fido who nods and goes back to the base, with an unconscious Kabuto being dragged behind him.

I hope he'll be okay...

- - - - - - - - - - -

"So...one of your brothers works for Orochimaru?"

"Yup."

"Another one is in the Akatsuki?

"Yup."

"And you are part of the Leaf village."

"Yes, where are you going with this?" I question Lawrence.

"Nowhere..." he replies.

"Quiet down you two, we'll be reaching the border soon and then you're home free." Rido whispers.

We zip it and continue to move forward.

"Can we take a break?" I ask Rido yawning. The sun was pretty high up in the sky now, probably lunch time now.

"....Fine." he sighs. "There's a small town nearby so we can go there and get some food."

As Rido takes his cloak off, I notice the way he seems to discard it carelessly into his backpack, not caring for it.

As we enter the village we stay close together, try not to separate much in the crowd.

"Mama! Mama! Look at her hair!" a little girl yells pointing at me.

"What about my hair?" I ask.

"It's really really long!" she says grinning, "and really red!"

"Red is the best colour, especially for hair!" I say grinning back down at her.

"I think black is a nice colour...." Rido mutters.

"What's wrong with nice old brown hair...?" Lawrence also mutters, arms crossed over his chest.

We continue walking through the small village, every here seems so happy!

Lawrence drags me and Rido into a small cafe and we order some food and drinks with Rido's money.

He rolls his eyes at our empty hands. "you guys..."

Once we were finished with our lunch, we head out, intending to leave the town when there's a sudden bang from up above.

A giant bird?

"Damnit..." Rido curses and grabs my arm and begins to run out of the town.

"Run! Now! Move it!"

"Hey-"

"I said move it or lose it!"

"Why're we running?" I ask.

"Keep moving!" Rido yells back, keeping a hand on my arm.

"We're leaving Lawrence behind-"

"He either makes it on his own or doesn't." Rido says.

"What're you-"

Sudden explosions are heard behind us and I'm knocked to the floor with my brother above me as another explosion closer goes off.

"You okay?" Rido asks sitting up.

"Yeah..." I say cough as the smoke reaches us.

Wait, where's Lawrence?

There's a groan of pain and I'm rushing through the fallen trees and roots that have appeared.

I reach Lawrence who is silently crying.

"Lawrence! What's wrong?" I ask and cough once more as the smoke gets to me.

As it clears up a bit, I notice that his leg is trapped.

"Rido! Help!" I call as I grab the fallen tree and attempt to lift it.

"It's no use...." Lawrence sighs, tears still escaping his eyes.

"No, you're fine! We just gotta get this off you and then we can get Grandma Tsunade to fix you up!" I say smiling at him.

"Lian, his leg isn't trapped, it's completed crushed." Rido says appearing.

"What do - "

"He'll never walk again." he states coldly, "he can never be a ninja."

I glance back at Lawrence who continues to cry and he starts to sob.

I cower back slightly, I'm useless in these situations....

So, instead of trying to say anything, I just sit next to him and comfort him, letting him cry on my shoulder.

And I don't say anything at all, not even "it's fine" or "you'll be okay" because to be honest, I can't say that with certainty.

"What'll we do?" I ask Rido.

Rido glances down at Lawrence and then the crushed leg, and sighs.

"I'll sort him out....why don't you go find somewhere and set up camp for the night, today's been far too long." Rido says.

I nod, "okay."

Lawrence grabs my arm and looks me in the eye with the most terrified look I've ever seen on any person.

"Please....dont leave me here....dont leave me to die..."

"....We won't leave you." I promise and move away, "we will help you."

"Lian." Rido says grabbing my shoulder, "Do me a favour?"

"Sure."

"If you hear him screaming, just continue what you're doing."

"Why?" I ask suspiciously.

"Because," he says and whispers, "I need to remove his leg and that isn't exactly a nice thing to go through."

I nod my head 'okay'

- - - - - - - - -

As I'm setting up camp, the sound of Lawrence screaming, begging for the pain to stop is kinda hard to ignore.

There are moments of silence where he must have passed out from the pain but then he's awake again and the yelling continues.

I've managed to clear a small area out a bit, preparing a fire for later, and stacking some soft looking moss into piles for something comfortable to sleep on.

Hopefully.

I also managed to catch a fish!

Literally!

A some-sort-of-bird-of-prey was flying overhead and dropped it while I had my hands out!

Amazing, huh?

The yelling has stopped for a while and soon appears Rido with a knocked out Lawrence on his back.

He places him down on the small pile of moss and gets the fire started as it was getting dark.

"The village was blown up...why?" I asked.

"I don't know, but I may have an idea of who blew it up." Rido grumbled.

"Who?"

"Ah, nobody." he says stretching. "Get some rest, I'll wake you up when it's time to eat."

"Okay..."

"Goodnight."

"Good evening." I reply, laying down.

- - - - - - - - - -

Okay, NOW it's time for the outro ^.^

Hope you enjoyed this chapter!

Next one will be up hopefully on Friday/Saturday!

One can hope...

I wish you the best of luck on your lives and PEACE!

PSYCHOPATH OUT

Continue Reading

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