*AN* Don't worry! This chapter is not angsty, you're welcome. :)
After the long conversation and reveal of Camila's harsh attempt scars, the two girls were exhausted. Camila had fallen asleep first, worn out from an unexpected anxiety attack after the stressful conversation, and Lauren fell asleep shortly after. It was now Wednesday morning, two nights after the younger girl's suicide attempt. She was exhausted and so was Lauren. Usually Lauren worked at the diner on Wednesday's, but someone offered to take her shift for her, leaving her with a free day. She had woken up in the morning with Camila still asleep on the couch next to her. The girls weren't super close, but they were getting there. After all, they were just friends, right? Whatever they were, Lauren wanted to be there for the girl. The green eyed girl checked the time on her phone and saw that it was 9:30 in the morning, that was later than she usually slept. Feeling hungry, the girl slowly slid off of the couch to find something to eat. She walked a couple steps when she was stopped by a hand gently grabbing her wrist. The girl looked down and saw Camila looking up at her, "Um. C-can you make me something? I don't know if I'll even be able to eat, but I wanna try, if that's okay?" Lauren nodded at her with a soft smile and helped the girl off the couch. The younger one slowly made her way to the kitchen to sit at the island while the other girl made eggs and toast. This was going to be difficult for the brown eyed girl, since she hadn't eaten a lot in the last few days. She knew her old habits were catching up to her. Part of her wanted to let the habits and thoughts creep back in, but the other part just wanted to be free and not care about calories.
Camila cringed and almost gagged at the smell of food, she tried to hide it, but it didn't go unnoticed by Lauren, "You alright?" The girl just nodded and started biting her lip. When the food was done, the older girl brought it over to where they were sitting and began eating. She tried not to look at Camila, knowing that it might make the girl more nervous about eating. She looked down and saw the younger girl's girl bouncing under the table, "Hey, don't do that." Lauren paused for a second, "I know you think doing that'll burn the calories off, but it isn't good for you to think like that. Just take your time, if you can't eat it, it's not a big deal." Camila nodded softly and picked up a forkful of eggs, quickly stuffing them into her mouth before she could change her mind. She squeezed her eyes shut, chewed quickly, and swallowed. As soon as she swallowed, she dropped the fork, and put her head in her hands, bouncing her leg quickly. She spoke up quietly, "I can't eat anymore. I know I only ate a forkful, but I can't. Sorry I wasted your food." Lauren shook her head, "It's okay. No one asks you to do anything but try, I know it's hard." The young girl thanked the other one and made her way back to the couch to watch tv.
After a couple hours of watching tv, Lauren got bored, "Hey, what are you doing today? It's really pretty outside and I could use some sun." Camila thought for a minute and replied, "I actually don't have anything to do today, what do you have in mind? I could use some sun too. I'm tired of being cooped up in rooms all day." She stood up and stretched, making her way to the window to look outside. It was a nice sunny day, perfect for going to the beach. Camila decided that would be fun, that was something she'd definitely be up for doing. She proposed the idea, hoping the other girl would agree, "What about the beach? I haven't been in forever and it's so nice out today." Lauren's face lit up as she smiled widely at the idea. Lauren's favorite place was the beach, she hadn't been in forever. "I was literally about to say the beach! You read my mind. There's no decision to make now, the beach it is!"
The girls both got ready, slipping clothes over their swimsuits and putting on sandals, so that they wouldn't get sand in their other shoes. After they were done getting dressed, Lauren grabbed her keys and ushered Camila out of the apartment, locking it on the way out. The two girls walked to the parking lot and got into Lauren's car, since she was the better driver, and started on their way to the beach. Camila and Lauren both stayed silent on the drive over, both concerned with the same thing. Lauren hadn't been to the beach since she had been diagnosed with depression, she was scared to show her scars. They were big and ugly, she didn't want people to stare. Camila, was also worried, especially about the two new scars she had gotten. She wondered if Lauren was thinking about the same thing.
Lauren pulled into a parking space near the beach and turned the radio down, "All ready to go?" Camila nodded her head and replied excitedly, "Yes, I can't wait to get in the ocean!" Lauren grabbed their towels and bags as they found a spot on the beach to sit. The girls spread out their towels and sat down, taking in the view. The sat there for a few minutes thinking about whether they actually wanted to get in the water, scared of the people staring at their scars. Lauren broke the silence, "You getting in the water?" The younger girl nodded, "Maybe, just thinking about if I want to take this jacket off or not." The green eyed girl knew she was scared of showing off the scars on her arms, they were pretty visible, but Lauren knew what it felt like, "Yeah me too. I've actually never worn short sleeves since I did all of this like 3 years ago." She replied, pointing towards the scars on her own arm. "Take off your jacket, I won't judge. Plus, they kinda look badass." Camila shrugged, "I guess I will, but only if you do it." She said it with finality, aiming to strike a deal, so that both of them would be in their swimsuits for the first time in years. Without agreeing, Lauren took off her long sleeve shirt and dramatically threw it to the side, revealing both of her scarred up arms, "Your turn, Frankenstein numero dos." Camila rolled her eyes and began taking her shirt off as well, "Frankenstein isn't actually the monster, but I get what you're trying to say." She threw her jacket and shirt to the side and smirked slightly. "God, we look kind of messed up right now, don't we?" Camila and Lauren broke into laughter, they knew people would stare, but now they didn't care since they were both doing it. Lauren stood up, sliding her shorts off and the younger girl did the same, brushing the sand off of the backs of their legs as they started walking to the water. Camila noticed people starting to look, so she subtly flipped them her middle finger as she walked by them, feeling proud of herself.
After three hours of playing in the ocean, both girl's faces were slightly raw from the saltwater, so they decided to go back up to their towels and lay out to tan. Camila lied on her stomach and Lauren did the same, both girls soaking in as much sun as they could get. "You know, this is the first time in a while that I've felt good." Camila looked over at Lauren, trying to explain her feelings. The green eyed girl smiled a little at her at, "Me too, Camz. Sun is good for you, it's supposed to make you happier. I always thought that was a fucked up lie my parents would tell me, so I would leave my bed, but it looks like they were right." Camila blushed at the new nickname, Camz. No one had ever called her that before. It was cute. "Camz?" Camila questioned, wondering where the nickname came from all of the sudden. Lauren looked down at her hands, slightly embarrassed, "Oh-uh- I just figured that since I had a nickname, you should have one too. I'll call you something else, if you want." Camila smiled and shook her head, "No Laur, I like it, it's cute." The green eyed girl blushed slightly and nodded. The younger girl got butterflies in her stomach when she saw the other girl blush. Little did she know, the other girl was thinking the same thing. Both girls stopped talking and laid their heads down, silently tanning on their towels. They flipped onto their backs halfway through, so the tan wouldn't be uneven. You'd be surprised at how many times Camila had tanned one side and not the other. When they were done tanning, the girls were both sleepy from being in the sun for so long. They weren't the miserable type of sleepy, but the 30 minute nap sleepy. "I'm kind of tired now, wanna start heading back?" Camila asked. Lauren sat up from her towel, "Yeah, I was actually going to say that. I'm so sleepy now." They stood up and gathered their things, shaking the sand off of their towels and wrapping them around their bodies. The ran to the car because the sand felt like it would burn their feet if they stood on it for too long. Lauren ended up getting to the car first, seeming to have had no trouble running such a long distance. Camila, on the other hand, jogged up 5 minutes later, breathing heavily, "God Lauren, how'd you run so fast?
I feel like I'm dying." Lauren shrugged and turned to look at her. "I played a lot of softball." She flipped her hair and got into the car, turning the air on full blast. They girls headed home shortly after. Camila had fallen asleep with her head against the window. Lauren wished she could fall asleep, but she would have to wait until they got home. She eventually passed the diner, looking inside to see that it wasn't busy that day. After passing the diner, she pulled into her usual parking spot and turned off the car. "Camz, we're back home." The green eyed girl softly shook the other girl's shoulder, gently waking her from her little nap. Camila stretches and got out of the car, waiting for Lauren to grab her stuff and lock the doors. They both walked into the building together and got into the elevator. The brown eyed girl broke the silence, "I think I'm gonna try and stay in my apartment for the rest of the day, I'm so tired." Lauren pressed the door open button and turned to face the younger girl, "Okay, that's fine. Let me know if you need anything, seriously." Camila nodded and went into her apartment. The cool air conditioning soothed her tanned skin as she walked inside. She carefully walked past the bathroom, peeking in to see that it was all cleaned up. Thank you Lauren. She thought to herself. She walked to her bedroom and picked out an oversized hood and some underwear, and changed into the clothes. She liked big hoodies because then, she didn't have to wear pants, it was so comfortable. She flung herself onto her bed and fell asleep, exhausted from being out in the sun all day. Lauren did the same, sleeping in her bed for the first time in a while.
Both girls slept through dinner time and woke up at eight o'clock at night, surprised at how long they slept. Lauren got up first, pulling on some leggings and a cropped shirt. She decided to go check on Camila and see if she was feeling up to eating anything. The girl still hadn't gone grocery shopping for her new apartment, so all she had were small snacks and microwave meals. Camila woke with a knock on her door, already knowing it was Lauren. She pulled on some shorts and opened the door, rubbing her eyes. The older girl ran her hand through her hair, "You want something to eat? I have salad." The younger girl thought for a minute, realizing that salad was healthy, and agreed. She grabbed her phone and locked her apartment, following Lauren to hers. The two girls ate dinner silently, Camila having no problem with eating the salad. She was starving, she hadn't eaten a meal in almost 3 days. She ate her first helping of salad and then got a second helping. She didn't feel guilty for getting the second one. Lauren spoke up when she was almost done eating, "I really don't know how you went so long without eating, I can barely go two hours without food. Eat as much as you want, salad won't make you fat Camz." Camila chuckled to herself and ate the rest of her food happily. This was the first time she really felt good after eating. Usually she felt so guilty that she would either go to sleep or she would have to throw it up later. Today, she did neither of the two, she just sat and talked with Lauren for a while.
"Thank you, Laur. For not making me feel weird about everything." Camila rested her head on her hand and played with her sleeve. The green eyed girl slouched down on the couch and turned to look at the girl, "You don't always have to thank me. I know what it's like. Plus, we're friends now, that's what friends do for each other." Camila nodded, looking at the floor. Friends. She liked the sound of that. She finally had a friend, a real one. "Wait, sorry. Are we friends Camila? You just- you didn't say anything and now I'm scared that you don't want to be my friend yet. I mean, that's okay, but I just thought maybe-" Lauren was cut off by Camila," Lauren. We're friends, stop freaking out. I was just thinking about how I haven't had a friend, a good one, in a really long time. I'm glad I have you." The younger girl pulled Lauren in for a hug, proposing the idea that they should watch an episode of Friends before they went their separate ways. Both girls slept well that night, a combination of being happy and tired from the beach.
*AN* Hope you guys liked this chapter. If you have any suggestions, let me know! Love you!
-Callie <3