THE sudden scream felt like an ambush as I just froze in place at the door with my mouth hung open in shock and my eyebrows together in fear. Practically everyone we worked with was here in this small apartment. I looked around, as everyone laughed and cheered together, and noticed Johnny coming my way first.
He wrapped his arms around my neck and patted my back. "You okay, Nik?"
"Mm, hm," I hummed and finally gulped from the shock of it all. I felt Candice place her hand on my back and laughed. Johnny let go of me and I faced the two master-minds behind this whole operation. "This was all you guys?"
"Hell yes," Candice giggled, then placed a quick kiss on Johnny's cheek. "I got you out of the house while Johnny and Tommaso took care of all the decorations."
"Tommaso...?" I breathed out his name, so Candice smirked and pointed behind me. I slowly turned and there stood Tommaso, somewhat happy to be here.
Suddenly, Candice and Johnny didn't mean a thing to me because he was here now. I was suddenly glued to him, standing right in front of him with my eyes wide and completely focused on just him.
"Hey," I breathed his name out and smiled as wide as I could, like he was my only birthday present. "I was going to come and see you after dinner, because I didn't know I could invite anyone. But... You're here now."
"I am," he remarked, smirking. "And you're here, too, now."
"Exactly," I tried to giggle out, to cut out the awkwardness. It still was, though. "I'm glad that I'm here with you. I mean..." He chuckled and I now felt nervous. "I mean, uh... With everyone, y'know?"
He nodded and said, "Yeah, I figured that much."
As I was about to reply, I heard someone say my name and I looked beyond Tommaso's body, noticing Trevor standing there. He had a red cup in his right hand and a smile painted across his face. This is new, I thought to myself as I stepped by Tommaso to now stand with Trevor.
"Hey," I smiled, surprising myself when I said it, too. "How are you?"
He laughed and asked, "How I am? Well, to be honest with you, I'm good — but that doesn't really matter tonight. What matters is you because it is your birthday, Nik. Happy birthday."
"Thank you," I said back with a slight nod. "Well, um... Enjoy yourself. I'll be around."
"Thanks," he murmured out before dipping his head and heading to the kitchen, where Johnny and Candice were standing at.
I slowly turned back to Tommaso and smiled (again), especially because I can't help myself when he's around nowadays. "I'm not sure if I've mentioned this, but," I paused and stepped closer to him, then dropped my voice down, "I am really glad you're here."
"Yeah," he laughed and shrugged. "You've mentioned that once or twice before already."
"I figured that much," I teased, using his words against him. I bit down on my bottom lip and looked up at him. "Anyways, I should go get dressed since I looked the worst out of everyone."
He nodded, but did add before I could leave: "You definitely look the best out of everyone here, just saying." I blushed, but, by that point, I had already turned around and was walking away.
I found Candice in the kitchen with Johnny and Trevor, and asked for my dress, so she and I snuck away to my room to change together into our new dresses — to match everyone else here, all fancy and nice.
After we repainted our faces on and fixed our hair, we rejoined the rest of the party once again. I found myself next to Tommaso most of the time, all while enjoying everyone else's company as well.
Maybe tonight is the night that I finally get over Pete...
AN hour and a half passed by before, to be honest, I began to get a little bit bored. I just wanted the night to end already, but most of everyone was either drunk or halfway there.
I hadn't drank barley at all, while I watched everyone else do that. I was sitting at the bar, about to doze off, when I felt somebody's arms wrap around me. That definitely woke me up.
"Hey," Tommaso whispered in my ear and kept his arms wrapped around me. I could've just melted in them, if I was ice-cream in the hot summer heat. "How 'bout we get out here for a bit?"
"Hm," I hummed, smiling, and had my eyes closed until I bent my head baby and looked up at him. "Where shall we go?"
"Anywhere, but here," he whispered back in my ear and somehow grabbed my hand, now leading me away and out of the front door.
He held my hand until we were at the front door of his apartment, which wasn't far from Candice and Johnny's own place. He unlocked the door and knocked the door open, so I walked inside and waited for him — mostly because I didn't know where to go or what to do without him.
He stepped inside and shut the door behind him. He motioned towards a door behind me and said, "You can go ahead and go in there while I get us something to drink."
I didn't question him as I slipped through the door, where it was completely dark in her. I felt around until I felt a bed and, then, a side table and a light, which I switched on to help me to see for now on.
I ran my hand over the covers on his bed and sat down on it, feeling how much more comfortable it was than my bed. The bed was half-made up while, on the side that I was sitting on, wasn't made-up since he got up this morning.
As creepy as it sounds, I leaned down and smelt his main pillow. It didn't have much of a scent, especially since he doesn't have hair on his bald head. Nevertheless, I closed my eyes and fell back on it; and, then, I took the covers and threw them over me. I was really comfortable.
The door creaked open and he stood there, holding two glasses of water. He sat them down on the side-table and, then, crossed his arms over his chest and smirked. "Nicole," came his warning tone. "What the hell are you doing?"
"Sleeping," I smirked and patted the covers with my hands. "Come join me."
"Not when you're on my side," he sighed, but kept his lips curled. "C'mon, get up."
"Let me sleep," I giggled, but that didn't work. Because, he took ahold of my hand and helped me up until I was now standing up and lying against the bed with my feet on the ground. "Why can't I sleep for?"
"Because," he simply said and, for a split second there, I thought that it would be his final answer, too. He leaned in and continued, but as a whisper: "We have much to discuss."
"You want to talk?" I was surprised, so that's why my mouth dropped and my eyebrows jumped up together in shock. "Oh, hell yes. What about?"
"About...," he breathed out and, then, his body was pressed against mine, "us."
"Um... Us?" I stuttered out and that's when the heat between us became heavy. I suddenly couldn't breathe. He wanted me... Too.
Tommaso began to lean further into me and it looked like he was going in to kiss me. It felt like I had all the time in the world to think about this, so I did.
I want this. I do, but... As his lips are about to make an impact onto mine, I practically dipped out and ran out from being there with him. He stopped, confused and dazed, and spun around in question. My heart broke when I saw the look on his face. He probably felt so stupid, and so did I, too.
"Tommaso, I—"
"What the hell, Nicole?" he breathed out, cutting me off before I could say anything. "I thought... I don't know, I may be rusty, but I thought that you wanted me to?"
I tried to breath, but it came out with tears now streaming down my face and breaking through my make-up. "I-I do," I found myself confessing, having my arms crossed and my right hand over my mouth. "Tommaso, I do, but... I'm scared."
He gulped and, then, officially turned around to face me. He looked like he was trying to slow his pace to his ultimate blowing-up anger. "Scared of what?!"
"I am scared of all the things that this simple kiss will lead to," I countered, trying to match my tone with his. "I'm scared, Tommaso. My heart was just ripped out of my chest months ago."
"Well, Nicole," he began to say and shook his head, almost avoiding eye contact altogether. "If you can't see past what Pete did to you, then you will never be able to move on with your life."
What he just said was true and I know this. I do, but I still cannot see past it. So, before I can control what I say next, I completely blurt out: "I can't when he haunts my dreams at night and I think of him everyday!"
I knew that would piss Tommaso off and, indeed, it did. He threw his arms up and, for a moment there, I really believed that he was going to storm out of his own apartment, but he quickly regrouped and shook his head. He looked heartbroken, from the inside pouring out.
"You know what, Nicole?" He laughed this out, but I knew it was just a front for him not to become completely loose. "You had me at a point where I would've left the entire world behind for you."
Somehow, that is all he had to say for me to feel completely ridiculous — and on my own birthday, too. He didn't have to say that he now hated me or anything else. That... That was enough to seal the deal for us ever having a chance.
"I'm just a fucking fool, anyways," he added, and my blurry eyes looked up. He seemed really sad, and it was all my fault. "I'm a fool because I put myself out there again for you, just so you could let me down again."
Again, the shame was on my shoulders again and I knew that he was completely right. I just, at the moment, couldn't bring myself to love again — even if I already do.
— 💔 —