I change my mind.
This chapter is trash.
:) enjoy
Recap:
"I- " B swallows, her eyes as round as the moon, "I wanted this to be a d-d-date too."
...I'm not- I'm not dreaming, right?
"Are you- " Jimin can't believe his ears. The beautiful silver angel timidly reaches out to grip his hand in hers, but all Jimin can do is stare, his eyes blown wide in disbelief, "Are you serious? Is this... am I dreaming?"
"No, Jiminie." B smiles shyly, her cheeks burning red. Her velvet voice is softer than usual, and a hint more sweet, "You're not dreaming. I really m-mean it."
"You..." Jimin blinks down at the girl sitting directly in front of him, her pale skin glowing with the vibrant hues of the sunset. Wisps of sparkling hair fall into her eyes, her braid less perfect than it was two hours ago, and yet she looks more beautiful than ever. Jimin's brain is frozen in time, his eyes glued to her delicate face, those seven words circling over and over inside his head. Jimin's tongue fights against itself, a million questions wanting to tumble out all at once, "Is this... a prank, then?"
This has to be a prank. Jimin tries to convince himself that this isn't real, unable to come to terms with the sentence that just left B's lips. She must be joking. Someone like her can't possibly like someone as stupid as me.
"Jiminie, I-" B's breaths grow shallow, nervous resignation flickering across her face. She grips Jimin's hand tighter, her ice cold fingers trembling, "I really do mean it. I'll- I'll even say it if I have to!"
"Say what?" Jimin asks, a his face a painful concoction of confusion and hope. He cradles her hand in his, grasping onto it as if this is the last moment he'll ever get with her. Jimin doesn't know what he'll do if this all turns out to be fake.
"Jiminie, I-" She licks her lips, and shuts her eyes tight. The words tumble from her graceful lips, mumbled and scattered into syllables that Jimin strains to understand. The near-panicking boy only catches a few recognizable sounds, but those broken pieces are enough to jolt his heart to a stop.
"Angel."
The calm of Jimin's voice sends chills down his own spine.
"Say it again."
She forces her eyes open, their quivering depths meeting Jimin's fiery gaze. Their eyes lock, stuck together like magnets. B swallows, more nervous than Jimin has ever seen her before.
"I-" Her bottom lip quivers, and her voice is trembling, "I l-l-like you t-too."
* * * *
"The heck is it so quiet?" The palest member of Bangtan grumbles, heaving a bored sigh. His lazy cats' eyes flicker over to the clock on the living room wall, following the second hand as it slowly ticks around the center. Silence fills the dorm, an occasional shout from the direction of Tae's room (he and Jungkook are probably playing Overwatch) as the only interruption. Yoongi feels strangely desolate, the constant sound of nothingness almost suffocating.
His eyes slide back over to the TV, where a show he has absolutely no interest in is playing. He attempted to satiate his boredom with the annoyingly large screen for a while, but his stingray documentary ended an hour ago, and after that he lost interest and muted the darn thing.
It's been so long since Yoongi had last watched real television that he'd almost forgotten what advertisements were like. In all honestly, his wishes he had forgotten. The overly peppy actors made him want to puke his guts out and then stab himself in the eye with a particularly blunt fork. So he finally muted the thing.
But now the dorm is too quiet. It definitely doesn't help that Yoongi feels hopelessly empty without her beside him. He's grown extremely attached to her comforting presence over the past week, and being apart from her, even if it's only for a few short hours, makes him feel excruciatingly lonely.
The cute photos Jimin had sent had eases his worry for a short while, but it doesn't take long for the feeling of emptiness to return. The two of them are out there enjoying a beautiful day, while Yoongi is stuck in here watching TV by himself. He stares at B's breathtakingly beautiful smile [@thebtsblonde (cringy inside joke warning: hEy~~~ CaN I hAvE yOuR nUmBeR? yOuR sMiLe Is BrEaThTaKiNg. *clears throat awkwardly*] until his heart starts to throb, and then he hastily tucks his phone back into his pocket.
The man attempts to soothe his tense nerves by stretching his tired limbs and clenching and unfurling his fingers, but it only makes him ache even more for his missing piece. He wants to be where Byeol is, make her eyes light up with laughter, and tell her just how precious she is to him. Sheer willpower keeps him seated on the couch.
Just a few more minutes, Min. Yoongi chants to himself. Do it for the idiots. Your family. Do it for them. You've got this.
If it was any of the other boys out with Byeol-ah right now, Yoongi would already be in his car and on his way to pick them up. He wouldn't give them (whichever boy it was) a single spare second. He loves his members, and trusts them with his life, but he knows that it's only going to be so long until one of them does something stupid.
All of them except Jimin. Yoongi trusts Jimin with everything, because... --because he's Jimin. There simply isn't a single malicious bone in that boy's body.
And when it comes to Byeol-ah, Yoongi trusts Jimin more than anything. He's seen the look in his dongsaeng's eyes when she smiles. He's seen the protective arm Jimin slings over her shoulder and wraps hesitantly around her waist. And Yoongi's personally (and regretfully) witnessed the gentleness Jimin uses when she's panicking beyond all reason.
There's no doubt in Yoongi's mind. Jimin would rather die than hurt his "angel" in any way, shape, or form.
That fact eases Yoongi's worry a little, letting him relax back into the couch. He planned to give the two a few extra minutes, just in case a certain somebody decides to man up, so that's what he's going to do-- separation anxiety or not.
* * * *
Jimin never thought this day would come. He's never really even thought about it before, because he thought that it simply wasn't possible. Min Byeol, the most beautiful young woman he's ever seen, likes him? Yeah right. He's never even considered that this could be a possibility, yet here she is-- confessing. Just like he did less than two minutes ago.
I can't believe this is happening.
If Jimin's brain didn't work before, it definitely doesn't work now. It feels like he's stuck in time, his entire being frozen in the moment the last syllable left her lips. The impossible just occurred right before his eyes, and he can do absolutely nothing about it except stare down at her as the words fight their way through his tangled mind.
She likes me. My angel likes me back. She actually likes me!
But Jimin's silence gives B the wrong impression, and her eyes start to glisten as the panic settles in. B pulls her hand away from Jimin's, the absence of her warmth leaving an aching sensation in the pit of his stomach. She wraps an arm self consciously around herself, her eyebrows creasing.
"I'm s-sorry I didn't say anything earlier." B looks about ready to burst into tears, Jimin's odd silence scaring her. Midnight eyes turn red-rimmed as her cheeks turn scarlet. She rambles nervously, her voice shaking, "I just- I didn't know if you actually liked me or not, though you a-acted like you did, but I didn't wanna be rejected, and I've- I've never c-confessed to someone before, and I th-th-th--"
"No, no, no! Don't apologize!" Jimin's voice bursts out of his chest, the boy snapping out of his daze the moment tears threaten to spill out of her dark eyes, "You did nothing wrong, angel. I just-- I don't know what to say! I never thought that you'd- you'd ever like me back. I always thought it was hopeless. So this is a little... overwhelming?"
"Over-" B's face stays cold and mildly terrified, but her eyes retract their stormy forecast, "Overwhelming?"
"Yeah. I already have a hard time keeping my thoughts coherent," Jimin admits sheepishly, his ears turning red, "But being around you makes it so much worse. When I'm with you I kinda... turn into a nervous wreck?" AN: UNDERSTATEMENT OF THE YEAR.
B's face stays perfectly still, not a hint of emotion escaping. Jimin knows that the empty facade is her own way of protecting herself while she overthinks his explanation, so he wills himself to keep calm.
"Is that a good thing?" B asks, her voice small. The endearing child-like curiosity lining her tone draws a soft smile out of Jimin, and he reaches out to gently peel her arm off from around her. Jimin half expects her to lash out the moment he touches her, but instead she willingly lets him guide her into a more comfortable position.
"Well..." Jimin hums as he slides his fingers in between her tiny ones and links their hands together. He stares at their intertwined fingers for a moment before looking directly into B's soul, a hopeful glint in his chocolate eyes, "My lungs get all jittery whenever you're nearby, and I always overthink everything before it say it, because I don't want to ever hurt of offend you. I can't stop worrying when you're not with either me or hyung, and sometimes I really want to take Yoongi hyung's place when he holds your hand, spoils you with pretty things and makes sure you eat enough. When I'm talking with you, stupid things come out of my mouth even when I tell them not to, and my heart threatens to explode every time you look at me. And even though it's a little scary to feel these things all the time-"
Jimin swallows thickly, his gaze warm as firelight.
"It- it can be a good thing." Jimin speaks softly, "If you w-want it to be."
* * * *
Yoongi has a habit of getting lost in his own thoughts. Most of the time his thoughts are harmless. He'll often think up entire songs inside his head, jokingly plan ways that he's going to murder the annoying boys he calls his family, or consider options for their next group concept. Creativity often strikes him at the oddest moments, and he always falls into a silent jumble of thoughts when his best ideas slowly surface. But, as with all humanity, his thoughts aren't always good. There are times where Yoongi's mind is his own worst enemy.
Granted, it's better than it used to be. Yoongi used to drown in his own self-depreciating thoughts, curling himself into a ball and crying for hours. He used to have stage fright as well, his social anxiety -- something he thinks formed because of the absence of B's presence -- kept him from reaching his full potential. The social anxiety is now mostly gone, and he doesn't care much about anybody's hateful opinions anymore, but that doesn't mean all of the bad thoughts are gone forever.
Usually these bad thoughts manifest in the form of overthinking things. He'll feel the anxiety creep up on him some days, often over stupid things like how Bang PD will react to the new song Yoongi wrote, or if Jin will be angry at him for forgetting to pick up some eggs at the store. Usually, his thoughts aren't about something like... this.
He knows that she's going to have to leave tomorrow. He's known for over a week now that she''l eventually have to go back to her beloved job and cruel boss, and she'll have to continue living out her normal life just like everyone else. But for some reason it suddenly hits him that-- that she's leaving tomorrow. She isn't going to be here all the time anymore, feeling safe, happy, warm, fed, and loved. She won't be here. And something about that feels so wrong.
She'll be fine. Yoongi breaths are heavy, weighed down by the dread settling in his gut. She's a strong, independent Min. And she promised to tell me if anything ever goes wrong. She'll be alright.
But for once, his own logical reasoning doesn't lessen the heavy feeling. Instead the ache to hold her, to protect her from the dangers of the world with his own body if the need arises, grows a thousandfold. He wants to see her now. He needs to know that she's okay. He needs to.
It almost pains him to have to wait for a single second, but somehow he keeps himself sitting perfectly still. His sharp eyes follow each jolt of the second-hand of the clock. His entire body is rigid, tensed in preparation to sprint at a moment's notice. But he remains hunched over on the couch, his elbows resting on the tops of his bent knees.
Just 30 more. Yoongi's lungs expand and contract slowly, the steady intake of oxygen the only barrier between him and mind-numbing worry. Just 30 more seconds, Min. I can leave then. I can take it until then. Just half a minute more.
But half of a minute feels more like half a century to the anxious rapper. Every second becomes a thousand days when Byeol isn't beside him. Yoongi dreads the moment Byeol has to leave-- back to the dorm full of girls he doesn't trust and a boss who he mildly wants to murder with a blunt object.
Ten seconds... Eight seconds... Come on, come on-- three seconds... 8:05.
And then Yoongi is down the hall in a flash, keys in hand and his jacket slung hastily over his shoulder. He bursts out the front door like a hurricane, in too much of a hurry to worry about closing the door behind him. He knows he'll get a scolding from Jin for it, but right now he can't find it in him to care. He flings the car door open and slams it shut behind him, simultaneously turning the key in the ignition and pulling his belt on.
Why do I suddenly miss her so much? Yoongi yanks the gear shifter into drive and screeches out of the driveway. I was fine when she went out with the other guys before. I still missed her like crazy, but it didn't feel so... desperate. It feels like... It feels like I'm missing a part of me. A necessary part of me that keeps me breathing.
Yoongi tries not to speed, but his foot feels as heavy as lead. Thankfully the traffic in the outskirts of Seoul isn't too bad, and his destination is only 15 minutes away. He resists the urge to weave around the car in front of him and speed away. If Yoongi got pulled over, that'd be a stain on his pristine reputation and even more time away from Byeol. So he keeps under the speed limit, his knuckles white as he grips the steering wheel.
The distance passes amazingly quick, the scenery changing from tall apartment buildings surrounding BigHit to the quiet suburbs.
Only five more minutes, Yoongi. Just five more minutes until...
The pale rapper blinks innocently as the red brake lights of the car in front of him flicker on, hesitating for only a moment before smoothly moving his own foot to gently press on the brake.
Why are we slowing down?
All cars in the lane come to a complete stop, and Yoongi suddenly wants to slam his face through the window.
He's been caught in traffic.
* * * *
"Do you..." B's tone is unlike anything Jimin's ever heard. A satin quilt of hope, fear, anxiousness, skepticism, excitement and joy all stitched together, "Do you really mean that?"
"I mean every word I said." Jimin assures her, and he's never been more certain of anything in his whole life., "I mean, I still need to ask for Yoongi Hyung's permission before anything becomes official, but would you... do you want to.. be- you know, t-together?"
B opens and closes her mouth, her cheeks burning fiery red. Her doll-like lips slowly curl into a shy smile, and her dark feline eyes glow.
Don't scream. Don't scream. Keep it together, Park Jimin. I know she's freaking cute and you really wanna smother her in affection right now, but you gotta keep-- it-- together.
"You want to be t-together?" B queries, her voice a tiny bit louder, "With me?"
How could I not want to be with you? It's hard to believe that B doesn't know just how wonderfully sweet she is, but Jimin doesn't want her to feel even more insecure, so he keeps his mouth shut. You're more sincere, naturally gorgeous, and real than any other girl I've met. I'd be crazy if I didn't want to spoil you like you deserve.
"Y-yes." Jimin nods vigorously, tugging their intertwined hands closer and cradling them against his chest, "Very much."
"I..." B falters, her fingers curling tighter around Jimin's, "I w-want that too."
Jimin's certain that his heart is going to explode. His face breaks out into a blinding smile, and he instinctively brings B's small hand up to his mouth to plaster her knuckles with a barrage of ecstatic kisses. B tries to cover her burning red face with her free hand, but she can't fully hide the curl of her lips and the tell-tale crescent eyes of happiness.
"Jiminie!" B bashfully protests when Jimin lovingly presses her hand to his cheek, but she makes no move to stop him, "You're going to ask oppa?"
"Of course." The Jimin says, enjoying the feeling of her soft skin against his cheek much more than he should be, "You mean the world to him, and I don't want him to feel like I'm threatening his family. You know how protective Yoongi hyung is."
B hums in agreement, peeking out from behind her fingers.
"It might..." Jimin clears his throat in mild embarrassment, "It might take me a week or so to work up the courage to talk to him, but I'll do it for you, angel. I'll talk to him as soon as I can."
"Oppa can be pretty scary when he's worried." B gently laughs, still a little timid as she lowers her hand, "Don't be embarrassed. Take all the time you need. I can- I can wait."
* * * *
Of all times, why did there have to be traffic now? Yoongi groans, thumping his head against the top of the steering wheel as he waits for the car in front of him to finally move. I can count the number of times that this neighborhood has had bad traffic in the past five years on one hand. The probability of getting stuck in traffic here is ridiculously low, yet somehow I still managed to get delayed on the one day I really, really needed to be somewhere.
The man in the car behind Yoongi looks just as frustrated, and the tall figure steps out of his own car and starts walking in the direction of the traffic blockage. Yoongi rolls down his window as the stranger walks by, curiosity taking precedent over his introversion.
"You going to find out what's going on?" Yoongi asks as politely as he can muster, leaning his head out the window to properly face the man.
"Yeah," The man stops walking and turns to face Yoongi, his face a mix of annoyed and worried, "I'm thinking it's probably an accident up ahead. I'll update you when I come back."
"Thanks."
Yoongi slouches in his seat and flicks on the radio, some annoying main-stream pop song trickling through the speakers. He absentmindedly taps his fingers on the dash as he waits, and with his left hand he pulls down the sun-shade to quickly examine his appearance in the mirror. The mint green locks are a little scruffy from lounging on the couch for much too long, and his cheeks are unnaturally pale from anxiousness, but he doesn't look horrible. Just a little scarier than usual.
With a sigh Yoongi flips the shade back up, hating the wild look in his own eyes. He takes pride in his ability to remain permanently unruffled-- years of having to suffocate his emotions payed off in a wall of impenetrable defense-- but Yoongi doesn't feel as if he's living up to his reputation today. The empty ache of vulnerability throbs in his chest instead, and, to be frank, Yoongi doesn't like it.
It doesn't take very long for the other man to return, his face a collage of sympathy and grim acceptance. Yoongi rolls his window back down as the man walks up, his own face grim.
"Crash?" Yoongi asks, his tone reserved.
"Yeah- a two car collision." The man frowns, "It looked pretty bad, but they said that they'll be done clearing the road in under five minutes."
"That's too bad." Yoongi hums, feeling terrible for his earlier tantrum, "I hope they're alright. Thanks for the update, man."
"Sure thing."
Five minutes. Yoongi leans his forehead up against the wheel after he rolls the window back up, his eyes tightly shut. Only five more minutes.
* * * *
"Do you think hyung will..." Jimin pauses, hating how his insecurity cripples him, even when he's talking to his closest friends (though hopefully she won't be just a friend for much longer). He brushes past the suffocating feeling, clutching his pretty angel's small hand, "A-accept me? You're the most precious thing in the entire world to him, and I don't know if he'd like you dating someone like-"
"You're precious to him too!" B insists, and she's being 100% serious if her narrowed eyes are anything to go by, "And you're precious to m-me. If he won't let you date me, I doubt he'll let anyone. You're one of his best friends, and I know he trusts you. If he doesn't accept us, he's probably just overthinking things, and I'll talk to him and assure him that-- that I want this. A r-relationship. With you."
Jimin's not sure if it's physically possible, but it feels like his insides are melting.
"D-don't look at me like that!" B fusses, her eyes everywhere except Jimin's.
"If you want to be my 자기야 [jagiya] then you're going to have to get used to me looking at you like this." Jimin half-teases, his tone saturated with a little too much honey. But underneath his teasing tone, Jimin really does mean what he said. What's the point of dating Byeol if he can't stare at her like she's gorgeous (which she is), shower her in pretty things (which he is most definitely going to do as soon as he gets Yoongi's permission), and cuddle her like only Yoongi get to, "How am I supposed to not stare at you when you're being so sweet, angel?"
B doesn't respond, too busy hiding her blush behind a small pale hand.
* * * *
The estimate was right on the mark, as five minutes later the long caravan of cars slowly begins to creep forward. Yoongi sighs in relief and takes the car out of park, happily following the car in front of him as they begin to roll towards his long-awaited destination. The nagging sensation eases a little as he visibly watching the scenery pass by, knowing that he's steady getting closer to his precious princess.
He arrives at the park much later than he expected (8:26 isn't too much later, he attempts to reason, only to be shot down by his own anxious mind), and parks in the spot closest to the gate. He pulls out his phone and rushes out a series of texts, feeling more and more irritable with each passing second.
swagustd: im here
swagustd: in the parking lot
swagustd: waiting
swagustd: where r u?
Okay, so maybe I'm a little more impatient than usual. Yoongi leans his head back and closes his eyes, exasperation shooting through him like poison. Deep breaths, Min Yoongi. They'll be here soon.
It's a good thing that Jimin is a fast texter, or Yoongi might've gotten up and searched for the pair himself. The sudden ding of his phone startles him at little, his eyes flashing open, and he quickly lifts the device and scans the two new messages.
Mochim: Sorry hyung! I hope you didn't wait long.
Mochim: We'll be there in a minute ^_^
swagustd: you better be
Yoongi might feel bad later for sounding so hostile, but right now he's just too anxious to care. He drums his fingers on the steering wheel, his eyes prowling for any threats in the vicinity (there are none), and he attempts to wipe all traces of worry off his face. Yoongi is well aware that both B and Jimin can read him like a book. If he shows any signs of being stressed-- even something as small as a sigh-- the two runts will be on his back for at least a week.
He flips the mirror down again, partly just for something to do, and partly to check his expression. His hair is just as messy as it was before, and he quickly combs through it, wincing when he finds an inevitable tangle. He pats his bangs down and nods at his reflection, glad that his eyes no longer look feral. Yoongi flips the sunshade back into it's place when his ears pick up a faint sound, and he lowers his eyes to see his favorite faces in the entire world.
Byeol is still as stunning as the night sky, her bangs trailing into her sharp eyes and her taffy pink lips curved into a hint of a smile. Yoongi's own mouth betrays him when he notices Jimin's extra jacket covering her form, and he can't help but smile a little at the glow radiating from her dark eyes.
Jimin is glowing too, his eyes sparkling like dewdrops, but his steps are little more hesitant. He walks close to B, his arm draped protectively around her shoulders like usual, but something seems... different. Something Yoongi can't quite put his finger on.
Byeol's face lights up like a beacon as soon as she spots Yoongi lounging in his car, and she abruptly abandons Jimin in favor of sprinting in her oppa's direction. Yoongi happily steps out of the car to meet her, catching her as she jumps on him out of excitement. The tight mess of anxiety curdling in Yoongi's gut vanishes the moment he picks B up, and a feeling that can only be described as warmth replaces it.
"Oppa!" B smiles too brightly for Yoongi to handle, her skinny legs wrapping around Yoongi's middle, "Jiminie bought me chocolate truffles!"
"Did he, now?" Yoongi questions slyly, glancing behind his princess to see Jimin smiling sheepishly. Said boy raises a to-go bag and nods, drawing a chuckle out of Yoongi, "That's good. He's doing a good job of spoiling you like I told him to, isn't he, princess?"
"They're just truffles!" B pouts, "That shouldn't even count as spoiling! You spoiled me way worse than that!"
"I did, didn't I?" Yoongi smirks, highly pleased with himself, "Are you still wearing your pretty rings?"
"Of course, oppa!" B chirps, lifting her left hand into Yoongi's line of sight. Two of her three rings are glittering on her pointer and third fingers, "They're too pretty to take off."
"I'm glad you think so." Yoongi hums, sneakily kissing her knuckles before B can move her hand away. The small girl squeaks in surprise, but doesn't protest, letting her older brother turn around and carry her towards the car, "You two ready to go home, then? Jin will probably want us all to do something together before-- before tomorrow morning."
B nods, her eyes bright, and Yoongi reluctantly sets her on the pavement next to the car. Jimin, who was following closely behind them, quickly opens the backseat door for her. Both boys hold out their hands to assist her, but she only giggles before climbing into the car on her own.
Suddenly a real gentleman, eh? Yoongi internally smirks, watching Jimin shut the door for her. The boy looks up from the task and finds himself swiftly caught in Yoongi's menacing gaze. Yoongi narrows his eyes, thoroughly enjoying the younger's paling complexion. I can see right through you, Park Jimin.
"Oppa!" B protests, startling Yoongi out of his glare. She looks up at him with a small frown through the reopened door, "Don't be a bully! He's was just being nice, and you're scaring him!"
Jimin's eyes are suddenly sparkling because of B's adorable defense. The orange haired dancer smiles blindingly (literally--Jimin once admitted he can't see when he's smiling), his fear suddenly forgotten. B's eyes brighten in response, and a hint of a smile creeps onto her face. Yoongi looks slowly between the two, his eyebrows slowly raising.
"It's alright, angel." Jimin assures her, "Yoongi hyung is probably just miffed because I tried to do his job. It's my fault."
"I guess so." B hums in acquiescence, her eyes soft. She turns to Yoongi, and thankfully her expression stays warm, "It's just Jiminie, oppa. You've known him longer than I have, and you know that you don't have to worry about him, right? You're still going to be my only oppa in the entire world!"
Yoongi is tempted to smile and agree, but his mouth refuses to work, shock rooting him in place.
Never in Yoongi's life has B ever sided with anyone else but him. Never. No matter how stupid Yoongi's argument is, she's always supported him.
Well, until today.
What the heck happened in the last three and a half hours?
Now, Yoongi supposes, he might need to get used to sharing her support.
This definitely wasn't my best work. I think my book addiction is getting the best of me again, and I can't put my books down long enough to get some rest, which makes me practically unable to write anything worth reading. I'm sorry for my poor updating skills, guys. I'll try to sleep more often. :(
P.S. --if you're confused about the constantly changing contact names, it's because each person has different contact names saved into their phone. For example, Jimin has Yoongi saved as sugabear😎 and himself as Jiminie, while Yoongi has Jimin saved as Mochim and himself as swagustD.
Fire away with those predictions.... the drama is on it's way.
I miss you guys~
~singformeangel
5162 words.