isaiah
i took another bite and unconsciously moaned into the second bacon cheeseburger that i got from wendy's.
this was so good. but i still feel fat after ordering so much food. i frowned at that thought, but still took another bite from the burger, my eyes slightly rolling backwards.
in the corner of my eye, i saw the sun descended behind the may tall buildings that were scattered across our city.
"probably should get going." i mumbled to myself. i looked into the wendy's bag and saw that i still had some fries left and half of my lemonade.
putting all my trash in one bag and wiping off my hands, i restarted the engine of the car and began my drive back home.
the closer i got to my neighborhood, the more i kept hoping that ms. joyette and her sons have left. it's been hours since i left, so certainly, hopefully, they would be too.
but, knowing my mom, being very social, she'd find a way to have conversation with someone for hours and hours on end, maybe even a whole day if circumstances favored.
and i hoped that this wouldn't be one of those times.
after about five more minutes in the car, i had finally arrived to our street, and slowly drove down it, nearing our house.
i cursed to myself when i began to park the car in the driveway. i absolutely hated doing this; i didn't like driving because being on the road, any road, made me panicky and i was always scared that i wasn't driving right and that at any moment someone would honk their horn angrily at me, and i didn't think i'd be able to take that. so, most of the time, my mom or luna took me places.
successfully parking the car without scratching or bumping into anything. i turned off the engine and sighed heavily, popping a fry into my mouth.
i waited in the car a bit longer, just to see what would happen but everything outside was mainly still.
except for across the street.
across the street, his house precisely, there was distant laughter and low obscure voices, most likely belonging to a group of guys.
my forehead began to sweat. dammit. nick must have had his friends over.
maybe i should have come back earlier. or disobeyed my mom and come back much, much later.
i anxiously tapped my fingers against my thigh and thought about how this situation could have played out. he already knew it was me in the car, because he saw me leave. his friends probably already know that i live across the street; nick must've surely told them already. and now, time is passing and i'm still sitting in the car. i began to sweat more profusely at the thought of them staring at my car, practically waiting for me to step out so they can taunt me.
i feared it so bad, i began to bite on my already short fingernails, a habit i've been trying to break since i was a kid.
i wish i could just stay in the car until they all went away, but i knew i couldn't do that. that would make me look even weirder. and plus, i was craving my bed more and more with each passing second.
just to see, i glanced at the rearview mirror and i had a sort of good view of them from the steps of his house. and there nick sat. a rolled paper in his mouth and i watched him, intrigued, almost mesmerized, as he blew smoke in and out of his mouth like second nature. it was hard to tear my gaze away from him as he smiled a toothy, metal grin at the a brownskinned guy next to him, and he ran his hand through his shoulder-length dreads.
i bit the inside of my lip and finally had the strength to look away from him. "damn." i cursed, tightly gripping the fabric of my sweats, right next to my crotch area.
"no, no, no, no." i stopped myself and squinted my eyes shut. "stop it. don't even go there." i mumbled to myself.
gazing back into the rearview mirror, i saw that there were about three more people sitting around him, all of them i recognized, but i didn't quite know their names. why would i care?
chris not being there made this even harder. he was visiting his aunt for the weekend. even if we aren't that close, he was still nice to me. in a way.
yawning, then taking a deep breath, i briefly closed my eyes as i took the keys out the ignition and opened the car door with a shaky hand, as i threw one foot after the other out the car.
i grew intensely nervous as i was tempted to look in the direction of his house, just to see if he was looking.
i glanced over there for about two seconds and of course he was. he was staring right at me, an evil smirk plastered on his face. i felt my heart speed up and instantly regretted my decision.
i sped walk to the front door of my house and pulled the keys out my hoodie pocket, which ended up on the ground because it slipped through my fingers out of nervousness.
i grumbled incoherent words as i struggled to put the key in the hole for a few seconds, making me have a mini panic attack because i knew they were watching me.
i had finally unlocked the door and was about to slam the door shut when i heard a voice yell "hey!". i stopped mid-step and listened again to see if it was directed at me.
but honestly, who would want to talk to me?
"aye! isaiah!" i whipped my head around to the sound of my name and it was nick who had uttered it. i shuddered as i replayed him calling my name in my head. it sounded so unusual hearing my name come out his mouth. there were even times where i thought he didn't even know what my name was. at school, he would always addressed me as "you" or whatever, if he even addressed me at all.
i trembled under his intense stare, even from across the street. "enjoy your little drive?" he asked in loud voice so i could hear him, in a taunting tone. his friends around him snickered and glared at me as well.
i opened my mouth to say something, anything, even if it wasn't an insult, but i just couldn't. feeling scared and targeted, as if i was about to break down, i ran inside the house and locked the door behind me, startling ms. joyette and my mom who were happily chatting in the kitchen until i came in.
"honey? how was your drive? " my mom asked in a voice laced with concern.
"are you okay dear? you look flushed." ms. joyette commented on my countenance.
i nodded my head, not being able to answer either of them. "fine. i'm good." i mumbled. i walked quickly to the kitchen and dropped my keys into the bowl and scurried up the stairs into my safe haven: my bedroom.
i sighed in content, shutting the door behind me slipping off my moccasins. i took my hoodie in a swift motion and slipped on a plain black t-shirt that hung off the door of my closet and changed back into the basketball shorts i had on earlier.
i climbed into my bed and engulfed myself in my comforters. the feeling of your bed swallowing you up after a long day is the best feeling in the world.
i got my phone off the table next to me and checked the time. 7:32 p.m.
wow. it wasn't even late. kids my age would be out with their friends, talking on the phone with several people, or waiting till sunday evening to finish homework.
but not me. i was a lame, i finished my homework as soon as possible, i didn't have close enough friends to hang around with and i barely had five contacts saved in my phone.
i was pathetic. a sorry excuse for a millenial who couldn't even talk to anyone without freezing up or stuttering, or over-analyzing and judging them before i met them.
sighing again at my own thoughts, i turned on my phone and went to the netflix app, which is like, literally all i do on my phone besides play games.
scrolling for something new to watch, i unconsciously gazed to my right and strained my eyes to see across the street, just to see what was going on.
the sky had gotten considerably darker, turning to a dark blue and the street lights had already come on.
from where i lay, i saw the top of the heads of four people, including nick himself, and i strained my ear to hear a distant door closing, meaning they went inside.
i felt a tiny pang in my chest as i heard his front door close. now i couldn't monitor him from my window, if that's what i wanted, which i don't.
i thought back to how i was sitting in car having an inner debate with myself as i stared at nick through the rearview mirror.
i pictured him giving that dimpled smile of his, his dimples evident in both his cheeks. i remembered how well he inhaled the smoke from his blunt and how heavenly he looked when he exhaled it. i absentmindedly tugged on my curls as i thought about how coordinated his outfits were and i crossed my legs over each other as i recalled him running his fingers through the mop dreads on his head, revealing his fresh line up and blemish free forehead.
must be nice to look that good.
i scowled at myself and pinched my arm when i realized how much i was thinking about nick. especially in that manner. i curled in a ball on my side, away from the window.
yet, it still made the bottom of my stomach feel all weird and light whenever i thought about nick in that way, or if i thought of him at all.
i shook my head trying to focus on finding something interesting to watch. soon enough after finding one, i got up from my comfortable position, even though i really didn't want to, to make sure the window was closed and locked.
i was about to draw the blinds when i saw nick walk out his house yet again, dragging a very large black bag to the curb.
i was stuck in that place, almost in awe as i once again observed and analyzed him from afar, trying to figure him out.
but i just couldn't. i dreaded getting close to anyone who weren't family long enough without getting paranoid that they didn't like me, or that they were silently judging me.
i stared longingly from my window at his lean but fit frame and watched him walk away from the curb and back into his house.
i drew the blinds shut, and only the streetlamps from outside shone through them. i stood still at the closed blinds and stared mindlessly at the windowsill, feeling discontent.
suddenly, my room door opened and i heard my mom's voice, pulling me out of my depressing reverie.
i jumped backwards and whipped around, my hand flying to my chest. my breathing had become hitched in my throat, but soon felt myself calming down.
"jesus mom!" i hissed, my hand still over my heart. even though my breathing slowed, my heart still beat against my ribcage. "don't scare me like that."
she gave me a sheepish smile and small giggle. "i'm sorry. i just wanted to see what you were up to. my co-worker just left."
i climbed back into bed and covered my whole body up to my neck. "i'm okay." i murmured
she nodded her head and looked at me. she seemed like she wanted to say something else but decided not to, and she left the room in silence, leaving me alone.
i got cozy once more and clicked on the movie 'se7en' and turned the volume up a little, trying to take my mind off stressful things. also known as nick. just thinking about him was stressful.
after about 30 minutes, i got restless and decided to pause the movie, deciding to watch it when i was feeling more depressed or tired than usual. i chuckled at my own bitter thoughts.
i felt exhausted and i had to mentally prepare myself to face other people tomorrow.
setting my phone down i got into a comfortable position and closed my eyes.
even though i would never admit it, not even to myself, i wanted to feel that fluttery feeling in my stomach. and all i do was use my brain and it happened.
i ended up drifting off to sleep with my neighbor from across the street on my mind.
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hey everyone !!
so as promised, here is the finished part of chapter three. i sincerely hope you all enjoy it, because i worked hard on this one. (just as much as the others lol.)
[excuse mistakes or errors.]
so, i have this thing where my brain is forcing me to write at least 2000 words per chapter, and this chapter well exceeded that with over 2,200 words, and i wanted to go farther but it's late and i'm lazy :)
anyways, PLEASE how you like the story so far and how i'm doing when writing this.
any improvements i can make? lmk !
again, please comment and vote and all of that! it really motivates and helps me, and i love hearing from y'all :))
vi 💜