T/W~
Cussing
Serious topic
"Willow Woodberry... Is Willow Woodberry here?" The teacher called. Willow spoke up "H-here!" The teacher glared at Willow and said "Try to answer sooner" Willow nodded and started sliding down in their seat, embarrassed
After school-
Willow walked home for the millionth time this year. They are always left behind, why would they wanna stay behind for a piece of trash? Willow sighed halfway, flopping down. "My instrument is much more heavy when I carry it for a while"
They got up again, walking even more. When they got home, it was almost 5:30. They quickly did all of their homework and chores. They checked their grades, seeing they were failing most of them. They sighed, lying in bed curled up. "First... Being forced to eat breakfast this morning, second being late for class because I was helping a student, third missing yet another orchestra concert" they muttered
"Why can't I do anything right? Why do I gotta fail at everything? Why do I have to be... Depressed... No you aren't depressed Willow, you are very emotional" Willow glared at themself in the mirror. They scratched at their scab filled arms, not wanting their stupid scabs
Their arms were filled with bloody spots where the scabs were. "Fuck-" they muttered under their breath. They ignored it, thinking about an excuse to tell everyone they know about it. They glanced at their cat and said "I can't keep on blaming my cats...." They sighed, walking out of their room. They were very embarrassed about their body. They didn't know why either...
Bark decided it was a good idea to sneak into Willow's house while they were doing something. Willow had the bathroom door open, since their parents never came home until late and their siblings were all traveling somewhere else.
Bark silently crept towards the bathroom and heard... Crying? She peeked into the bathroom slightly and saw Willow's arms for the first time in the longest time. Willow was stuck in their little world, being silently bullied in their own head.
Bark saw Willow had scabs all over their arms. She didn't understand exactly why Willow had scabs. Willow wasn't really the type to have scabs all over, Bark thought. Willow yelled out "LEAVE ME ALONE!" They then started to mutter the things going on in their head.
"Monster. Fatass. Cunt. Bitch. Fat. Pig. Slut. You don't deserve to be alive. Millions of other people are committing suicide, while they don't deserve it. You deserve it. No one would care if you would up and leave this stupid world. Everyone would be happier without you. Your parents would be happier without you. Your siblings would be happier without you. All your friends and best friends would be very glad once you gone. And Bark. Bark wouldn't even care that you're gone. She doesn't even love you like you like her..."
Bark looked very confused. Why was Willow saying those words. She made the mistake by saying "What do you mean?" Willow turned towards Bark in surprise, quickly pulling down their sleeves. They quickly closed the bathroom door and locked it, their heart racing.
Willow muttered under their breath "Fuck..." They took a deep breath before trying to act normal. They opened the door and saw Bark standing there, a worried expression on her face. Bark asked "Do you mean those words..?" Willow faked laughed a little too hard and lied "What? Of course not! I... I knew you were there!"
Bark looked at her with a worried look and said "I'm worried about you Willow..." Willow looked at her, trying to laugh before saying "W-what? Why?" Bark grabbed thier shoulder and said "You know exactly why, Willow... You've been lying to me..."
Bark continued "I can tell... We've been best friends for so long and yet you still lie to me. Is there somehow wrong with me?!" Willow sighed and said "It's nothing wrong with you..! It might as well me for God's sake.."
Bark whispered "Please... Tell me... Were those words you called yourself truth? Are those words things you see in yourself...?" Willow was trying their hardest not to cry. They heard their voice crack as they lied"O-Of cOuRsE nOt!"
Bark gently grabbed Willow's arm and said "Please... Don't lie.... Spill every thing out..." Willow shook their head, pulling their arm away before closing the door. They yelled to Bark "Just go away! Just... Just please go away! I need some time to myself!"
Bark wanted to know exactly what was going on with Willow. She said "I'm... I'm sorry for bothering you" Bark sighed and said "I'm... I'm Going to leave now... Call me if you need help..." She walked out the house and to her own home.
Bark went on a giant research mission about Willow. Willow walked out of their bathroom, feeling shaken up. They pushed away the only known person who they trusted. They shook their head and instead cooked something for themselves and went lazy by reading and playing their phone.
Not like their parents would care. They decided to go onto their therapy chat filled with people who can relate to their problems. Willow knew that themself had depression, moderate depression to be specific, but they wouldn't admit it to themself. Well actually they self diagnosed themself... So..
After all of the research, Bark didn't have any results. She didn't have enough evidence, besides the scene she experienced earlier with Willow. She tried everything to research what was wrong. She sighed and said "Please... Try to make it more easier for me Willow... "
Willow saw no one replying yet. They went on to google hangouts to talk to Maple, their other best friend, about their episode and what happened. Only Maple was the only IRL best friend they had, that knew they had depression.
Maple had been insisting that Willow got Therapy from a REAL therapist, but Willow always, and I mean always, turned down her offer. Now that Willow is much more older, their depression has been getting a bit worser. Their episodes Have been really affecting their personal life.
Willow constantly felt like Committing the only way they could finally be free, but they never went through it. They even made a suicide note when they were 12 for God's sake. They saw Maple didn't respond yet, so they got up and marked their wrists with a red pen, so they didn't cut again.
They had promised Maple to never cut again, and if they did cut then Maple will physically drag them into therapy. Just imagine a 5'1 girl dragging a 5'7 person into a building. Yeah, that's basically how it will look.
Willow only self harmed through digging their nonexistent nails into their skin and making dents or magically cutting with their nails. They sighed and felt the buzz of their phone against them. They picked it up and stared at what Maple responded with.
Maple🍁- Did you at least tell her about your depression?
Willow🌲- Maybe...
Maple🍁- You can't just pass it off near her. She has the right to know. It worries me that you don't trust your own crush with your personal issues! She's been your best friend for 6 years, and you never told her
Willow🌲- Well I'm sorry that I'm constantly worrying about her leaving me if I tell her. I trust you with this information because I know you will help me through my worsening depression
Maple🍁- Willow. You know I love you and all, but this is a threat If you won't tell her. I will personally tell her, then sign you up for a therapy meeting
Willow🌲- I... I'll tell her..
Maple🍁- Pinky Promise?
Willow🌲- Pinky Promise
Maple🍁- Good
Willow sighed and slowly ate the slightly burnt food they cooked. They turned on the radio and watched YouTube, watching theory videos. They weren't constantly depressed. It was only every now and then they would go through an episode.
It was usually triggered by being yelled at, causing them to walk to the bathroom and feel worthless in there. Usually their episodes lasted up to near 30 minutes. They suddenly heard the door bell ring, and they got up to check who was at the door.
It was some door to door Christian who was obsessed with the bible. Willow just said "I'm not interested in your religion" They closed the door in her face and went back to their theory videos. They kept on getting messages from Bark, so they decided to read them.
Bark🌈-Willow?
Bark🌈- Willow I need to talk to you about what happened today...
Bark🌈- I need to know why you just suddenly lashed out like that...
Bark🌈- Is this a cry for help?
Bark🌈- Who hurt you? Do I need to beat someone's ass?
Willow🌲- No one hurt me... I want to tell you... But I'm so scared to...
Bark🌈- I'm not gonna force it out of you.. Just tell me when you feel ready...
Willow🌲- It's like a bandaid... I just need to rip it off...
Willow🌲- The thing is... No... I can't say it... I'm too scared...
Bark🌈- It's okay... You can tell me later...
Willow looked at what Bark said and muttered to themself "I wanna tell you now... But I can't..." Willow scratched at their arm, staring at their phone. They quietly sighed and got out of bed. They watched some light-hearted and funny content on YouTube. They were smiling. They fell asleep in the couch and woke up at 4 am.
They couldn't fall back asleep so they just watched something. The voices were creeping back up and Willow could only listen to them. They turned off their phone, trying to fall back asleep. They couldn't. The voices were getting louder and louder. They were now shouting harsh words at Willow.
They were yelling at Willow to just kill themself already. To end the pain of living. Willow was frozen in fear. They felt like they couldn't breathe. They looked down and saw their entire arm filled with blood. Before they knew it, they started choking themself. They couldn't breathe. They were getting lightheaded. At the last moment, they let go. They started heaving for air.
They started sobbing quietly. They stared off into space, thoughts filling thier head. They started banging their fists and wrists into their right thigh to the point they felt like it was shattered. Willow started falling asleep, the pain being the only thing going on through thier head. Once they woke up, they tiredly grabbed their things and went onto the bus.
They only went on the bus in the morning. Why? Because their parents said so. Bark didn't say anything about what happened the day before. Or maybe she did. Willow wasn't really too focused on Bark. Their mind was all scrambled. They immediately failed a test they were supposed to study for. They were yelled at by their coach for not getting their papers signed.
They also were interviewed by their teachers as to why they're failing. Their parents were called to the school to meet with their teachers, but they couldn't come because they had so much work. Willow stared at the floor, suddenly being put on the spot by their teacher. They got the answer wrong and everyone was laughing at them. Or so it seemed.
Willow went home that day and jabbed themself in the arm with a knife. They texted Maple real quick.
Willow🌲: I can't take living anymore
Willow🌲: It's too painful
Willow🌲: Please don't worry about me...
Willow placed their phone in thier pocket, walking into their parents room and grabbing a small handgun. They walked outside and walked into the forest behind their house. They went deep into it. Bark saw Willow suspiciously going to the forest. She didn't see they had a gun. Willow went deep into the forest and Bark didn't loose them.
Willow took out what looked like a peice of paper and quickly looked at it. They placed it back into their pocket. They sighed, letting tears fall down. They took the gun and looked at it before shooting themselves in the head through the bottom of their chin. The gun didn't go off that day. It got jammed and Bark stopped them. Willow fell to their knees, quietly crying. All they heard was Bark say "Why..?"